Respectful Insolence

Over the last week or so, I’ve been a bit–shall we say?–dismissive of claims by anti-vaccinationists when they insist that, really, truly, honestly, they aren’t “anti-vaccine,” usually with a wounded, indignant, self-righteous tone. Either that, or they make like the Black Knight in Monty Python and The Holy Grail by demanding the surrender of the public health community, even as limb after limb of their claims have been lopped off by the sword of science, all the while not even realizing how risible it is to demand respect for their views after they have been totally discredited scientifically and continue to suffer the death of a thousand knives with each new well-designed study that comes out and fails to find a link between vaccines and autism. Yet, they demand that we beleie them when they piously assert that they aren’t anti-vaccine.

As I pointed out last week, next week there will be the big Kahuna of yearly quackfests of the anti-vaccine movement, namely AutismOne in Chicago. As part of that quackfest, there will be an anti-vaccine rally in Grant Park on Wednesday, May 26. Truly, it is the confluence between the anti-vaccine movement and the Tea Party anti-government movement in the form of the “health freedom” movement.

And now this “American Rally for Personal Rights” has its own soundtrack:

The American Rally for Personal Rights is pleased to announce that rally speaker Michael Belkin, will for the very first time ever, be performing songs from his upcoming CD at our rally. In 1998, Michael’s daughter died only hours after receiving a required vaccine, sparked by this intensely personal encounter with the negative effects of government mandated vaccines he began a journey of public service which has included providing testimony before Congress, attending vaccine related regulatory sessions and appearing in countless media reports as a vaccine safety advocate.

His journey has found a new path in The Refusers, a musical tribute to the victims (past, present and future) of the government’s misguided mandatory vaccination policy. Inspired by his previous career as a LA session player and recording artist, Michael has brought infectious elements of funk, gospel, rock, and even a touch of punk to this project. Combining this with his pointed lyrics discussing vaccine issues and government-mandated intrusion into our personal lives, The Refusers embodies, in the great American tradition of protest music, a sound that will be heard around the world. With lyrics like “they can keep their flu vaccine” and “a vaccine needle stole my baby away,” this record will have you on your feet shouting “keep your mandates out of my body”!

You think I’m joking? I only wish I were. There are three songs listed there:

  1. Get Your Mandates Out of My Body
  2. Vaccine Gestapo
  3. We Don’t Want Their Flu Vaccine

You can actually download these songs here. Get a load of the lyrics to “Vaccine Gestapo”:

They have swastikas on their shoulders
They’re such patriotic soldiers
They’re like a militia in Montana
They’re a government agency in Atlanta

Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!
Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!

They’re a medical military priesthood
Just like Adolf they preach the greater good
Consciencious objectors are just little snot
Why don’t you quit complaining and go get your shots

Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!
Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!

Can we see your papers
Have you had all your shots?
your papers please, your papers please
Have you had all your shots?

They’re got a one track mind of domination
They say vaccines are your obligation
If a bad reaction turns you into a vegetable,
They’ll sneer and tell you you’re expendable

Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!
Vaccine gestapo! Vaccine gestapo!
Vaccine gestapo!

Let’s just put it this way: The Clash’s immortal classic “The Guns of Brixton,” this ain’t.

I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry after I listened to this song. I also kept holding out hope that The Refusers were some sort of mischievous, clever parody of anti-vaccine nonsense. They aren’t. They’re dead serious. In fact, I was originally going to post these lyrics and ask you, my readers, whether they were real or whether I (or some other mischief-maker) made them up as a parody. Unfortunately, Sullivan beat me to the idea. As Ken Reibel put it, all that’s missing are the tricorner hats and muskets. It’s the soundtrack for an anti-vaccine Tea Party.

As hard as it is to believe, these lyrics are absolutely real and appear to be intended completely sincerely. The Refusers will be performing in Grant Park a mere week from today, leaving me with only two observations.

One: The anti-vaccine movement has degenerated to the point where it is impossible to distinguish real from parody. It’s just like Poe’s law with fundamentalists, only this time with antivaccinationists. If I hadn’t known that The Refusers and “Vaccine Gestapo” were real, I would have had a hard time knowing for sure whether they were real or parody. Maybe I’ll claim another law (well, a corollary, anyway) and hereby name it the Orac Corollary of Poe’s Law just for The Refusers and the merry band of antivaccinationists who will be “rocking out” (as much as you can to such lame music) at Grant Park:

Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is utterly impossible to parody antivaccinationists in such a way that someone won’t mistake for the genuine article.

Two: These lyrics are so idiotic that I briefly flirted with the idea of doing a Hitler Zombie piece on this and ultimately decided that the undead Führer has more taste than that.

Finally, what’s that again about AutismOne, Age of Autism, and the “vaccines cause autism” movement not being “anti-vaccine”? In any case, this is so hilarious that anyone who can score me a copy of the complimentary Refusers CD being passed out at the anti-vaccine rally in a week will earn Orac’s eternal gratitude. I’d really love to see the artwork.

Comments

  1. #1 Sullivan
    May 19, 2010

    Sorry to snake the idea from you, Orac.

