Humour

Category archives for Humour

Archaeological Zombies

Image by Joseph Hewitt of Ataraxia Theatre. Archaeology is a famously ghoulish pursuit whose practitioners are always on the look-out for dead bodies to gloat over. If we can’t find a grave, then at least we’ll try to get hold of animal bones from kitchen middens and sacrificial deposits. I’ve seen desperate Mesolithic researchers cackle…

Kinky Ikea Bathrobe

So Ikea sells this bathrobe called “Njuta”. It’s a verb, meaning “experience (intense) pleasure”, and it’s usually reserved for pretty powerful kinds of pleasure such as good food, good music, good sex. And Junior’s robe size here is Small to Medium, which goes some way towards explaining why the sticker on his new bathrobe reads:…

Becoming Lord of the Afterlife

I’m reading a collection of my favourite music critic’s journalism, Strage Text. Fredrik Strage and I were born the same year and both grew up loving Depeche Mode and Swedish role-playing games. He has a hilarious way of taking things that sound really cool in English and expressing them in Swedish, thus humanising the stars…

Dark Vengeance of Cryptic Slaughter

Discreetly hidden under the northern side of the eastern bridgehead of rural Täckhammar bridge is a spray-painted mural. I found it while checking for geocaches. It depicts an evil-looking male face accompanied by a really funny piece of Satanist prose poetry. “Dark vengeance of cryptic slaughter and Satanic suffering. The boundaries of Hell will brake…

Royal Hats

Who knew that it would be so much pure childish fun if someone with decent Photoshop skills put a collection of silly hats on Carolus XVI Gustavus? There’s even rumoured to be an unedited picture there, but I certainly can’t identify it.

In many of the world’s most affluent countries, the population is shrinking because people aren’t having enough children to replace the folks who die. This offers some hope to solve global overpopulation, though unfortunately the solution involves eradicating poverty and establishing global ecological sustainability, which ain’t exactly easy. These shrinking populations become demographically top-heavy, with…

When I was in school I read a great story about a man who took opium, felt that he had a great philosophical insight, wrote it down, and then found, after sobering up, that what he had written was “I perceive a distinct smell of kerosene”, Jag känner en distinkt doft av fotogen. Mucking around…

The Gangs of Åstorp

Sunday “… five men were indicted, some of them members of the Black Cobra criminal gang. They are suspected of involvement in cake theft from the Godbiten bakery in Åstorp [pop. 8500] earlier this week. The cake was stolen from a truck on an industrial estate. 120 boxes containing among other things mazarines, brownies and…

Hernia Brand Glue

Scandinavians generally speak pretty good English. But every now and then you come across reminders that they are still very far from being native speakers. Witness this pail of wall-paper glue that I bought earlier today. Dear Swedish glue-maker, “hernia” means brock and is defined as “the protrusion of an organ or the fascia of…