Dispatches from the Creation Wars

First it was Jerry Falwell publicly claiming that Tinky Winky was gay; then a bunch of “pro-family” groups actually claimed that the animated movie A Shark’s Tale was encouraging kids to be transvestites; now it’s James Dobson’s turn, taking aim at Spongebob Squarepants. His spokesman says that a new video by the We Are Family Foundation, featuring about 100 cartoon characters dancing to the song We Are Family to encourage tolerance and caring for one another, is “an insidious means by which the organisation is manipulating and potentially brainwashing kids.”

Yeah, what could be more insidious than encouraging kids to be tolerant and caring? Come on, what’s next, loving their neighbor? Turning the other cheek? Why, that would be downright Christ-like and we can’t have that, can we? The video, it should be added, doesn’t even mention homosexuality, or sexuality at all. It was created after 9/11 by Nile Rodgers (a brilliant musician, songwriter and producer, by the way. He was the force behind a lot of great albums, most notably Steve Winwood’s Higher Love) to help urge people to think beyond the easy stereotypes that allow us to demonize people we see as Them and, ultimately, to do things like flying airplanes into buildings and kill innocent people. How horrible! How insidious!

As a side note, is there anything more annoying than the religious right’s appropriation of the word “family” for their political agenda? I find it quite offensive. If they’re “pro-family” while supporting laws that break up families by taking children away from gay parents or prevent gay parents from adopting kids who need a family, what does that make me? They act as though only religious conservatives have families, for crying out loud. But the truth is that they’re not pro-family, their only pro-families that look like theirs. Any other kind of family is awful and must be done away with. “Family values”, as Gore Vidal noted twenty years ago, is nothing more than a code phrase that means “get the fags”. And in service to that agenda, they’ve even got cartoon characters in their gunsights. I’ll let the We Are Family Foundation have the last word:

WAFF spokesman Mark Barondeso told the newspaper that anyone who thought the video promoted homosexuality “needs to visit their doctor and get their medication increased”.


  1. #1 Dave S.
    January 20, 2005

    In that case they must be positively apoplectic over the fact virtually every sporting event in America has at one time or another used part of Gary Glitter’s (a.k.a. Paul Francis Gadd) 1972 rock anthem “Rock and Roll” to inspire the team.

    The same Gary Glitter who is a convicted pedophile.

    Clearly a vastly more widespread conspiracy than the Absorbent One’s potential influence.

    As I understand it, holding hands is also a tradition for Arab men. Perhaps Spongebob leans more towards Allah than to Mr. Krabs.

  2. #2 Aaron M
    January 20, 2005

    Dave: even George W. Bush is in on the Glitter pedophile agenda!

  3. #3 SharonB
    January 20, 2005

    The end of Western Civilization is at hand!

    Behold the Avatar of Doom: His name is… SpongeBob SquarePants.

    “This is going to be the best day [of destruction] ever!”

  4. #4 raj
    January 20, 2005

    Groups like Dobson’s do things like this when they want to shake down the rubes for cash. I guess they’re hard-up for money these days.

  5. #5 SharonB
    January 20, 2005

    raj wrote: “Groups like Dobson’s do things like this when they want to shake down the rubes for cash. I guess they’re hard-up for money these days.”

    Sigh. One can only wish.

  6. #6 Bill Ware
    January 20, 2005

    I just love this:

    WAFF spokesman Mark Barondeso told the newspaper that anyone who thought the video promoted homosexuality “needs to visit their doctor and get their medication increased”.

    Notice he said, “get their medication increased.”

    This implies that they are on medication to start with. As far as subtlety is concerned, it doesn’t get any better than this.

  7. #7 mist
    January 20, 2005

    Wait… are we saying Spongebob isn’t gay!? I’d have to say he is pretty fruity… but then again I see nothing wrong with that!

    It’s kind of like the Bravo channel on cable. They don’t ever advertise or promote themselves as a Gay channel, but if you look at the programming… well come on, it’s pretty obvious.

    Maybe in a few years, the US won’t be so narrowminded and they can even admit to it *spongebob too if he is*.

  8. #8 Yaoi Huntress Earth
    January 21, 2005

    One thing I find “interesting” is that fundies bitch about harmless cartoons like Spongebob, but have no problem of telling them the story of Jacob and Esau which glamorizes a man who screwed-over his older brother and tricked his dieing, blind father into making him his heir.

  9. #9 SharonB
    January 21, 2005

    This is getting so delicious. Hee-hee.

    All the media have picked up on this, and because Dobson made this comment in such a public forum (a black tie dinner) it is going to be hard for him to deny having said it or being mis-quoted. All he can do thru his spokespeeps is maintain the line that the Great Porous One really, really is a gay icon.

    At last the great majority of Americans can see what arrogant lunatic homophobes these people be.

  10. #10 SharonB
    January 25, 2005

    On the ‘I told you so’ category, the ever-peevish Dobson devotes not ONE, but TWO broadcasts to do damage control on the SpongeBob incident. Drags FOTF V-president and spokes-puppet Tom Minnery and pocket-psychologist Bill Maier into the bail-me-out program. The Saturday Night Live spoof of Dobson really irritated him (I didn’t see it)! Minnery and Maier kissed major patooty to make the boss feel better. What a cult of personality!

    Dobson had to repeat every Katie Couric like attack on him; make over-simplification of others’ point of view….what a thin skinned-hypocrite!

    link: http://www.oneplace.com/Ministries/Focus_on_the_Family/Default.asp
    25, 26 January 2005

  11. #11 F***K Southern Baptist
    February 2, 2005

    FUCK you all the Baptist people who insulted to children about the cartoons. What you think about the prayer chain link? THINK about this? HA HA HA

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