So the kids didn’t come into care yesterday, which means we can go back to being our usual slacker selves about putting away the legos, tinker toys and other choking hazards – until the next batch of little ones arrived. I admit to a mix of relief and sorrow. Relief that the children in question are not in such dire straits that they have to leave their home and family. Relief also because even though I’m loving having a baby around again, I’m not sure I really wanted two of them, plus two toddlers.
On the other hand, I really feel like our house is too empty right now – we have space and time and resources for more children than the five we’ve got, and everyone wants another placement. This wasn’t my ideal, but then, life isn’t ideal, and the kids who need us aren’t kids we get to pick.
The upside is that going into a weekend busy with Simon’s 11th birthday party and family visits, the house is tidy, the laundry is done, there are baked goods awaiting consumption and my stash of clothes for older girls is undergoing expansion…for the next time. Because that, of course, the thing – there’s always a next time. I wish there wasn’t, of course, but as long as there is, well, we’re readier.