Internet Cultural Literacy Moment

I grew up with the internet.

This is my life.

I regularly make internet culture references that others are too old/young to get (which is why I like hanging out with WoWers, even though I dont play– they get my jokes :P).

So I thought I would do myself and my readers a favor by posting on the next internet phenomenon, so you dont accidentally miss it… THE CRUSADE BEGINS!!

ALLIGATOR!

SPARKLE CHEST!

GUITAR!

BLOW UP BOAT!

DAGGER!

SPINNY CRYSTAL THINGIE!

Love has enemies…

Chris Dane Owens– My album is being mixed now and will be up on Itunes and on CD in February. A letterboxed DVD version of the SHINE video will also be included on the CD. Thanks for the fantatsic support. I am very, very greatful to everyone. CDO

Chris Dane Owens–Yes.. I am planning on doing 2 more videos to continue telling this story. I have begun storyboarding the next vid already… Thanks for the support.. You rock!!”

Comments

  1. #1 Alan Kellogg
    December 18, 2008

    Pornstache! :)

  2. #2 Justin Wagner
    December 18, 2008

    That video left me speechless. Well, almost. I managed to whisper “For….the….win” very slowly.

  3. #3 Justin Wagner
    December 18, 2008

    This totally reminded me of the Billy Ocean video for Loverboy.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBXDavOyfEg

  4. #4 Nately
    December 18, 2008

    “I am planning on doing 2 more videos to continue telling this story.”

    There was an actual story there?

  5. #5 ERV
    December 19, 2008

    If you watch it 20 more times, youll get it. I mean, first I laughed, but around viewing #15… it all became clear…

    Im not kidding.

    Hes on a trip or quest or something. He meets cute girl. They, like, totally make out. But then Dr. Doom comes up and tries to steal Chick. Dude fights him off. YAY! No! Dude has to finish his quest to get a cools sword from the dark triplet sister chicks, chick stays with blonde triplet sister chicks. Dude gets cool sword. Sisters pissed. Kill him in a sea storm. Dude goes to heaven. Blonde chick brings him back to life. Dark triplet chicks are pissed, try to kill him with fire and shit. Dr. Doom isnt happy either. Epic battle ensues, involving dragons, alligators, daggers, and things blowing up. But its okay, Dude has friends. Battle is over, chick finds out Dude is alive. They go to a party. Then they get married. Blonde chick makes them fireworks.

    BUT THEN DUDE HAS TO GO ON ANOTHER QUEST!

  6. #6 Brian
    December 19, 2008

    FSM, that was, like, every fantasy-based music video from the 1980s combined into one. (Only nobody had that kind of CGI in the 1980s.)

    I’ll stop twitching in a minute. I just need some cranial bleach.

  7. #7 SteveC
    December 19, 2008

    The “production values” on this are insane, but, these people are not adults.

    And the metal guitarist in me wanted to garrote the robot guitar player with an E-string. Either play it metal, or don’t, but this half-hearted shit has to die.

  8. #8 Bob O'H
    December 19, 2008

    Yes, Brian. These youngsters of the interweb generation don’t remember the 80s, so it’s all retro. I bet they miss the Dallas reference in the video too.

  9. #9 Becca
    December 19, 2008

    Thanks for clarifying the story… I’ll just skip watching this 18 more times. It doesn’t amuse me. I expect more… something. in my internet phenomenons. Silliness? Melikes llamas. And kenya. And OKgo.

    Me loves David Bowie in Labyrinth, but that took a while. This has a similar feel at moments, maybe I’ll get it later…

  10. #10 The Chimp's Raging Id
    December 19, 2008

    Man, that was baaad. I don’t think I could stomach watching it another 20 times.

    If you want to pack in a load of retro references in a music video, at least do it properly.

  11. #11 RoaldFalcon
    December 19, 2008

    Yesterday, the Internet was all “Happy Monkey”. Today it’s this.

    This is why it’s important to not miss a moment on the Internet.

  12. #12 Paul Lundgren
    December 19, 2008

    THAT was the corniest thing I’ve seen since Krull. And the sad thing is, you know those actors jumped at the chance to be in a “music video” instead of making commercials for toothpaste, or whatever.

  13. #13 Doug Alder
    December 19, 2008

    On top of all the other complaints already mentioned – it’s too bad that he can’t sing worth s*&t either. All flash [pun intended] no substance.

  14. #14 Paul Lundgren
    December 19, 2008

    Oh, and Abbie, it’s a really boring day here at work, so thanks for giving me something with which to occupy myself for a little while with that “history of the Internet” site.

  15. #15 Doubting Foo
    December 19, 2008

    I wonder if he plays WOW.

  16. #16 Blake Stacey
    December 19, 2008

    At long last we can answer the question, “What if they’d had computers in the 1980s?”

  17. #17 windy
    December 19, 2008

    everything is explained!

    My character is part of the witches kingdom, which is the second kingdom. I’m actually part of their army and an enforcer, a general, if you will. I meet that young lady Arra who is secretly being trained by the angels and they hand her a book. That book is the book of golden symbols which can only be understood by the spirit, by the living soul. She’s being trained secretly to be the queen of this realm, to overthrow the forces of darkness. My character actually meets her and falls in love with her and decides to leave the dark side, so he has an epiphany.

    Bob:

    Yes, Brian. These youngsters of the interweb generation don’t remember the 80s, so it’s all retro. I bet they miss the Dallas reference in the video too.

    Yeah, maybe the internet needs a ’80s cultural literacy moment rather than the other way around. An episode of Robin of Sherwood would be a good a brain cleanser after this.

  18. #18 Blake Stacey
    December 19, 2008

    Those who do not remember the 1980s are doomed to repeat them?

  19. #19 Ty
    December 19, 2008

    “Those who do not remember the 1980s are doomed to repeat them?”

    Please, no, no more fluorescent yellow stretch pants. No more.

  20. #20 Brian
    December 19, 2008

    Oh crap. I barely survived the 1980s the first time round.

  21. #21 Eric Saveau
    December 19, 2008

    Those who do not remember the 1980s are doomed to repeat them?

    [WW]

    It is time for a fool to pray for The A-Team.

    And I pity the fool.

    [/WW]

    Okay, that was unfair; Wally never gets even that “close” to clever…

  22. #22 BGT
    December 19, 2008

    I think Mike Watt’s album needs an updated version of “Against the 70′s”…..

    I like the video work, but the music itself is an example of the worst canned music from the 80′s. It just isn’t inspiring.

    I need to go listen to some Replacements and Husker Du to regain my sanity. Peter Schilling as a musician has a lot over this gentleman (and that is after ripping off David Bowie).

  23. #23 BGT
    December 19, 2008

    aaaaahhhh……Bowie’s Ashes to Ashes helps to cleanse the sonic palette….

  24. #24 H.H.
    December 19, 2008

    My favorite part is around the 2:56 mark where he makes that ridiculous leap over a guy’s head and onto a pillar–all while staring directly into the camera. I guess he wanted his face visible the entire time so everyone would know that he did his own stunts. Look, ma! I got a green screen!

  25. #25 SteveWH
    December 20, 2008

    Someone needs to do a “literal” version of that video, stat. Until then . . . http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HE9OQ4FnkQ

  26. #26 Dustin
    December 20, 2008

    O_O

  27. #27 Dr Benway
    December 20, 2008

    dood needs a sandwich

  28. #28 Dr Benway
    December 21, 2008

    lol SteveWH, that Aha pipewrench guy takes me back. The 80s were so awesome.