Dispatches from the Creation Wars

Halloween is Eeeeevil

Halloween is my favorite holiday of the year. It’s also one that the serious wingnuts go crazy about – which may well be why it’s my favorite holiday. The CBN website has one of the funniest anti-Halloween screeds I’ve ever seen from a “prophet” named Kimberly Daniels (seriously, her bio actually says she is a “recognized prophetic voice” – recognized by the same credulous ignorami who think Pat Robertson can leg press 2000 pounds and that he can pray away hurricanes).

Get ready for some weapons grade crazy:

During this period demons are assigned against those who participate in the rituals and festivities. These demons are automatically drawn to the fetishes that open doors for them to come into the lives of human beings. For example, most of the candy sold during this season has been dedicated and prayed over by witches.

I do not buy candy during the Halloween season. Curses are sent through the tricks and treats of the innocent whether they get it by going door to door or by purchasing it from the local grocery store. The demons cannot tell the difference.

At what point, exactly, do these witches “pray over” candy? At the factory? In the wholesale warehouses? At the store level?

The danger of Halloween is not in the scary things we see but in the secret, wicked, cruel activities that go on behind the scenes. These activities include:

* Sex with demons
* Orgies between animals and humans
* Animal and human sacrifices
* Sacrificing babies to shed innocent blood
* Rape and molestation of adults, children and babies
* Revel nights
* Conjuring of demons and casting of spells
* Release of “time-released” curses against the innocent and the ignorant.

Okay, I gotta know where this woman parties for Halloween. I’ve been to a lot of Halloween parties and I’ve never seen any of these things. I must be hanging out with the wrong crowd, man.