Dispatches from the Creation Wars

Ooh, More Celebrity Endorsements

Ladies and gentlemen, the battle of the blowhard has-beens is heating up. Sylvester Stallone, on the eve of releasing his latest pathetic attempt to remain relevant, Rambo: First Prostate Exam, has endorsed John McCain. Take that, Chuck Norris. There’s only one way to settle this: steel cage match to the death, Rocky vs Walker, Texas Ranger. Geritol would love the sponsorship rights. We could have them do some sort of acting competition, but the two men combined have all the emotional range of Terri Schaivo (thank you, Nick DiPaolo).