Dear influenza virus:
You owe the Council of Europe and a number of others an apology. They are angry — and rightly so — that you didn’t kill many more people and wreak havoc in every country on the globe. You could have. Other influenza viruses killed a lot of people, especially when there was no natural immunity in the population. As far as anyone can tell you aren’t any different. When you surprised us there was no effective vaccine. You had the perfect opportunity and you blew it. As for the vaccine we got later, it’s no excuse. I read in the British Medical Journal the vaccine might not work. “Might not” is the same as “doesn’t” when it’s in a big time medical journal like BMJ. I wish I’d known that before I got vaccinated. What a waste. You didn’t even make me sick.
So don’t bother me again. I’m not interested in hearing how good your qualifications for the job are. Too late for that. We’ve seen how you performed. I’ll grant you your family has a good track record, but it’s only “what have you done to us lately” that counts. Even if you were much more efficient in killing young and healthy people, it’s the bottom line that’s important, and the bottom line is that you didn’t live up to your illustrious 1918 parents in total killing power. You didn’t live up to expectations this time so why should we expect you to ever live up to them? You were just like ordinary carpet bombing, not a nuclear holocaust.
I know I write for everyone not killed by you, as well as for the Council of Europe, that we are very, very disappointed.