Dispatches from the Creation Wars

US Mint Dawdles on Trusting God

The Worldnutdaily reports that the US Mint will take as long as a year to get “In God We Trust” moved from the edge to the front of the one dollar presidential commemorative coins. Personally, I’m terrified. That gives God a whole year of wondering whether we trust him, and you know how irritable God gets when we don’t bow and scrape at every opportunity.

I mean, four more presidents will be honored with such coins in 2008 with the message on the edge – James Monroe, John Quincy Adams, Andrew Jackson and Martin Van Buren. Why, I bet Martin Van Buren is rolling in his grave right now at the thought of not having “In God We Trust” tattooed across his forehead. I suggest that in the interim we put up huge billboards, pointed toward the sky, that say “We trust you, God. Please don’t kill us.”

Oh, here’s my favorite part of the article:

The Mint explained when the coins were introduced that it moved the motto from the face of the coins to the thin edge in order to allow for larger portraits of the presidents on the face and the Statue of Liberty on the reverse.

But the public outcry over the “disappearance” of “In God We Trust” proved to be too much for Congress, and a plan introduced by Sen. Sam Brownback, R-Kan., and others made its way into the consolidated spending plan and was approved.

Oh yeah, the public outcry. It was overwhelming. The war in Iraq? Immigration? The collapse of the dollar? Global warming? Small potatoes next to the wailing and gnashing of teeth that accompanied the use of edge lettering on commemorative coins that will only actually be seen by a few bank tellers and a couple dozen coin collecting geeks. Oh, the humanity!