According to wingnut whacko James Pinkerton, nut case columnist for Newsday, at least one war is going well, these days: the war against The War on Christmas:
So Christmas has survived yet another year.
Yes, there has been a war on Christmas, fought by a few lefty lawyers who managed to buffalo some multiculturalist bureaucrats and politicians. But it’s been a losing war:
First, and most obviously, there’s the steadfast religiosity of the American people; polls routinely show that 90 percent of Americans believe in God. Secular progressives have done their best to knock the faith out of people, but it doesn’t seem to be working. (Newsday)
Mr. Pinkerton (Pinkerton? Hmmm. Sounds communist or maybe gay) is treading on very dangerous ground, however. He almost sounds like he might believe in evolution:
Part of the problem is that those who are most inclined to accept “modernity” are oftentimes the least inclined to have children. So “converts” to atheism have a way of disappearing without heirs, while those who stick with their faith, including the injunction to go forth and multiply, are more likely to have kids who inherit at least some degree of devotion.
Atheism is heritable. Who knew? The arguments that follow are even more cogent. Pinkerton points to a worldwide reacton to the “self-declared forces of enlightenment and progress” (with enemies like that, who needs friends?), a cause for celebration:
Around the world, conservative, even reactionary, religions are on the rise. In India, for example, Hindu fundamentalism is gaining strength, as Indians react to their neighboring Islamic countries and also to the increase in commercial interaction with the West. In China, millions are moving toward Christianity, while the government is pushing a neo-Confucianism. Africa is increasingly divided between the competing dynamisms of Christian and Muslim evangelism.
And the Middle East – well, Americans know about that. Islamic fundamentalism has been the guiding energy behind suicide bombers and al-Qaida, and we can bet there’s an even bigger religious revival occurring in Iraq, as both Shia and the Sunni look to heaven for inspiration.
If that’s the climate around the world, it makes sense that Christianity would grow in its homelands, too. If others clutch their holy books, Americans will respond by reaching for their own comfortable Bible.
It’s a little hard to parse this. Is he saying American Christians are reacting like other fundamentalist religions in a backlash to “enlightment and progress,” or American Christians are reacting to rival fundamentalists with their own fundamentalism? Probably the latter, because he follows it with his own version of what religious “tolerance” means in good old fashioned American Christianity:
So we might consider the reaction to the recent announcement of a Muslim African-American, U.S. Rep. Keith Ellison (D-Minn.), that he would hold his hand on a Quran when he is sworn in as a member of the 110th Congress. Rep. Virgil Goode (R-Va.) wrote a letter to his constituents in response, warning that if Americans “don’t wake up and adopt the Virgil Goode position on immigration there will likely be many more Muslims elected to office and demanding the use of the Quran.”
Liberals and open-border advocates were outraged, of course, but you might ask yourself: Do you want more Muslims moving to America? Do you look forward to more Muslims in Congress – you know, with access to classified national security information, including counter-terrorism plans? If the answer is “no,” then it’s likely that you are moving closer to Goode’s immigration position – and that, in addition, the sturdy observance of Christmas looks like a better and better bulwark.
So now we know The War on the the War on Christmas is part of the Global War on Terrorism.
And just as real. Send in the troops. Pinkerton has already sent in the clowns.