Pharyngula

First they came for the pirates…

Morgan Smith is six years old and is going to have a birthday party with a pirate theme. His parents hoisted a Jolly Roger up the flagpole, and…boom, some officious titzypritzel goes bustling off to the city council to complain. Down goes the flag. Now there is what a deranged bureaucrat might call a “happy ending”:

A Stafford Borough Council spokesman said: “A planning application has been made for a Jolly Roger flag to be flown at a property in Stone.

“The application is currently under review and will include planning officers looking at the impact the flag has on the area, with the decision expected by the end of this month.

“Legislation requires planning approval before it can be flown from the flagpole.”

Erk. That’s the antithesis of pirate. I say, hoist the flag, run out the cannon, and give the pretentious stuffed shirts at the Stafford Borough Council a broadside. Give that mob of six year olds cake, ice cream, and good sugary soft drinks, hand ‘em each a cutlass, and turn ‘em loose on the neighborhood. Yarrr, that’s the pirate solution.