    Here–I’ll transcribe a bit of “Get your mandates out of my body” for you:

    Get your mandates out of my body.
    I’ve been to your meetings and seen what you do
    Scientific bureaurocrats making up rules.
    Innocent children to you are a tool
    If they don’t get your shots they can’t go to school

    Get your mandates out of my body
    Get your mandates out of my life
    Get your mandates out of my family
    Get your mandates out of my child

    Someone I know put it this way–if Saturday Night Live was short on material and, late Friday night/Saturday morning they still didn’t have anything, and they wanted to make fun of the anti-vaccine movement, they would probably make up lyrics like this.

  2. #2 dogmatichaos
    May 19, 2010

    There’s nothing classier than a good old-fashioned Hitler/Nazi comparison.

    Really though, there’s absolutely zero reason to reach out to vaccine-denialists, unless they have some desire to be reached. I think the best that could be done is for someone to print out every copy of every study, every piece of scientific evidence, every bit of research on vaccines safety and efficacy, make thousands upon thousands of copies, and then hand them out in massive binders labelled: “ACTUAL SCIENCE (not cheap rhetoric and bullet points)”.

    It probably wouldn’t matter in the least though…any evidence for vaccines would be immediately dismissed as part of the conspiracy, for that is one of the hallmarks of any good conspiracy theory, it’s ability to be unfalsifiable.

  3. #3 dogmatichaos
    May 19, 2010

    Story: I once sat down and had an extended conversation with an anti-vaccinator/vaccinationist (what’s the proper terminology). After answering his list of bullet points logically (the differences between correlation vs causation, the different types of mercury and effects of dosage, the effectiveness of vaccines as a public health measure), he eventually ran out of more bullets to fire at me. So he finished with this statement:

    “Do you believe everything they tell you?”

    I often share this story, because I feel like it just demonstrates the ability people embedded in conspiracies have to abandon or ignore all information that disagrees with them. Why have logical arguments when presented with evidence and reason, when you can just dismiss that evidence?

  4. #4 Party Cactus
    May 19, 2010

    Ah, an anti-vax song. Well, all right then, it’s hastily formed lyrical comment time!

    That anti-vax is whack, don’t listen to no quack.
    It’s a position based on lies and total bull
    Call me the Professor, I’m taking you to med-school.

    Vaccines don’t cause autism or whatever you claim
    The studies have been done, the results were all the same.
    Wakefield’s study was bogus, absolute horseshit,
    Cause no one’s ever been able to replicate it.

    And despite Brain Deer, they’re still spreading fear
    cause they got questionable treatments to sell.
    Spreading their screed to satisfy their greed
    People like that have a special place reserved in hell.

    And that’s what happens when you listen to a quack,
    preventable disease makes a comeback.
    We’ve seen it happen in in the UK,
    Measles returns, it had once gone away.
    The numbers don’t lie, vaccine rates go down, kids start to die.
    Don’t you people see the danger,
    of listening to fools like the Health (sic) Ranger?

    That’s what happens when you wear away herd immunity,
    which is a basic scientific property,
    It’s not up for debate, this ain’t 1868,
    it’s a well proven fact of population biology.

    There ain’t no medical conspiracy,
    that’s just your scientific illiteracy.
    Look at the history of disease and it’s plain to see,
    by stopping smallpox alone, vaccines may have saved you or me.

    So the next time some quack spouts rhetoric,
    containing psuedoscience that could make us all sick,
    think critical, see through scientific eyes,
    and the light of reason will pierce the darkness of anti-vax lies.

  5. #5 Julian Frost
    May 19, 2010

    @Party Cactus:
    Bravo! Encore!

  6. #6 dt
    May 19, 2010

    I recently wrote a parody antivax song to the tune of “We don’t need no edjucashun” by Pink Floyd.

    I’m keeping it to myself. The risks of it incontinently squirting onto the intertubes and being adopted by the loons is too great.

  7. #7 MI Dawn
    May 19, 2010

    OK. So the first 2 hits via google for Michael Belkin are on whale.to. Somehow, that does NOT give me a lot of confidence. It’s sad that his daughter died, but reading his testimony, things don’t quite mesh for me. It may be how he recalls the situation, but it doesn’t make sense to me.

    And when was Mr Belkin a “LA session player and recording artist”? According to my google search, “Michael Belkin was a financial forecaster and statistician uninvolved in medical policy…” I don’t find a Michael Belkin, musician, whose daughter died. Although I suppose he could have had 2 jobs…

    Not that I believe anything that AutismOne or their cronies says anymore.

  8. #8 Mojo
    May 19, 2010

    Poe and Godwin combined!

  9. #9 Rogue Medic
    May 19, 2010

    I wonder if someone could do a study looking at the anti-vax and anti-anti-vax people and compare the understanding of science and understanding of the application of the scientific method in both groups.

    What would it take to make the difference in scientific literacy completely clear?

  10. #10 Science Mom
    May 19, 2010

    The magnitude of their obsession with vaccines has clearly reached psychotic proportions if they are imagining forced vaccinations and a reciprocal obsession of vaccines by public health. This is just so indistinguishable from parody that I think they will actually serve to perform a public service by dissuading people (other than the already indoctrinated) from their ludicrous ’cause’.

    I believe Prometheus coined the term ‘full metal straight-jacket’, a much more apropos name for this so-called band.

  11. #11 Ben
    May 19, 2010

    Is it wrong that when I read “vaccine gestapo” I think “vaccine gazpacho”?

