Oscillator

The Beard-ome

Another Hydrocalypse Industries original production, the Beard-ome presents imaginary work on the genomics of the beard. What’s lying beneath your beard?

Comments

  1. #1 hectocotyli
    March 29, 2010

    Imaginary? You are far too modest! This science is huge. Grizzly Adams huge.

  2. #2 Jonathan Eisen
    March 29, 2010

    Brilliant

  3. #3 mseman
    March 30, 2010

    You guys are just awesome, makes working during vacation easier

  4. #4 mousedude
    March 30, 2010

    I’m submitting this for journal club this week.

  5. #5 JAKE
    March 30, 2010

    Men would buy bear-dome brand hair care products for grooming the beardome. Lots of men.

  6. #6 Ed Yong
    March 30, 2010

    Surely to understand the genomics of the beard, it is first necessary to sequence the full gardengnome?

  7. #7 DM10003
    March 30, 2010

    As I say on my gay bear blog, “Bear is Better”.

    And if beards are eventually deemed security threats or child abuse, just as what happens they take babies away from child abusing parents, take the beard away and I’ll just make another.

    I foresee lawsuits between backhair research and beard research”.

    I’m not even sure what I’m talking about.

  8. #9 daedaalus2u
    March 30, 2010

    The thing is, surface bacteria are extremely important in human physiology. The ones that I am working with, ammonia oxidizing bacteria set the basal NO/NOx level by converting the ammonia in sweat into NO plus nitrite.

    Unfortunately people think it is a joke, when actually is it one of the most important regulatory aspects of physiology. Providing a niche for these bacteria is why humans have hair, why the scalp is think and well vascularized, why there are emissary veins that pass from the scalp through the skull. It is to get the NO/NOx from the scalp into the venous sinuses of the brain ASAP.

    Hair under the arms is to provide NO/NOx to the major lymph nodes in close proximity, and to provide NO/NOx to the lymph coming back from the arms, and in particular the hands which are major contact points with the environment. Immune system regulation requires that NO/NOx for antigen presenting cell maturation and the rest.

    The reason for andrenergic sweating, is to increase NO/NOx levels. That is why it happens mostly at night, night sweats are a sign of low NO/NOx. This is the reason for profuse sweating when you to into shock, it is to generate profuse NO/NOx. Making more NO/NOx is why hypovolemic shock causes profuse sweating.

  9. #10 Matt H.
    March 30, 2010

    This is amazing, if you need an consultant I have over 6 years of beard experience.

  10. #11 sikapaga
    March 31, 2010

    Too bad I shaved my beard too early! Missed my chance to be an experimental subject and just maybe get an acknowledgement or even my face in both Science and Nature.

  11. #12 Comrade PhysioProf
    April 3, 2010

    HilariousQ!

  12. #13 Boo
    May 7, 2010

    I thought they would discuss the genes related to why some people are unable to grow beards. Very disappointed. Also not funny.

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