Coleman Campaign Admits They Are Stoopit

“The actions today by the Canvassing Board can only be described as confusing to us.”

Coleman’s chief lawyer, Fritz Knaak, has filed papers to stop 133 votes in a Franken-leaning section of Minneapolis … mainly college students … from being counted. Why? Because he is too stupid to understand the not so complicated situation…

“While advocates for the Franken Campaign stood outside with signs reminiscent of Florida in 2000, what we now have before us is a situation in which there now exist essentially, more than 87 different standards for how ballots will be included in the so-called fifth pile.

“However, as one State Canvassing Board member pointed out today, it’s no longer just one fifth pile. It’s a fifth pile with subpiles from A to Z with no uniform standard for determining which, if any, legally rejected absentee ballots ought to be included in a pile.


OK, let me explain to the dumbass lawyer. The law in Minnesota is simple. You do what you can do to determine voter intent. If the ballot is otherwise legal, you figure out the intent and you count it.

The state canvassing board decided, earlier today, to count the 133 ballots that were previously counted by machine but apparently stolen by a Coleman supporter (ooops, did I say that out loud?) or lost or something. And, they decided to allow counties look at absentee ballots that were rejected inappropriately.

This is not so hard to understand. But there may be a problem with understanding anything that is not wearing a skirt and seen through the fog of cigar smoke and liquor in the back room of some restaurant in downtown Minneapolis by the Coleman campaign. Ooops, did I say that out loud too? My goodness.

The wit. It kills me.