NASA announced this morning that the upgraded USS Enterprise successfully launched from Edwards AFB, mounting a new retrofitted main engine system.


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USS Enterprise OV-101b coming in for landing from its surprise morning mission.

The Enterprise has been secretly refurbished with a new main engine system, and Cpt A. Stern, who recently stepped down from NASA’s SMD took her for a first test drive – they picked up the New Horizons probe on the way and dropped it off at its intended destination, “I didn’t want to have to wait any longer” Cpt Stern cryptically commented.

Hubble images of the refurbished Enterprise on its first test flight
The new engine system provides significant performance improvement and lower fuel costs.

Mission Scientist, Dr J. Mather, said “Hah! Yahoooo!”. He was also heard saying something about “lets see HQ claim we still need that budget margin for L2 launch costs”.

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USS Enterprise having its new main engine installed.

Cpt Stern expressed hope that a first science operations flight would be scheduled later this week, and was quoted as saying “I think we’ll check alfa-sen first, so those bloomin’ Californians will stop bugging us, maybe we can drop them off”.

There are rumours that HQ prefers two-a-day sorties to Mars for the first few weeks, although rumours that Halliburton drill rigs were seen arriving at Edwards are unconfirmed

There are further unconfirmed reports of a successor vehicle based on the Enterprise prototype, possibly two classes – a small crewed light vehicle, and a larger cargo craft.

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Rumours that the
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new Enterprise class starships under development are military vessels
are clearly false: “We come in peace” said a senior administrative spokesman, who asked to remain anonymous.

Comments

  1. #1 Zeno
    April 1, 2008

    Stories like this make me sorry that I never had that brilliant but beautiful blonde daughter to help me build my backyard moon rocket. Now I’ll never be able to fulfill my full potential as a mad scientist. Anyway, she probably would have betrayed me for the love of a handsome young rebel who plays by his own rules … etc., etc.

  2. #2 Dunkleosteus
    April 1, 2008

    OT: SuperWASP finds 10 new planets — http://www.superwasp.org/wasp_planets.htm

    …just kidding.

    NOT!

  3. #3 Handsome Young Rebel
    April 1, 2008

    Stories like this make me sorry that I never had that brilliant but beautiful blonde daughter to help me build my backyard moon rocket. Now I’ll never be able to fulfill my full potential as a mad scientist. Anyway, she probably would have betrayed me for the love of a handsome young rebel who plays by his own rules … etc., etc.

    Stop wallowing in sour grapes and pull yourself together, man. Maybe if you can stop drowning yourself in ethanol, we can team up for the big final scene.

  4. #4 carlos
    June 8, 2009

    you sould make a starship and lunch it in space with same people on it and name it enterprise ok love that name and think you sould make it bigger then the show

  5. #5 anonymous
    November 11, 2009

    “USS Enterprise OV-101b”?

    They should have at least called it “USS Enterprise NCC-1701″

    Would make the trekkies happy.

  6. #6 james evans
    March 23, 2010

    it would have had to have an NX number as it was an experimental or prototype ship.