    Also, they only have 5 fans on their reverbnation site. With music like that, I’m not surprised. Probably not the most helpful of bands to have sing at the rally.

    Is anyone planning on going to the rally to get the free CD? I can make it, but I don’t want to have to make a trip into the city if someone else is going to be able to retrieve this garbage.

  12. #12 Todd W.
    May 19, 2010

    Those song lyrics and the description of the music really strike me as being eerily similar to the types of songs and bands at Charismatic/Pentecostal churches.

  13. #13 Jojo
    May 19, 2010

    Mmmm….vaccine gazpacho….*drools*

  14. #14 MikeMa
    May 19, 2010

    Could the assembly of so many potentially unvaccinated folks in Chicago and Grant Park constitute a public health hazard?

    I realize most of these idiots are vaccinated but they probably have their kids in attendance and swapping disease vectors….

  15. #15 Bluegrass Geek
    May 19, 2010

    Posted by: dt | May 19, 2010 6:14 AM

    I recently wrote a parody antivax song to the tune of “We don’t need no edjucashun” by Pink Floyd.

    The song is titled “Another Brick in The Wall, part 2.” Please don’t sully such a classic with the antivax lunacy! ;)

  16. #16 Todd W.
    May 19, 2010

    RE: vaccine gazpacho, would that be rotavirus vaccine, then?

    @MikeMa

    Pox Party in the Park!

  17. #17 Ben
    May 19, 2010

    @Todd W.

    Do babies really enjoy cold tomato soup?

  18. #18 MikeMa
    May 19, 2010

    @Todd W.
    Pox party indeed!. I think we should get Sid to carry babies with whooping cough through the park. He seems to think that’s not so bad. Harrummph.

  19. #19 Lycanthrope
    May 19, 2010

    Well, now we know why he was a session player and not a songwriter or lyricist.

    “Look, Michael, I appreciate the strong sentiment, but I just don’t think Nazi references are going to go over so well in a love ballad.”

  20. #20 Denice Walter
    May 19, 2010

    Unfortunately, Mr. Belkin is not the first to write anti-vax songs: Mike Adams *raps*!!!!!!!!!(see NaturalNews,under “music”-sic)Hear such gems as,”Don’t Inject Me(the Swine Flu Vaccine Song)”, as well as classics like,”S.S.R.I.’s, S.S.R.Lies”, and “I Want My Bailout Money!”,all available on his album,the aptly named,”Beyond All Reason”.(To be truthful,I have never actually *listened* to the clips Mikey provides-I *do* have limits.)

  21. #21 Pablo
    May 19, 2010

    We can write our own, equally bad versions. Songs like…

    “Keep Your Dangerous Kids Away from My Family You Self-Centered Sponge”

  22. #22 tonylurker
    May 19, 2010

    Pox Party in the Park!

    That’s a perfect idea for a parody! Put to Black Flag’s “TV Party”

    We’re gonna have a Pox party in the Park!
    The park!
    We’re gonna have a Pox party in the Park!
    The Park!

    We’ve got nothing better to do,
    then to pass around some virulent, contagious germs!
    . . .

  23. #23 Orac
    May 19, 2010

    Unfortunately, Mr. Belkin is not the first to write anti-vax songs: Mike Adams *raps*!!!!!!!!!

    How could I forget Mike Adams’ swine flu vaccine rap?

    http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2009/09/an_antivaccine_rap_by_a_rapping_health_r.php

    Actually, I wish I could forget it.

  24. #24 Shay
    May 19, 2010

    Pablo, if you can fit the lyrics to the tune of “Keep on the Sunny Side” I think you’ve got a winner.

  25. #25 Orac
    May 19, 2010

    How about a parody song done to Monty Python’s “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life?” :-)

  26. #26 Pablo
    May 19, 2010

    Pablo, if you can fit the lyrics to the tune of “Keep on the Sunny Side” I think you’ve got a winner.

    Who do you think I am, Cuttlefish?

    Orac, the only Python song I know is “Spam”

  27. #27 Art Tricque
    May 19, 2010

    I trust someone is organizing a counter protest to this ridiculous “American Rally for Personal Rights” event? Don’t live any where near Chicagoland myself.

  28. #28 Corina Becker
    May 19, 2010

    “infectious elements of funk, gospel, rock, and even a touch of punk”

    ::wince:: ouch. The mixture of those groups of music together sounds painful to me. Are these people masochists?

  29. #29 gpmtrixie
    May 19, 2010

    #27 – Art –

    Probably best to let them rave on by themselves and not give them any attention since they are not worthy of any.

  30. #30 skeptyk
    May 19, 2010

    Pablo #26 says: the only Python song I know is “Spam”

    Jab! Jab! Jab! Jab!
    Jab! Jab! Jab! Jab!
    Lovely jabs, wonderful jabs!

    and so on.

    Some stupid just annoys me, some baffles me, but the antivaxers enrage me. Hotlava angry.

  31. #31 Anthro
    May 19, 2010

    What did (actually) happen to his daughter?

    Why don’t they know how easy it is to opt out of vax in all or most states?

    How many people are expected to attend the Chicago event? I’m just wondering about the extent of their influence.

