i-156a22bedc9b029b6a5325970648fc0c-AbuPepper.jpgThe Jalapeno Pepper recently detained in McAllen Texas on suspicion of infecting over one thousand Americans with Salmonella has reportedly been transported to an ‘offshore’ facility for further questioning. The pepper’s lawyers filed a brief in a Washington DC court claiming that the pepper was taking a bum wrap, but prosecution argued that the wrap was actually a burrito and that the government had every right to detain the pepper given the grave nature of its alleged crime.

Meanwhile this photograph has surfaced of what appears to be the McAllen Pepper being led down a messy hallway by a uniformed security guard. Or something.

FDA officials remain at a loss to explain. Anything.


  1. #1 Mike Haubrich, FCD
    July 23, 2008

    I like this bit in the comment thread over at Effect Measure:

    I say crush the pepper. Make it break. No mercy. Lock it up in the facilities at Guacamole Bay. (Gickmo, to people who know military-speak.) — Mike H.

    I think they should water-sink the little bugger. Strap it into a colander, stem-down, and drench it with a hand-sprayer. Then show it a food processor and a bowl of salsa. That’ll make it talk! — Julie S.

    Don’t you think we should have several months of debate first, to decide who should be the lead agency? DHS, DOD, USDA, HHS?

    Maybe it should depend on whether it is a mild pepper, a medium pepper, or a really hot pepper..