America’s Worst Colleges

It’s that time of year again! That most worthless of weekly news mags, U. S. News and World Report, has just published its annual list of America’s Best Colleges. As usual, they tinkered with their ranking system again, for the sole purpose of fiddling with the order, thereby creating some news. Will Princeton or Harvard be number one? Yawn.

Happily, Radar magazine has come out with a far more useful feature: America’s Worst Colleges. They explain:

This year, U.S. News & World Report announced that their new college rankings system would involve “substantial changes in methodology.” And now, after much hyperventilating, the 2008 results are finally in.

We’ll save you some time: Penn jumps from seventh to fifth! Dartmouth gets squeezed out of the top ten! Identifying America’s best colleges is about as exciting and useful as naming your favorite luxury sedan (Audi). For the millions of students whose SAT results place them south of Swarthmore, identifying the schools to avoid at all costs seems like a far more valuable service. And so we present Radar’s exhaustive, semi-scientific guide to the most substandard colleges in America.

It’s a very amusing list. Go have a look, and don’t ignore the comments!


  1. #1 SLC
    August 25, 2007

    Is Liberty Un. really worse then Regent College(owned by Pat Robertson)? Or Bob Jones Un.?

  2. #2 Jason Rosenhouse
    August 25, 2007

    As I recall, the folks at Radar did say that competition was fierce in that category.

  3. #3 Josh
    August 25, 2007

    Let me just say to whatever **** pansy wrote this review that he has no **** idea what he is talking about. Drugs, alcohol, sex, and violence, in a beautiful campus setting, makes for pretty damn good education in my book.

    Good to see that we Americans have the right educational priorities.

  4. #4 Tegumai Bopsulai, FCD
    August 27, 2007

    I didn’t even know the Moonies had bought a university.

  5. #5 Reynold Hall
    August 31, 2007

    Well, with Regent, Liberty, and Bob Jones there, we know that the category is legitimate.

  6. #6 Kevin
    August 31, 2007

    Roar, Lions Roar

    When the bold teams of old wore the blue and white,
    Deeds of dame made their name here at old Columbia,
    Nowadays, we can praise old sluts again,
    Hear the Lion roar his pride,
    While the men of Morningside,
    Follow the blue and white to victory!
    Roar, Lion, Roar
    your mother’s a fucking whore!
    Fight on to boink her evermore
    While the sons of Knickerbocker
    Rally ’round Columbia, Columbia!
    Shouting her name forever
    Roar, Lion, Roar
    For her spread eagle on the Hudson shore!

  7. #7 David Mangu
    June 13, 2008

    I think Liberty University is one of the worst colleges in america hands down.

  8. #8 Stacy
    January 6, 2009

    I read Radar’s 2008 list of Worst Colleges, and there was one that was missing: The University of Wyoming. It’s acceptance rate is literally over 98%, and the school itself has so many faults that any pros about the school get lost in it’s downfalls. And the academics are very sub-standard. It’s an affordable school, but if you go there because of the low costs, you are sacrificing the quality of your education. Maybe it’s too rural to be included in Radar’s list?

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