Dispatches from the Creation Wars

Noah’s Flood Caused Global Warming!

So declares this staggeringly stupid article at the Worldnutdaily.

Yes, global temperatures are rising, says a new video documentary, but it’s not because of manmade carbon dioxide gases as former Vice President Al Gore insists.

It’s because Earth has been warming slowly but surely ever since Noah’s Flood 5,000 years ago, says a retired geophysicist and climate researcher in the video.

The retired geophysicist? None other than John Baumbardner from Los Alamos, inventor of the ridiculous “runaway subduction” model of Noah’s flood. It’s really quite amusing that he, of all people, would claim that a flood caused by runaway subduction would cause a rise in temperatures a degree or two a few thousand years later. Why amusing? Because his model has a gigantic heat problem that he conveniently explains away with miracles.

The runaway subduction model posits that the pre-flood ocean floor sunk into the underlying mantle, which then bubbled up massive amounts of magma. In fact, he posits that virtually the entire existing ocean floor on the entire planet was formed this way in a very short period of time. The problem? Heat. We’re talking about 2 billion km3 worth of lava flows, at approximately 1200 degrees C, all being released below the oceans all at once.

As his critics have pointed out, and Baumgardner himself has admitted, the amount of heat and energy released this way would be staggering. We’re talking about 10^28 joules, enough to literally boil off the oceans (so much for the flood) and perhaps even the atmosphere. Naturally, he explains this away by invoking a miracle. But now, apparently, he’s arguing that God poofed away all that excess heat except just enough to cause global warming. I’ll take monumentally idiotic ideas for $1000, Alex.