Funniest. Onion. Article. Ever.

New Social Networking Site Changing The Way Oh, Christ, Forget It: Let Someone Else Report On This Bullshit

Virtually every line is laugh-out-loud funny.

According to sources we feel really, really sorry for, Foursquare works by allowing users to “check in” from their present location, whether it be a bar, restaurant, nearby magazine stand, or man, this piece would be perfect to hand over to that schmuck Dan Fletcher at Time magazine right about now.

By “checking in,” users can earn tangible, real-world rewards. For instance, the Foursquare user with the most points at any given venue earns the designation of “mayor” and can receive discounts, free food, or other prizes that, quite honestly, we’re thoroughly disgusted with ourselves for having actually researched.

In addition, please, kill us already.

Read the whole thing. It will make your day.

(Yes, yes, I know, I’m a social media booster, a location-based services booster, a shinyshiny boster, the whole nine yards. On the other hand, I also like to think of myself as a reality-based booster so something sending up mindless hype just seems that much funnier to me.)

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