  32. #32 Rogue Medic
    May 19, 2010

    @ 26 Pablo,

    Orac, the only Python song I know is “Spam”

    Walk your cursor over to YouTube and prepare to laugh yourself silly. Just put monty puthon songs in the search bar, choose something, and enjoy.

  33. #33 Ana Observer
    May 19, 2010

    I wish Michael Flanders and Donald Swann were still alive to parodize Belkin et al in one of their immortal songs.

    @Orac and Denise Walter, you forgot the silent “c” when describing Mike Adams’ — er — contributions.

  34. #34 James Sweet
    May 19, 2010

    Perhaps someone should point out to them that vaccination isn’t mandatory…

  35. #35 Parse
    May 19, 2010

    Per Orac’s request:

    Vaccines in kids are bad
    They’re just a passing fad
    They’ll make your kids autistic or worse!
    When they’re in the doctor’s office
    Refuse that junk from Offit’s
    And hope that things’ll turn out for the best…
       And…always trust Ms. McCarthy’s advice…
       Always trust Ms. McCarthy with your life…
    If your doctor’s words sound rotten
    There’s something you’ve forgotten
    And that’s to close your eyes and ears and scream.
    Trust in Andrew W.,
    Your degree from Google U.,
    ‘Cause Rubella and the Measles are a dream!
       And…always trust Ms. McCarthy’s advice…
       Always trust Ms. McCarthy with your life…
    Ignore your doctor’s words
    They’re just a bunch of nerds;
    They’ve only studied medicine for years.
    Anecdotal stories
    Don’t play upon your worries
    The way rigorous studies do your fears!
       And…always trust Ms. McCarthy’s with your health…
       Always trust Ms. McCarthy – she’s got wealth!
    Vaccines are full of shit
    Orac should bloody quit
    Saying “Dosis facit venenum”.
    You’ll see we’re just a show,
    A job made out of snow,
    With research at the barest minimum!
       And…always trust Ms. McCarthy’s advice…
       Always trust Ms. McCarthy with your life…
       (Repeat and fade out).

    Good grief, I feel dirty for having written that.

  36. #36 Ian
    May 19, 2010

    @Parse

    Words fail me.

    Perhaps we should start giving out Minchin Awards or something for things like this. Bravo!

  37. #37 chris
    May 19, 2010

    They’re like a militia in Montana

    It seems to me that these people would likely support militias in Montana, being anti-government and all, but here they are portrayed as a bad thing.

    And

    your papers please, your papers please

    Similarly, I suspect they would be opposed to requiring papers to prove you’ve had your shots, but in favor of requiring them to prove you have your green card. Maybe I’m conflating movements, but I’m pretty sure there’s some crossover.

    Of course, who am I to expect that lyrics written by a lunatic would make sense?

  38. #38 Pablo
    May 19, 2010

    Walk your cursor over to YouTube and prepare to laugh yourself silly. Just put monty puthon songs in the search bar, choose something, and enjoy.

    Um, no.

    There’s a darn good reason why I don’t know any Monty Python songs besides Spam.

    It’s not as if I’ve never heard them. I just have no interest in hearing them ever again, much less to hear them enough times to the point where I actually know them.

  39. #39 esattezza
    May 19, 2010

    Ah yes, anti-vax songs… lovely. I wrote a poem about the movement last April… seems appropriate to share it now. (also, as a side note, I will not be attending Autism One, instead opting for the much more science-based IMFAR this weekend in Philly. Anyone care to meet up there?)

    “Autism Awareness:
    Part I: Indigo Children

    It’s April, and I turn the news on:
    There’s an ivory tower in the Amazon.
    Those inside have angered the warriors
    By concluding their children are not of the stars.
    “How dare you?!” the warriors reply.
    “My little boy’s perfect in my eyes.”
    The tower goes silent. What can it say?
    It deals in evidence, not emotion or faith.
    So the women disperse, feeling they’d won,
    And return home to their daughters and sons.

    *****

    These children really are different, in fact,
    Throwing the families’ lives out of whack.
    This one does not speak, another just screams.
    When things are changed, they come apart at the seams.
    Some don’t like to be touched, others hardly feel pain.
    Many can’t stand sounds like a bell, or the rain.
    When these troubled parents finally sleep
    Dreams of their children’s recovery run deep

    Part II: Awake in a Field of Lies

    The next morning they wake to a man who claims
    That those in the tower made their children that way.
    And, though he, himself, is ivory-built,
    Some parents believe he is free from all guilt.
    They rush at the tower again, this time armed,
    With the limited study, with which they were charmed
    By this man who has made them a part of his game,
    For he has much to gain if they bring about change.

    Those in the tower took the small study in stride,
    But spoke to the fear in these parents’ eyes:
    “Although we don’t think there is cause for concern,
    We will do our own studies so you may be assured.”
    Perform studies, they did, and of a grand scale,
    Each refuted the first, but to no avail.
    The damage was done; the world had lost trust,
    Claiming these findings were clouded by lust
    For the money that some thought there was to be gained
    By backing the companies that cause children pain.
    Talk of conspiracy rang from the tops of the trees:
    “It is a conflict of interest to put parents at ease
    When companies lobby the state, which provides
    Funding to science to feed the public its lies.”

