From self-described "greatest webcomic known to man" Saint Gasoline comes a fitness-oriented explanation of why so many ugly, fact-starved Web sites and arrogantly illiterate, blindly combative bloggers are "evolutionarily stable."
Saint Gasoline posits that a mechanism similar to allopatric speciation is responsible for the rare asshat-free online communities that persist today and how the infiltration of these loci by just one or two cock-monkeys may be sufficient to tear them asunder, rendering yet another splash of f*ck-holery unto the Internet. He even suggests that something resembling a fossil record supports the long and dominant history of asshats. Finally, in a discussion hearkening to Richard Dawkins' game-theory-oriented hypothesis in The Selfish Gene proposing why ecosytems are more stable given certain proportions of fight-winners, fugitives and pure losers than they are with dominant types alone, Saint Gasoline notes that even the most flagrant shit-cocks out there possess a vestigial sort of niceness whose occasonal manifestation is to the survival advantage of its generally scurrilous host.
If you don't laugh your way through the entire post, you may a benevolent sort who for all practical purposes became extinct from cyberspace yourself a long time ago, strictly assuming the role of observer today. If, on the otherhand, you don't understand Saint Gasoline's post and cannot even enjoy a chuckle at the style or content of the comics themselves, you should return to the sanctity and clamor your own blog -- which, as annoying as it is bound to be, is probably quite popular.
Comments
Great post! Total asshatness... poignent, yet pissy. Recommended reading for all people whose mothers are total whores.
Posted by: J-Dog | January 16, 2007 9:12 AM
Aha! So this is what explains the increased traffic to my site! It's a good thing I'm already an asshole, otherwise this influx of asshat competition from other sites would be likely to cause me to wilt away and delete everything I've ever posted online.
Posted by: Saint Gasoline | January 16, 2007 11:17 AM
My mother isn't a whore, but she does have Alzheimer's.
Does this mean I should start a blog?
Posted by: Bill from Dover | January 16, 2007 5:29 PM
Saint Gasoline! My, you sure do get around. While surfing Blogs tonight in search of anything chimp related I came across this Blog. And here you are!
I sure hope BookTalk.or is in your asshat-free online community short list. I do my best to keep them away, but the controversial nature of what we read and discuss seems like a virtual ass-hat magnet at times.
For those that care we're reading and discussing "The Third Chimpanzee" by Jared Diamond, so this is why I ran my search for "chimpanzee" and ran into you guys. It wasn't a random hit-n-run.
Posted by: Chris O'Connor | January 27, 2007 1:28 AM