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brayton_headshot_wre_1443.jpg Ed Brayton is a journalist, commentator and speaker. He is the co-founder and president of Michigan Citizens for Science and co-founder of The Panda's Thumb. He has written for such publications as The Bard, Skeptic and Reports of the National Center for Science Education, spoken in front of many organizations and conferences, and appeared on nationally syndicated radio shows and on C-SPAN. Ed is also a Fellow with the Center for Independent Media and the host of Declaring Independence, a one hour weekly political talk show on WPRR in Grand Rapids, Michigan.(static)

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« Converting Dead Mormons | Main | Heywood Challenges Huckabee »

How Would Jesus Drive?

Posted on: December 7, 2008 9:09 AM, by Ed Brayton

The San Antonio Express News reports:

A speeding pickup rear-ended a woman's sedan on the South Side on Friday morning and sheriff's officials say the driver said it was Jesus' will because the other motorist was not "driving like a Christian."

The bizarre incident that shut down southbound U.S. 281 above the Medina River happened about 7:25 a.m.

"He just said God said she wasn't driving right, and she needed to be taken off the road," said Lt. Kyle Coleman of the Bexar County Sheriff's Office...

Schwab told first responders at the scene that "the other vehicle was not driving like a Christian and it was Jesus' will for him to punish the car," according to the release.

I think this is taking "God is my co-pilot" a bit far.

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Comments

1

Let me guess. Alcohol and/or another intoxicant was involved.

Posted by: Esteleth | December 7, 2008 9:54 AM

2

"I think this is taking "God is my co-pilot" a bit far."

From a Christian point of view he needs to change seats.
Yuk, yuk.

Posted by: Thumper600 | December 7, 2008 10:37 AM

3

"God is my copilot" means "I am God's pilot".
Works for me.

Posted by: Rodney | December 7, 2008 10:42 AM

4

Let me guess. Alcohol and/or another intoxicant was involved.

The first question is, of course, is "stupid" intoxicating. Given some of the actions of extremely religious people, I would have to give that question a tentative yes. Then we have to ask, does "stupid" qualify for DUI? If it does, I know a lot of law enforcement haven't been doing their job. ;o)

Posted by: dogmeatib | December 7, 2008 10:52 AM

5

Ah, but how do we know that Schwab is a REAL Christian & would know how a REAL Christian drives?

Posted by: Robert Jase | December 7, 2008 10:55 AM

6

A speeding pickup ...

Both the pilot and co-pilot appear to need to pay more attention to their instruments (as well as the surrounding environs).

Posted by: blf | December 7, 2008 11:09 AM

7

It sounds like Schwab might be hearing voices, which I would have thought was one of the symptoms of schizophrenia. I'm not a medical professional by any stretch of the imagination, but I hope he gets back on his meds, and soon.

Posted by: Shawn Smith | December 7, 2008 11:39 AM

8

Lt. Kyle Coleman of the Bexar County Sheriff's office quoted one of his (alleged) offenders as saying: "He just said God said she [the woman run off the road] wasn't driving right, and she needed to be taken off the road..."
It seems cruel to mock the mentally defective or ill ...
BUT if 'Jesus' was telling him to drive dangerously would that be an acceptable defense? - curiously DJ

Posted by: DingoJack | December 7, 2008 12:04 PM

9

Badly, I would guess. Holes in the hands would make stick shifts a bitch, and the holes in the feet would make emergency stops a no-no. The crown of thorns would rip the roof liner. On the other hand if he ran anyone over he'd be able to raise them Lazarus-like. Unless they had teh gay then he'd reverse over them.

Posted by: Peter | December 7, 2008 12:15 PM

10

Good example of "inshallah". Maybe it was an ecumenical bridge to Muslims.

Posted by: Ex-drone | December 7, 2008 12:53 PM

11

"Let me guess. Alcohol and/or another intoxicant was involved."

The evidence points to a particularly potent (yet legal) opiate.

Posted by: MH | December 7, 2008 5:09 PM

12

American foreign ploicy in microcosm. It will be so nice when Obama (please God!) boots the last of these people out.

Posted by: Paul Murray | December 7, 2008 6:25 PM

13

A year or so ago, I saw a car that had clearly been in more than one accident sporting a, "Relax, God's in control!" bumper sticker. My first thought was that maybe they were taking it a little too literally.

Posted by: Troublesome Frog | December 7, 2008 8:10 PM

14

It has been my impression that the more professions of faith affixed to the car, the worse it is driven. I know, could be a touch of confirmation bias, but I've tried to be objective.

I've proposed to the EvolveFish folks that they make a sticker which says "WJDLT - Would Jesus Drive Like That?"

Posted by: Pieter B | December 7, 2008 8:17 PM

15

ROFL.

Voices told me to run that lady off the road.

Posted by: tincture | December 7, 2008 9:08 PM

16

God is the copilot. Jesus is just in charge of the weapons systems.

Posted by: kehrsam | December 7, 2008 9:24 PM

17

In the comments, it's said that he's mentally ill and has done this before, but the family hasn't been able to get help to keep him off the road or on his meds. Apparently, he's done this before.

What's ironic, though, is that the sheriff concludes that since nobody was seriously injured, God must have been watching. Well, duh. He was watching from the passenger seat of this guy's car!

Posted by: Alison | December 7, 2008 9:26 PM

18

This is simple.

I drank beer and crashed the car.

This is God's Will.

The other driver was anti-God's Will, so the crash was pre-ordained by God.

I think she was a homo.

Why else crash into her, huh, huh?

Posted by: kamaka | December 7, 2008 10:38 PM

19

CARMAGEDDON!!!1!

Posted by: David Marjanović | December 8, 2008 5:08 AM

20

David - At least this guy didn't pickup the Springs-o-Death and Electro-Kill powerups, gone down the hill, into the shopping mall (sidewards) [CRASH! SPROINGGG! ZAP!]
THAT would have been carnage. - :) DJ
PS: Did this guy have plastic Jesus on the dashboard of his car? No wonder he was pissed, that really futzes with the radio reception (or so I've heard).

Posted by: DingoJack | December 8, 2008 6:48 AM

21

Wow! I'm surprised at all of you! Not one person mentioned Carrie Underwood's "Jesus Take the Wheel" as a possible song being played on this guy's radio at the time?

For shame.

Posted by: llDayo | December 8, 2008 10:29 AM

22

Did anyone notice that the guy from the Sheriff's Department then says, "God must have been with them"?

It's catching.

Posted by: Kristine | December 8, 2008 11:30 AM

23

He must have heard about some of the new car models that are in planing right now namely the Jesus Christler Stigmata Sedan - it runs on Faithinol.

http://aredant.blogspot.com/2005/11/spaghetti-ex-machina.html

Posted by: Rev barky | December 8, 2008 12:20 PM

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