    The man was a hero for rousing parents to action.
    Then the papers uncovered what had really happened.
    Lawyers had funded his research, you see,
    In an effort to sue those big companies,
    And now the man, of whom everyone spoke,
    May be facing having his license revoked.
    Yet, somehow, these parent-warriors don’t mind –
    Any study is perfect if they like what it finds.”

    Reproduce as you wish, but give credit to the author (Esattezza, or Christie Buchovecky, as you prefer.)

  40. #40 Shay
    May 19, 2010

    More Monty Python: “I’m an Anti-Vaxx and I’m Okay!”

  41. #41 Prometheus
    May 19, 2010

    Science Mom,

    The phrase was “full canvas jacket” and I got that from Peter Bowditch of ratbags.com. Where he got it from or if he made it up himself, I don’t know.

    Wherever the term came from, “full canvas jacket” certainly applies to the AutismOne crowd. I notice that on their revival meeting conference website, they have the following warning:

    We reserve the right not to register any individual based on our own judgment. We further reserve the right to ask any participant to leave the conference if that person’s conduct substantially interferes with the participation of others.

    I suspect this was added in response to some pointed (but polite) questions asked at a previous AutismOne revival meeting conference. Apparently, the AutismOne organisers have decided that they must maintain the purity of their dogma during the conference and allow none of the attendees to be exposed to opposing or contrary veiwpoints.

    Even more important to AutismOne, I suspect, is that nobody be allowed to ask questions that might suggest that the Emperor has no clothes.

    It seems that AutismOne has decided against allowing people attending it’s revival meeting conference to think. Check your brain at the door, pardner.

    They should enjoy the music, then.

    Prometheus

  42. #42 Todd W.
    May 19, 2010

    @Prometheus

    They should join the IDers; “Intelligence Not Allowed”.

  43. #43 Orac
    May 19, 2010

    The phrase was “full canvas jacket” and I got that from Peter Bowditch of ratbags.com. Where he got it from or if he made it up himself, I don’t know.

    Personally, I like the phrase “full mental jacket,” my homage to Stanley Kubrick. :-)

  44. #44 Kristen
    May 19, 2010

    esattezza eloquently wrote,

    Yet, somehow, these parent-warriors don’t mind –
    Any study is perfect if they like what it finds.”

    Just thought this needed to be repeated for emphasis.

  45. #45 HealthEd
    May 19, 2010

    I’m surprised nobody caught the adjective they oh-so-casually used here:

    “infectious elements of funk, gospel, rock, and even a touch of punk”

    Pox Party in the Park, indeed!

  46. #46 Sid Offit
    May 19, 2010

    @James

    Perhaps someone should point out to them that vaccination isn’t mandatory..

    Regarding an situation in Maryland a few years ago:

    School officials have said the parents will receive a verbal reprimand from the judge and be ordered to have their children immunized in the courthouse. The students would then be allowed to return to school. Parents who refuse to comply will get fines and could be jailed for ten days.

    I’m puzzled as to why the judge didn’t inform parents that they could just opt out rather than go to jail.

  47. #47 Raging Bee
    May 19, 2010

    Without a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is utterly impossible to parody antivaccinationists in such a way that someone won’t mistake for the genuine article.

    And here’s Raging Bee’s Corollary:

    Given enough time, whatever parody you offer will BECOME the genuine article, because these loons are too stoopid and narrow-minded, either to understand humor, or to distinguish it from serious commentary.

  48. #48 Science Mom
    May 19, 2010

    The phrase was “full canvas jacket” and I got that from Peter Bowditch of ratbags.com. Where he got it from or if he made it up himself, I don’t know.

    Oh good grief, I certainly mucked that one up. Apologies Prometheus and thanks for the clarification.

  49. #49 Science Mom
    May 19, 2010

    I’m puzzled as to why the judge didn’t inform parents that they could just opt out rather than go to jail.

    Nice, selective quote mining there Sid. The judge and prosecutors did inform parents that they either had to provide proof of vaccination or exemption form.

  50. #50 Sid Offit
    May 19, 2010

    @Science Mom

    Nice, selective quote mining there Sid. The judge and prosecutors did inform parents that they either had to provide proof of vaccination or exemption form.

    I’m sure your right but it’s not in my article. Please share how you discovered parents were informed of their opt out options

    And this from the Christan Science Monitor

    In fact, there are exemptions for medical or religious reasons in the state of Maryland. But few parents standing in lines that stretched down the sidewalk outside the county courthouse said they were aware of them.

    Here’s the headline from the Washington Post article

    Get Kids Vaccinated Or Else, Parents Told
    Pr. George’s Threatens Legal Action

    Vaccinated or else. Sure sounds compulusory. Maybe if you’re a detective you can discover that vaccines have some opt out mechanism but for the avergae parent they think in terms of no shot no school

  51. #51 Scott
    May 19, 2010

    Here’s the headline from the Washington Post article

    Vaccinated or else. Sure sounds compulusory.

    And here, ladies and gentlemen, we can see an example of the Idiotus Stupidus in its natural habitat. Observe in particular the breathtaking ease with which it extrapolates from a newspaper headline to the details of law.

    *ooh, ah*

  52. #52 Seb30
    May 19, 2010

    From Sid

    “no shot no school”

    Fine by me. If you don’t want to follow rules to live in my society, then don’t live in my society.
    You are free to try to modify rules, from the inside or the outside.
    But you are not free to claim that rules only apply to others peoples.

