Dispatches from the Creation Wars

That Commie Pinko National Review

Stop me if you’ve heard this one before:

Conservative publication/leader says birthers are wrong.

Wingnuts go apeshit and denounce that conservative publication/leader as French-speaking, terrorist-loving, cheese-eating surrender monkeys who hate God and probably eat arugula too.

In this case, it’s the National Review, whose editors effectively squashed all this birther bullshit in a recent column:

The fundamental fiction is that Obama has refused to release his “real” birth certificate. This is untrue. The document that Obama has made available is the document that Hawaiian authorities issue when they are asked for a birth certificate. There is no secondary document cloaked in darkness, only the state records that are used to generate birth certificates when they are requested.

If one applies for a United States passport, the passport office will demand a birth certificate. It defines this as an official document bearing “your full name, the full name of your parent(s), date and place of birth, sex, date the birth record was filed, and the seal or other certification of the official custodian of such records.” The Hawaiian birth certificate President Obama has produced–the document is formally known as a “certificate of live birth”–bears that information. It has been inspected by reporters, and several state officials have confirmed that the information in permanent state records is identical to that on the president’s birth certificate–which is precisely what one expects, of course, since the state records are used to generate those documents when they are requested. In other words, what President Obama has produced is the “real” birth certificate of myth and lore. The director of Hawaii’s health department and the registrar of records each has personally verified that the information on Obama’s birth certificate is identical to that in the state’s records, the so-called vault copy. Given that fact, we are loath even to engage the fanciful notion that President Obama was born elsewhere, contrary to the information on his birth certificate, but we note for the record that his mother was a native of Kansas, whose residents have been citizens of the United States for a very long time, and whose children are citizens of the United States as well.

Freepers, are you ready for your closeup?

A. It’s not a fantasy. Why doesn’t Chairman Zero show us the BC and just make us look bad, eh faux conservatives??

Why did he issue an executive order his first day in office sealing all his records, college, birth, everything! You brown nose clowns over there aren’t curious about any of this?

B. Mebbie Bambi WAS born here.
Whithout SEEING THE DAMN CERTIFICATE we will never know, WILL WE?
Am I supposed to take him ON FAITH?
Not hardly.
At the VERY LEAST, there is something on Bambi’s BC, or collich applications, or grant applications, or transcripts, or other stuff (ALL SEALED) Bambi does NOT want us to see.
I WON’T LET THIS GO AWAY–NEITHER SHOULD YOU!

C. Um “inspected by several reports” HORSE$HIT! That would be against Hawaiian Law AND reports are not document experts. No Sale!

D. it is all part of the same web of lies that the POSOTUS is fabricating. This Kenyan buttwipe needs to realize he may or may not be legaly the president….but if he tries to touch the constitution with his criminal touch (he did promise to obey and protect and follow the constitution) he will be in a world of hurt….and wind up losing states to secession, and where that will follow.

My favorite was this:

Isn’t Factcheck.org a Soros shell anyway?

Which was answered by another ignoramus:

It’s Annenburg Factheck. You know, Annenburg that Obeyme and Ayres worked for?

Actually, Factcheck.org is funded by the Annenberg’s. They are very prominent Republican contributors and supporters. I mean, they’re obviously commie pinko bastards for not realizing that Obama is a secret Muslim illegal alien.