Wrong wardrobe

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I'm gimping about NY today, and I should have read Bizarro before I left to get some fashion tips.

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EYEPATCH WEARING PIRATE CAPTAIN: Jib the mainsails, me hearties!

PIRATE CREW: Aye-aye, Captain!

EYEPATCH WEARING PIRATE CAPTAIN: Make fun of my occular capacity again and ye'll walk the plank!