  53. #53 Science Mom
    May 19, 2010

    @Sid: http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/nation/5309438.html
    http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/WaterCooler/story?id=3880578&page=1

    It also appears as though anti-vax people handed out exemption information and talked to parents, who went ahead and had their children vaccinated anyway. These parents knew what their options were.

  54. #54 Sid Offit
    May 19, 2010

    It’s not your society

  55. #55 MikeMa
    May 19, 2010

    Parents stupid enough not to vaccinate against all evidence are clearly too dumb to find the exemptions.

    And it is my society. I follow the rules that help us all. You do not. Go away.

  56. #56 Seb30
    May 19, 2010

    From Sid: “it’s not your society”

    Maybe I should have said “social group”. And “my” refers to me belonging to it, not me leading it.

    If I have the same citizenship as you, then we belong to the same social group.
    If my children are going to the same school as yours, then our children belong to the same social group.
    If we are employed by the same company, then we are member of the same social group.
    And by joining one of these social groups, you accept tacitly a number of rules.

    If you don’t want to follow these rules, find a way to change them, or find yourself another group. But don’t just pretend rules shouldn’t apply to you because you don’t like them.

  57. #57 Composer99
    May 19, 2010

    @ Sid (re comment #50):

    Since most humans do as little work as they can get away with (you could call it laziness, I prefer efficiency) I should hardly be surprised that many people were not aware of the ability to get exemptions.

  58. #58 Rincewind'smuse
    May 19, 2010

    “infectious elements of funk, gospel, rock, and even a touch of punk”

    Wow. Unintentional irony? Certainly infectious, a mix I’d like to not be anywhere near, anytime soon. I’m sure their appearance will be marked by lots of infectious mixes rolling through the crowd; I’ll be home, thanks.

  59. #59 The Gregarious Misanthrope
    May 19, 2010

    Late to the party, but I think the anti-vaxxers would like a version of Monty Python’s “Every sperm is sacred” rewritten as “Every germ is sacred” since they like their communicable diseases so much.

    @Sid Offit

    Another simple solution: don’t send your kids to public school. They’ll be so much safer if you home school them. That way they won’t be exposed to the easily preventable diseases to which they are not immune.

    If states allow vaccine exemptions in public schools, I think the other parents should be informed. Unvaxxed kids present a material risk to others, especially kids who can’t be vaccinated for legitimate reasons. No I do not think philosophical (Mommy’s “gut” feeling) or religious reasons are legit.

  60. #60 Prometheus
    May 19, 2010

    Gregarious Misanthrope,

    If “Sid” home-schooled his kids, they also wouldn’t be exposed to communicable ideas, which are – not always, but often – the major concern of home-schoolers.

    Prometheus

  61. #61 wfjag
    May 19, 2010

    They aren’t anti-vax. They’re anti-skin cream.

    SOME SKIN CREAMS FOUND TO CONTAIN DANGEROUS LEVELS OF MERCURY, Wed., May 19, 2010 http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,593171,00.html

    Jenny, are you listening?

  62. #62 Prometheus
    May 19, 2010

    WFJAG,

    They aren’t anti-skin-cream, they’re pro-safe-skin-cream!

    Green our skin cream!
    Too much, too often!

    Prometheus

  63. #63 Catherina
    May 19, 2010

    Prometheus –

    Jenny has given up skin cream for botox a while ago, if I remember correctly?

  64. #64 Rogue Epidemiologist
    May 19, 2010

    Re: “Get Your Mandates Out of my Body”

    And yet, so many of the health freedom folks oppose a woman’s freedom to make reproductive choices. Ron Paul, case in point. Some mandates are more important than others…

  65. #65 Kristen
    May 19, 2010

    Jenny has given up skin cream for botox a while ago, if I remember correctly?

    I would love to hear her rationalize saying (to paraphrase); ‘no toxin in any amount’ all the while injecting herself with a deadly toxin.

  66. #66 Sullivan
    May 19, 2010

    “Nice, selective quote mining there Sid. The judge and prosecutors did inform parents that they either had to provide proof of vaccination or exemption form.”

    Science mom:

    The parents already knew.

    The Maryland schools vaccine history form has the religious exemption on it. Here is the current form, but it hasn’t changed since then.
    http://www.edcp.org/pdf/896_form.pdf

    Note the bottom of the form.

    That is, of course, aside from the obvious–anyone fighting vaccines that hard would have heard of exemptions.

    The Maryland situation was a manufactured controversy by the parents to get publicity for the vaccine-refusal groups.

  67. #67 ChrisKid
    May 19, 2010

    @65 Kristen, she’s only worried about the toxins for the children, you see. Because of course, it’s all about the innocent babies. She can poison herself all she wants, because she’s fully informed.

  68. #68 Katherine
    May 19, 2010

    “Get your mandates out of my body”? Seeing as vaccines aren’t legally required anywhere that I know of, then these people must be pro-choice, right?

  69. #69 Kristen
    May 19, 2010

    @ChrisKid

    it’s all about the innocent babies.

    But I thought it was all about teh evbil Big Pharma™ :)

    I know that she thinks it is okay because she can decide for herself, I still think it is hypocrisy of the highest order.

