Is there such a thing as a sophisticated pirate joke?
Category: Humor • Pirates
Posted on: September 5, 2006 12:39 PM, by PZ Myers
No. I think not.
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PZ Myers is a biologist and associate professor at the University of Minnesota, Morris.
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Comments
Totally off topic, but has anyone recieved their Focus on the Family books yet? Its been longer than the shipping period, but I've recieved nothing. Was it too good to be true?
Posted by: plunge | September 5, 2006 12:52 PM
Haven't received mine either... I would give it, as they say, 4 to 6 weeks.
Posted by: speedwell | September 5, 2006 12:57 PM
A pirate walks into a bar. The barkeeper is surprised to see a large ship's wheel shoved down his britches. "Do you know you've got a steering wheel in your trousers, sir?" he enquires.
"Yarr," says the pirate, "it's driving me nuts".
I believe this provides a further data point in favour of your assertion.
Posted by: Corkscrew | September 5, 2006 1:09 PM
A quick trip to Google was disappointing ... I didn't see any geologists with a "Pyrates of the Caribbean" page. (Lots of links to the movie, misspelled, but no rocks.)
Posted by: just john | September 5, 2006 1:20 PM
Oops, didn't think of the other (and probably proper) spelling ...
So now, I find things like Pyrites of the Caribbean: (USA, 2003) Johnny Depp is dissapointed to discover that Blackbeard's treasure is actually Iron Disulfide. ...
Posted by: just john | September 5, 2006 1:26 PM
Some Piratical fun from the animation side of things.
http://www.pyrats.net/movie.html
Posted by: Left_Wing_Fox | September 5, 2006 1:32 PM
Why are pirates called pirates?
Bacause they 'Arrrrgh'.
Posted by: David Hone | September 5, 2006 1:40 PM
Check this pirate out.
NSFW warning: The contents of the linked page may change at any time, and is likely to within the next day or two. The site is known for patently NSFW content.
Posted by: Magnus Malmborn | September 5, 2006 1:45 PM
The first joke my daughter learned to tell:
Q: Why couldn't the pirate go to the movie?
A: Because it was rated aarrrghh...
Posted by: George Cauldron![[TypeKey Profile Page]](http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/nav-commenters.gif)
|
September 5, 2006 1:55 PM
The New Yorker had one years ago. In the cartoon, there's a classroom full of small children, and one pirate. The teacher says, "OK class, pi is equal to what squared? Bluebeard, you might know this one."
Sophisticated.
Posted by: mothworm | September 5, 2006 1:58 PM
There's always the venerable and widely linked "Pirate Riddles for Sophisticates."
Perhaps we could try to work "Sudo shiver me timbers" into the pirate-joke ouvre. You know, 'cause that sudo joke is so funny and all.
Posted by: HP | September 5, 2006 1:59 PM
Younger offspring was frolicking about the house pretending to be a dog the other day. "Arf! Arf!"
Mid-frolic, younger offspring picked up a toy hand-hook that had been left on the couch by elder offspring, and switched seemlessly to, "ARRRf! ARRRf!"
They start young, these scurvy dogs.
Posted by: Dr. Free-Ride | September 5, 2006 2:02 PM
What does a pirate chant when he is meditating?
"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh"
Posted by: BlueIndependent | September 5, 2006 2:03 PM
To answer the James Dobson question-
"Unfortunately, there is currently a coordinated effort in the marketplace to abuse Focus on the Family's benevolent practices. Let me also assure you that we have stopped the shipment of the items you selected. We're sorry for any inconvenience you've experienced due to these circumstances. If you need further assistance, please call 1-800-232-6459.
Michele Novak
Constituent Response Representative
Focus on the Family"
Posted by: Karley | September 5, 2006 2:13 PM
Um...I liked the idea of the joke, but π ≠ r2
Posted by: Jim Hu | September 5, 2006 2:23 PM
Should be r^2 (sup tag didn't work).
And blueindependent. I would think a meditating pirate would chant:
Ruuuuuuuum
Posted by: Jim Hu | September 5, 2006 2:29 PM
Hey Karley, where and when did you recieve that notice? And on what date did you place the order?
Posted by: plunge | September 5, 2006 2:56 PM
I thought this one was a pretty good.
Posted by: Evan | September 5, 2006 3:11 PM
courtesy St. Roy Underhill (The Woodwright's Shop on PBS):
Why do pirates insulate their ships?
For the Arrrrgh! value, of course.
fusilier
James 2:24
Posted by: fusilier | September 5, 2006 3:24 PM
plunge- I had to ask them where my stuff was. And I placed it the day after it was posted here, IIRC.
Darn- we broke FotF!
Posted by: Karley | September 5, 2006 3:40 PM
Darn. It was too good to be true: free copies of books I want to read but would never pay money for.
Posted by: plunge | September 5, 2006 3:59 PM
Are any of these pirates married to a woman named Peggy?
Posted by: MikeM | September 5, 2006 4:21 PM
When Peggy takes of her prosthesis, she answers to Eileen.
Posted by: Dr. Free-Ride | September 5, 2006 4:24 PM
William Penn had a hard time finding a way to market his aunt's pies because they cost so much to make, the prices had to be outrageous in order to turn a profit. In fact, it got so bad that the big scandal of the day was the Pie Rates of Penn's Aunts.
BAH-DUM CHEESH!
....[crickets]
Posted by: JackGoff | September 5, 2006 4:56 PM
How much did the pirate pay for corn?
A Buck An Ear!
Posted by: Stogoe | September 5, 2006 5:03 PM
What modern science actually tells us is that we live in a remarkable and dynamic universe, in which the genuine miracle is its remarkable embrace of life and change. -- Kenneth Miller
How a pirate would say it:
Lookie thar at that rock. That`s th' real miracle a pile o' dirt an' a rock. Wow, miracles be really nifty accordin' t' th' Holy Father ya scallywag who ortin' t' be keel hauled!
Posted by: 386sx | September 6, 2006 2:47 AM
Um...I liked the idea of the joke, but π ≠ r2
Not to mention the fact that Bluebeard wasn't a pirate.
Posted by: truth machine | September 6, 2006 3:32 AM
"Let me also assure you that we have stopped the shipment of the items you selected. "
As always, too god to be true.
I have never understood how the fashionable pirate should accessorize.
A pARRRot or a pARRRakeet?
Posted by: Torbjörn Larsson | September 6, 2006 5:14 AM
Torbjörn, that is the single best Swedish-English pun I have ever seen :).
Posted by: RavenT | September 6, 2006 10:40 AM