I read the news today, oh boy.

Between ten and fifteen people who’s skin is not pale-pinkish white have been shot by Swedish extremists, mirroring the recent election in Sweden of numerous strongly anti-non-white officials*. The most hard to spot stealthy submarine in the British Navy has become the most visible and talked about naval vessel.* Biggest news story I didn’t notice this week: The Juan Williams, Bill O’Really, NPR and Fox News WTF.*

Comments

  1. #1 Doug
    October 22, 2010

    The sub that has run aground is called the “Astute”, which just makes my day.

  2. #2 Greg Laden
    October 22, 2010

    That’s the name they let us know about. I assume it has a “secret sub” name as well.

    To get your secret sub name, first write down the name off the British Monarch in power at the time of your favorite historical era, then write down the best single word to describe the object depicted by the most recently seen pair of earings or neck pendant. Then, pick a number from one to 15. That is your Secret Sub Name.

  3. #3 NewEnglandBob
    October 22, 2010

    Since I went on the Paleo diet, I no longer have boxes of cereal, so I no longer have a source for a decoder ring. Can I buy one at Target or Home Depot or Walmart?

  4. #4 lawguy
    October 22, 2010

    I am willing to claim to be afraid of the minority of your choice for a mere $1,750,000.00 a year. Tell FOX.

  5. #5 Doug
    October 22, 2010

    HMS HenryHummingbird3?

  6. #6 sailor
    October 22, 2010

    Anyone who has worked with NPR or any other company for more than 10 years should get more than a telephone dismissal. On the other hand since he has a multimillion dollar contract with fox I am shedding no tears.

  7. #7 jon livesey
    October 22, 2010

    Before you chortle so hard that you swallow your wheaties, try looking up USS San Fransisco.

  8. #8 MadScientist
    October 22, 2010

    The Swedes are fucked – they’re using “profilers” – the criminals can rest assured that they will not be caught.

    I can just imagine what the profilers will say:
    “The assailant is white with blonde hair and has a gun.”

    Now in the USA the same profilers would say:
    “The assailant is black, between the ages of 18 and 48, has a gun, smokes pot, listens to Marilyn Manson, and watched ClockWork Orange once.”

  9. #9 Doug
    October 22, 2010

    It’s not the fact that the sub ran aground that makes it funny. Navy ships ran aground all the time. It’s hardly newsworthy. A friend of mine was once relieved of command of a destroyer because he ran it aground. Of course, this is the same guy who once mistook an aircraft carrier for Point Loma on his radar, so I’m guessing the navy made the right call on that one.

    What makes it funny is that the ship was named “Astute.” It’s like naming your dog “Graceful” and then having it fall down the stairs. It wouldn’t be funny if the dog’s name was San Francisco.

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