    1. Shot that appeals to my vanity=good

    2. Shot helps prevent dangerous disease in children=bad

    The difference being; she is injecting a real, not make pretend toxin.

    I am going to go and clean out my brain with bleach now, thinking about her gives me the jibbilies.

  70. #70 Cuttlefish
    May 19, 2010

    Ah, look at all the stupid people
    Ah, look at all the stupid people

    Jenny McCarthy doesn’t think twice, no research, doesn’t know what it means
    Fighting vaccines
    Works on her website, wearing a face that she bought from a surgeon out West
    Along with her breasts

    All the stupid people
    Where do they all come from?
    All the stupid people
    Where do they all belong?

    Doctor Habakus, thinking that risking your children is everyone’s choice
    Raises her voice
    Look at her working, spreading her disinformation to anyone there
    What does she care?

    All the stupid people
    Where do they all come from?
    All the stupid people
    Where do they all belong?

    Ah, look at all the stupid people
    Ah, look at all the stupid people

    Jenny McCarthy botoxed her face, now her smile has been turned to a mask
    Don’t even ask.
    Doctor Habakus, off to get paid thirty pieces of silver for what she has done
    At AutismOne

    All the stupid people
    Where do they all come from?
    All the stupid people
    Where do they all belong?

  71. #71 Samantha Vimes
    May 20, 2010

    Hmm. If you’re writing a “We don’t need no education” lyric for these folks, please tell me the chorus is: “All in all, it’s just another kid in the ground.”

  72. #72 Ummm
    May 20, 2010

    Y’all can go on all day, bit the idea that we should care whether there are Parabens in our makeup, or HFCS in our bread, but NOT if there is Mercury or Aluminum in our shots is totally untenable and ultimately won’t stand. The fact that we can clean up the bread or makeup supply in under 6 months of consumer demand but can’t clean up the vax supply in 20+ years of consumer demand says something IMHO, as does the fact that the media continually lies about when mercury was(nt) removed. (Uh, injected into preggos in greater amounts than EVER BEFORE this year. Up to 75 mcg for a preggo following recs, check my facts!). If it is totally benign (which isn’t chemically possible), why lie about where it’s at???

    There is no ethical obligation to accept every product off the pharmacy pipeline bearing the label ‘vaccine’. The refusal to consider these discrete products individually rather than as a group shows how unscientific & dogmatic yall’s side is, even while beating the drum of science. Are the vaccine injured really acceptable sacrifices to your public health God? That must be comforting to the mothers of the vaccine damaged. Or will you deny that vaccines ever injure anyone? Perhaps they had ‘bad genes’ that reacted negatively to the sacred serum? Or maybe they could be awarded Purple Hearts for bravery & sacrifice in the war on illness?

  73. #73 Ender
    May 20, 2010

    Shorter Umm: Blah Blah Blah they clean up the bread from real problems why will they not clean up the vaccines from problems that only exist in my head? Y’all are unscientific but I can’t present any evidence to that effect. Do you not care about the vaccine-injured who don’t actually exist?

  74. #74 Kristen
    May 20, 2010

    @Ummm

    Up to 75 mcg for a preggo following recs, check my facts!

    Okay let me just check your facts here…oh, you seemed to have forgotten to list any references. If you’re asking us to check your facts, surely you have some evidence to show us (that isn’t from AoA, Generation Rescue, Natural News, whale.to et. al.).

    Surely this is simply an over-site on your part.

  75. #75 Ben
    May 20, 2010

    Maybe Ummm is just doing a really good parody?

  76. #76 MikeMa
    May 20, 2010

    @Cuttlefish,
    Amazing as usual. Sorry you came so late to the game as more people might have enjoyed that excellent piece. I will see if my guitarist brother might like a go at recording it for fun.

    And now I must look up Dr Habakus, a new name for me.

  77. #77 BLueMaxx
    May 20, 2010

    and a bit of science..

    Debunking the AUTISM is related to DIET myth

    granted a small N# (but nearly twice as large as the WAKEFIELD Scam),
    >> noted to be “The study is the most controlled diet research in autism to date.”

    NEWS RELEASE re AUTISM ‘treatment” with Gluten Free diet.
    http://www.urmc.rochester.edu/news/story/index.cfm?id=2860

  78. #78 Orange Lantern
    May 20, 2010

    Cuttlefish, you continue to amaze! I think I’ll go home and sing the new lyrics on Beatles Rock Band.

  79. #79 Orange Lantern
    May 20, 2010

    @ BlueMaxx:
    And actually blinded and controlled as well! The audacity!

  80. #80 Caro
    May 20, 2010

    Yes, BlueMaxx, I’ve looked at that study. Interestingly, there is another study currently underway that shows something entirely different than the study you referenced. I suppose, however, that such is the nature of the beast in regards to autism treatment research.

    The ScanBrit randomised, controlled, single-blind study of a gluten- and casein-free dietary intervention for children with autism spectrum disorders.
    Whiteley P, Haracopos D, Knivsberg AM, Reichelt KL, Parlar S, Jacobsen J, Seim A, Pedersen L, Schondel M, Shattock P.

    PMID: 20406576 [PubMed – in process]

    From the abstract:
    “Our results suggest that dietary intervention may positively affect developmental outcome for some children diagnosed with ASD. In the absence of a placebo condition to the current investigation, we are, however, unable to disqualify potential effects derived from intervention outside of dietary changes. Further studies are required to ascertain potential best- and non-responders to intervention. The study was registered with ClincialTrials.gov, number NCT00614198.”

