You might want to take along this song sheet of Atheist Christmas Carols.
Including such soon-to-be classics as "No joy to the world!," "Silent Night, Normal Night," "Hark the Herald Hallucinations Sing," and "O Come All ye Faithless."
And many many more.
... here.
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Silliness. No, no ... stupidity.
But have a merry Christmas anyhow ...
Marooned: "Christmas Carols for the Mentally Disturbed"
1. Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear?
2. Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Kings Disorientated Are
3. Dementia - I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas
4. Narcissistic - Hark The Herald Angels Sing About Me
5. Manic - Deck the Halls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and...
6. Paranoid - Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me
7. Borderline Personality Disorder - Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire
8. Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why
9. Attention Deficit Disorder - Silent Night, Holy, ooh look at the froggy - Can I have a chocolate? Why is France so far away?
10. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells.
If I go it's usually to the Longboat Road Runners' Jingle Bell run, where a bunch of runners in Santa hats run around downtown, stopping every half-block or so to annoy people with out Christmas carols.
People who listen are more common than those who slink away, fingers in ears. But it's been a few years.