We’ve seen the Virgin Mary on trees, under a freeway overpass in Chicago, a window in Perth Amboy, NJ, and even in the brain. We’ve seen Jesus himself show up on toast, on a piece of sheet metal, on a potato chip, on a pierogi, on a ceiling tile, and even on a cat. Heck, we’ve even seen Elvis Presley on a rock and Pope John Paul II in a flame.
What could be left?
AN Australian man says the Virgin Mary and baby Jesus have appeared in his lava lamp and ever since the “miracle” his life has been blessed.
The man who identified himself only as John Smith of Sydney has set up a shrine to the lava lamp in his home and also the holymarylamp.com website.
“This is a true, tangible miracle that is not just an optical illusion. It is visible in all directions and permanently frozen in this shape,” he told news.com.au.
“This happened about a year ago and I have kept the lamp hidden since. I now want the world to know of its existence.”
Naturally, since discovering this most holy of miracles, Mr. Smith noted a complete turnaround in his life:
“I had been going through a tough time and was paying for a sign … a divine sign from God that I was not alone and that all would work out fine,” he explains on the website.
“I turned on my brand new lava lamp and watched in awe as the unmistakeable image of the Holy Mary cradling the Baby Jesus appeared.”
The image took his breath away.
“I immediately turned off the lamp and the lava has remained in this position ever since.”
After the revelation of the lava lamp Mr Smith said his life turned around.
“Only a couple of weeks after Holy Mary appeared to me in the lava lamp every facet of my life began to miraculously transform,” he said.
“I met the most incredible woman, my angel here on earth.”
Mr Smith believes there is no doubt that the lava lamp led him to his soul mate who had been praying for a miracle herself on the other side of Sydney.
“Since then we have gotten engaged, phenomenal job offers have come flooding in, money keeps presenting itself and we are blessed by the warmth and love of angels constantly protecting and guiding us.”
Unfortunately, the reporter interviewed a nasty skeptic from the Australian Skeptics, who pointed out that this was nothing more than pareidolia. Obviously, he’s a heathen unbeliever and will not believe it when the inevitable reports of this Holy Lava Lamp curing the ills, even cancer, of believers who gaze upon its wonder start surfacing. And you just know they will start surfacing, probably later this year.
Of course, I always thought that these people must think God, if he exists, to be very, very small indeed if they think he’d go around showing himself in Lava Lamps, potato chips, fried fish, ceilings, and the like. I mean, wouldn’t the creator of the universe have better things to do with his time and powers?