    And what do you know? It’s also blinded and controlled.

  81. #81 Pablo
    May 20, 2010

    And what do you know? It’s also blinded and controlled.

    Huh? Do you know what “controlled” means?


    In the absence of a placebo condition to the current investigation,

    This says right there that they did NOT control for “potential effects derived from intervention outside of dietary changes.”

  82. #82 Orange Lantern
    May 20, 2010

    Yeah, correct me if I’m wrong, but there is no placebo involved in the ScanBrit study. It’s single-blinded by the title, but it’s unclear how the blinding was done. Single blind usually means blinded to the participants but not to the examiner, yes? I’m not sure how they blinded to the participants with no placebo.

    So, it’s “controlled” in the sense that it has a control group, but it is not placebo-controlled nor do they attempt to control for other artifacts. If I’m reading the Rochester study correctly, it is placebo-controlled, double-blinded, and:

    controlled for other interventions, such as what type of behavioral treatments children received, to ensure all observed changes were due to dietary alterations. Past studies did not control for such factors.

  83. #83 Deb
    May 21, 2010

    OK, very late here but I was pointed to this beautiful piece by shellity the other day:

    A’s for Anti-vaccination, which you are, let’s face it.
    B’s for Brain. You’ve got one, but you frequently misplace it.
    C is for Complaints to the Commission, based on facts;
    D is for Donations that do Disappearing acts.
    E’s for education, which you give but don’t receive
    F is for the falsehoods that you’d have us all believe.
    G is for Gish Gallop, or a cavalcade of lies;
    H is Homeopathy, which doesn’t immunise.
    I is immunology, a science beyond your ken;
    J is for autism-’curer’, Playboy bunny Jen.
    K is for the “knowledge” that you have about this issue;
    L’s for ‘Living Wisdom’ (read: ‘expensive toilet tissue’).
    M is for that Meryl, vocal harbinger of doom;
    N’s for @nocompulsoryvac, her tweeting nom de plume.
    O is for the bane of anti-vaxxers’ lives, Paul Offit;
    P is for big Pharma, and for horrid, evil profit.
    Q’s for Questions brought before your doctor’s ugly mug;
    R is for reactions that are swept under the rug.
    S is for the Swine ‘flu, which you claim is manufactured;
    T is for the truth, which in your case is clearly fractured.
    U’s for the Uniting Church, which wouldn’t house your speeches;
    V’s for Vaccines, which you’d gladly substitute with leeches.
    W’s for Whooping Cough, which shouldn’t still be ’round;
    X is xeno-antigen, an ‘x’ word that I found.
    Y is yadda, yadda – what I hear when you start quacking;
    Z is zip your lip, my friends, be gone! Sod off! Get packing!
    http://shellity.blogspot.com/2010/05/a-to-z-of-anti-vaccination.html

  84. #84 The Gregarious Misanthrope
    May 22, 2010

    Hey, Ummm. Like most of the folks who take a dump here then run, you forgot to back up your “facts.” Your ilk seems to show up demanding that we prove you wrong without you bringing anything to share fact-wise, just your opinion pulled out of thin air (being charitable). That makes you a free-loader at someone else’s picnic. Just rude.

    http://switchboard.nrdc.org/blogs/gsolomon/h1n1_vaccine_and_thimerosal_to.html

    This was the only reference I could find (in 5 minutes of looking). Unsurprisingly, you’re wrong. For a thimerosal-containing multi-dose vial of H1N1 vaccine, a person would get 25 mcg of mercury, which, as the article states, is about 1/2 can of tuna’s worth of mercury. The single dose shots don’t contain any thimerosal and they were the ones recommended to pregnant women and young children. This is done only as a precaution, not because there has ever been any evidence of harm. So if a pregnant woman got an H1N1 shot from a multi-dose vial, she would have gotten at most 25 mcg of a relatively benign form of mercury.

    BTW, the mercury in tuna is methyl mercury which has been proven to be harmful to people including developing fetuses. The mercury in thimerosal is ethyl mercury which is not nearly so harmful. If this seems confusing, try drinking 3-4 ounces of ethyl alcohol and 3-4 ounces of methyl alcohol and let us now how they compare. (Hint: one will give you a buzz, the other will give you a funeral. Choose wisely.)

  85. #85 Jim
    May 22, 2010

    Failed attempts to explain a parody blog led me to an enhancement of Poe’s Law. Folks who believe the woo will believe the fake woo too – how do you do?

    Stone’s Law:
    Even with a winking smiley or other blatant display of humor, it is impossible to create a parody of Fundamentalism that SOMEONE won’t insist, despite overt profferings of revelatory explanation and analysis, to be the real thing.

    {Copyright 2010 Jim Stone. Permission granted to re-use this statement if quoted exactly and completely, including the title “Stone’s Law”.}

  86. #86 The Gregarious Misanthrope
    May 23, 2010

    It takes stones to rewrite Poe.

  87. #87 trepto
    September 24, 2010

    Ah, look at all the stupid people [etc]

    Thank you, Cuttlefish, for a full work day of suppressed giggles and Significant Humming.

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