Friday Fun: Neurologists Paint Grim Picture Of 'Madden' Football's Long-Term Effect On Players' Brains

I guess it's not just the physical hits to the head that leave a lasting effect on people's brains, but the long-term effects of bad video games also can cause your brains to leak out your ears.

From The Onion, Neurologists Paint Grim Picture Of 'Madden' Football's Long-Term Effect On Players' Brains.

SAN JOSE, CA--In an alarming report that sheds new light on the dangers of the game, the Institute for Brain Injury Research published Wednesday the results of a five-year investigation into the long-term neurological consequences of playing Madden football.

"The situation is far more serious than we had previously thought," said Vincent Wu, head of neuropathology at the IBIR. "Playing Madden football increases one's risk for a wide range of cognitive impairments, from difficulty focusing, to a decreased awareness of one's surroundings, to a generalized inability to engage with society at large."

*snip*

"Among current top-level Madden players, the vast majority suffered from profound personality and mood disorders," said Annette Crowley, an IBIR research fellow. "Our participants displayed irritability when presented with even the simplest commands--for example, to stand up from the couch or to interact with their own children for a while."

*snip*

"Today's brand of Madden football is far different from the game of 20 years ago," said 34-year-old Dan Doyle, a former player turned safety advocate. "The style of play is much faster and far more aggressive. After 16 weeks of punishing games, you can see it in the dazed, glassy looks in the players' eyes. It's like they're not even there."

"These men--boys, really--have no idea what they're doing to themselves," he added.

Very funny. Read the whole thing.

On a more serious note, it's also worth reading a bit about former CFL QB Matt Dunigan's story with real football-related concussion injuries and the effect it's had on his life.

From The Toronto Star, CFL legend Dunigan faced tough choice in concussion crusade.

Matt Dunigan calls it the hardest thing he's ever had to do.

Harder than flinging his body at opposing linebackers for 14 years. Harder than leading the Toronto Argonauts to a Grey Cup victory with a fractured collarbone. Harder than facing the fact that after 12 diagnosed concussions, his stellar football career was over.

For the Canadian Football League legend, those tasks pale in comparison to making the painful decision to take his son Dolan out of football, while believing he had the potential to be even better than his father.

More like this