Hat tip to Timothy Sandefur for this link to all the other disclaimers we could put in school textbooks. Brilliant.
And here is Dan Ray’s suggestion for a disclaimer to the gravity disclaimer:
If you intend to experiment with your childrens’ lives using the theory of gravity as you are willing to do with their education using the theory of evolution, you should first acquaint yourself with the principle of deceleration. This principle posits that a relatively smaller mass accelerating toward a larger mass will, upon contacting that larger mass, rapidly decelerate. The rapidly decelerating mass, if theretofore living, may thus end up in a theoretical state sometimes referred to as dead. See the death theory disclaimer.