Santa Claus will take you to hell…the video

The other day, I mentioned how the ever-warped and evil Westboro Baptist Church wanted in on the Washington State melee in which every religious and antireligion group out there is trying to get a display at the capitol after the state allowed a Christian Nativity scene. Included were the lyrics to a lovely jingle these twisted idiots came up with called Santa Claus Will Take You To Hell.

Ed Brayton may have posted an image of the actual poster that the WBC wanted to display and reported that the State of Washington, deluged with requests for displays, has declared a moratorium on new displays until the government can figure out what to do, but I’ve gone one better. Here’s the video of Fred Phelps’ cult of hateful loonies actually singing the song:

It doesn’t have a good beat, and you can’t dance to it, as evidenced near the end of the video by the clumsy attempt at a chorus line.

This time around, I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry. I realize the WBC is an easy target, but it’s an easy target because it’s about as good an example as there exists for just how badly radical fundamentalist religion can warp people.


  1. #1 sophia8
    December 14, 2008

    This video would be hilarious – if they didn’t involve kids in their madness.

  2. #2 Randall
    December 14, 2008

    If it makes you feel better, even right-wing individuals such as Bill O’Reilly think that the WBC is crazy and should not be allowed to display their sign.

  3. #3 Andrew
    December 14, 2008

    The only reason the kickline doesn’t work is they’re kicking on the downbeat. They should be stepping on the downbeat and kicking on the upbeat.

    I really like the triplets they added in, actually, and think they articulated them well. I just might cover this song in concert, albeit ironically.

  4. #4 J. J. Ramsey
    December 14, 2008

    Where do they get this bizarre idea that Santa would want to rape kids?

  5. #5 Marilyn Mann
    December 14, 2008

    What is the “Westboro Baptist Church”? They don’t sound like any Baptists I know.

  6. #6 Marilyn Mann
    December 14, 2008

    Never mind, I just googled them. They are a bunch of wackos of a particularly loathsome variety.

  7. #7 Joseph C.
    December 14, 2008

    Where do they get this bizarre idea that Santa would want to rape kids?

    It’s all made up, of course. They’re just looking to stir trouble up by attaching their protests to whatever is convenient at the time. There’s no real logic to it. The scam is that they’re a family of mostly lawyers, know the law pretty well, and they hope to sue and cash in every time their 1st Amendment rights are violated.

  8. #8 MarcW
    December 14, 2008

    I really must protest this assertion. In my opinion, wearing an explosive device and detonating it in a crowd of innocent women and children is far, far more warped than anything Phelps and his inbred coterie do. Phelps & Co are hypocrites, in my opinion, for not taking up the sword and emulating their much more sincere brethren in this manner.

    Even if we exclude actual violence, WBC is a good example, certainly, but nothing like the best. That fellow who spent forty years on top of a pole naked a ways back, he was WAY nuttier than these idiots. And that’s just one example.


  9. #9 LL
    December 14, 2008

    This is child abuse…

  10. #10 JStein
    December 14, 2008

    MarcW, I’m with you. Islamic fundamentalists might be nuts, but you definitely can’t call them hypocrites.

    The WBC really should just give a shot at holy wrath and attempt to slaughter all of the non-believers. That’s what god calls for much of the time in the bible (my favorite example of this is Hosea 13:16). Then they could get to meet some of the friends of the soldiers in caskets that they seem so overjoyed about.

    There are nuttier people, to be sure, but these are some of the nuttiest stateside.

  11. #11 D. C. Sessions
    December 14, 2008

    even right-wing individuals such as Bill O’Reilly think that the WBC is crazy and should not be allowed to display their sign.

    Hardly surprising if you think about it.

    For one, O’Reilly is opposed to anyone other than those who agree with him being allowed to express themselves. WBC is just unusual in being to the right of him instead of to the left like almost everyone else.

    For another, WBC does an excellent job of illustrating just how far into batshit country O’Reilly’s positions really are. Let’s give him credit for understanding the negative PR potential.

  12. #12 Michael Fridman
    December 14, 2008

    “you tell the children he is real
    you know that’s just a lie
    to justify your own vile sins
    is the only reason why”

    do i detect a whiff of projection?

  13. #13 DuWayne
    December 14, 2008

    You know, I’ve never been one to claim that religious indoctrination is even akin to child abuse, in spite of my own lingering scars from childhood indoctrination. But if this doesn’t qualify, I really don’t know what would, shy of physically beating them.

  14. #14 Kristjan Wager
    December 14, 2008

    DuWayne, if you haven’t read the article about Phelp’s son, Nate Phelps, I think you should

    Running from hell –
    Growing up in America’s most hated family

    Of course, that story line is a bit of hyperbole. No one outside Kansas knew of the Phelps back when Nate grew up.

  15. #15 Danny
    December 14, 2008

    I thought it was catchy. >_>

  16. #16 Cath the Canberra Cook
    December 14, 2008

    When I first saw that poster, I speculated that someone not related to the WBC had submitted it as a joke. But holy crap, it’s real! That group is living proof of Poe’s law.

  17. #17 Mike Haubrich, FCD
    December 14, 2008

    Even Bill Donohue castigated them for being “Anti-Catholic, Anti-gay.”

  18. #18 Tsu Dho Nimh
    December 14, 2008

    Are you sure that’s not a parody done by atheists?

  19. #19 DuWayne
    December 14, 2008

    Kristjan –

    I haven’t read that article, but I did hear an interview of Nate on NPR (I want to say it was Fresh Air).

    Tsu Dho Nimh –

    All too certain. Phelps is infamous for this kind of vile garbage.

  20. #20 The Science Pundit
    December 14, 2008

    Do they end all their music videos with some brainwashed child parroting one of their hate slogans? I’m curious because I’ve seen them do that before.

  21. #21 Marcus Ranum
    December 15, 2008

    I like the way that they’re overwhelmed so they’ve frozen accepting NEW displays Now that the christians are in the door, etc.

  22. #22 Morgan
    December 15, 2008

    @MarcW: I don’t know, a case could be made. Orac didn’t say that this sort of thing is the worst effect of religion, but “about as good an example as there exists for just how badly radical fundamentalist religion can warp people”. Being whipped up into a killing fervor by your religious beliefs (especially as around in-group/out-group and tribalist/nationalist sentiment) is bad, and has deplorable effects, but it’s the sort of things humans are very prone to and aren’t that hard to push in to. This kind of bizarre exhibitionism, on the other hand, is arguably weirder and an example of a greater warping of minds than “those people are bad and it is virtuous to kill them”.

  23. #23 RedGreenInBlue
    December 17, 2008

    Why don’t they just ditch the protest stunts and concentrate full-time on the parody? It’s much funnier, and they can even sing in tune, which is more than most people in Christmas church services will manage.

    …What’s that you say? They’re not doing this as comedy?

  24. #24 scooter
    December 21, 2008

    This is the craziest shit I have ever seen. We should go in and take the kids out of there and give them a chance and put the adults in jail for child abuse.

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