From The Onion:
Admitting they had “absolutely no idea what the fuck [they were] doing,” millions of Americans immediately ceased trying to manage the country’s large-scale, ongoing disasters and pleaded with U.S. scientists, economists, educators, philosophers, and inventors to intervene and make things better again.
“You are good at doing things, and we are bad, okay? We admit it,” said Cincinnati-area executive Robert Everhart, who belongs to the growing consortium of citizens desperately asking America’s qualified people to take it from here. “So we’re begging you, please grab hold of the reins. We know we said we didn’t need to read any books or have a lot of expertise to do this stuff, but we were wrong. We need your help, and we need it bad.”
This, of course, was all that ASPO was waiting for – we figured we’d just hang out until someone asked . If we’d only known that someone wanted us to do something about the problem, we might have been at it before this .
Actually, believe it or not, we’ve been busy getting ready for the annual conference in DC, with a press conference on the step of the DOE and a letter delivered Tuesday to Energy Secretary Chu about our pending energy crisis.
I hope we will be seeing as many of you as possible at the ASPO-USA conference next week – the first half of Thursday’s events take place at the Congressional Auditorium, the rest just a few blocks from the Capitol and Union Station (in case y’all want to take the train in). Besides the many speakers and agenda items, there will be informal get togethers, including the Zombie-Fightin’ Women’s Peak Oil Resistance Society, being formed by myself and Nicole Foss for women working on these issues. I have high hopes of bringing in a lot of other amazing women working on this issue for a late night discussion of fiscal, energy and environmental preparedness (in NIc and my hotel room). You don’t want to miss this – I don’t want to miss you, either!
There is still time to register for the conference (I can’t believe I hit the road to DC in only 5 days!) – and we need you there to make clear to everyone just how important this issue is to so many people. You’ll never see this combination of speakers together in one place anywhere else!
If you are a teacher, student or graduate student in the area and would like to hear some of our speakers including Foss, Dmitry Orlov, Kurt Cobb, permaculture teacher Lisa Taranto, John Michael Greer, Aaron Newton, Me, Jeff Brown and others talk about the future of education in an era of depletion ABSOLUTELY FREE, please join us for our Saturday afternoon education conference from 1-5pm on November 5, in which we’ll explore the ways of presenting these issues to the public, to students, to faculty and administrations, through continuing, adult and public education and across every portion of the educational spectrum. Please register here and pass this information around to colleagues and students.