You win

If the guy's going to go for an insanity defense in court, I think he's got it made. *shudder*

He might qualify for a Darwin award as well. If the surgery worked, could he at least get a nomination for sincere effort?

I gotta say, the police really went above and beyond the call of duty in trying not to kill him despite his behavior. Throwing handfuls of knives! Nice contrast to all those stories where the family calls 911 because their dementia-suffering granny is wandering around with a potato peeler and they are afraid she is going to hurt herself, only to have her brains blown out by the arriving police.

Crazy Guy Penis Removal is the only sport you can "win" by scoring an own-goal.

OK, that was by far ENTIRELY TOO MUCH INFORMATION

*shudder*

pough wins.

Rosey recounts years back, working as a psychologist on an inpatient ward...running a group with a woman who'd pulled her eyes out a few days before and a man who'd just tried to cut off his penis.....did I doubt my career choice that day? You betcha!!

I know what you're thinking: Did I throw one of my genitals or all of them? Well what do you think? Do you feel lucky...punk?

At that point, there's pretty much nothing the police can do to make the situation worse is there?

In theory, hitting a police officer with such a projectile could qualify as sexual assault: I don't remember any exemption in the law with regard to detached genitalia....

Kinda guy who would bring a knife to a cockfight

Don't you mean a cock to a knifefight? ;-)

I know what you're thinking: Did I throw one of my genitals or all of them? Well what do you think? Do you feel lucky...punk?

He did have a couple of balls left to pitch.

Just keep denying that some people are curing detached genitalia using chelation. You don't have the balls to admit the truth. Spare the rod spoil the child, I always say, that's all the proof I need. Just read the studies by real scientists like Dick Death, Madie Horny, Handy Cutler, Barebacher, etc. You can't continue to erect any more of your limp science and remain detached from the fact that there is a huge organ of evidence that has been covered up by the BVD, F.O.L, etc.

Just keep denying that some people are curing detached genitalia using chelation.

*bursts out laughing*

It's good to see that you can make fun of yourself. :)