Pharyngula

Poor Neal

Neal gets no respect. He’s been trying and trying to comment over at the Panda’s Thumb, and his rants keep getting shut down. Well, I’m going to let one of his comments through right here — as far as I’m concerned, they’re a kind of twisted, insane poetry. You can almost picture his brain arcing and shorting and fizzing away, and you can virtually see the instant the circuit breaker blows.

It is just very difficult for me to follow the socially “hotpoint”
controversies that tend to “crop up” in this forum in a genuine discussion
of life system “origins” and what some might refer to as “darwanistically
supported resolutions to the vast array of (just and ONLY JUST) humanly
perceivable questions regarding the “chemicals to living ecosystems” splay
of assertions that have historically (within the past decade or two) been
(for understandable reasons up and to about 1959) been accepted as
legitimate claims regarding how in the mighty unknown realm (you 20 to 90
and beyond if you are there, year old lovers of your masturbatorial
philosphy) you could actually BELIEVE IN THESE RIDICULOUSLY OVERSTATED
CLAIMS (UNDISCIPLINED IMAGINATIONS) TAKING INTO CONSIDERATION THE STUPIDLY
INTERPRETED
RESULTS OF POINTED INVESTIGATIONS THAT WERE SET UP FOR THE PURPOSE OF
DEMOSTRATING THE VASTLY FAR FRICKING FETCHED PHILOSOPHICAL PREFERENCES OF
THE “EXPERT” OVER THE PUBLIC, SELF PROCLAIMED MASTERS OF SCIENTIFIC
KNOWLEDGE. You should be ashamed of yourselves for you RIDICULOUSLY
UNSCIENTIFIC ASSERTIONS YOU HAVE MADE IN THE NAME OF “REAL SCIENCE.” YOU
AND YOUR MACRO-EVLOLUTIONARY COMPATRIOTS GIVE “REAL” SCIENCE A REAL BAD
NAME. (YOU JACK-ASSES.)

GO AHEAD MOST ELITE MASTERS OF TRUTH (EDITORS OF THIS SELFISHLY CONSTRAINED
FORUM) EDIT ME OUT AGAIN AS YOU HAVE SO MANY TIMES!!!!!!!!!!!! CONTINUE TO
BE A “FLAGSHIP” IN THE PROTECTION OF THE “TRIBES OF ASSERTIVE INFLUENCE”
FOR THE TOTALLY SCIENTIFICALLY UNSUBSTANTIATED ASSERTIONS FROM THE “WE
“WUV” (IN BABY TALK) TO BE ABLE TO UNDER “SCIENTIFIC” GUISE, ASSERT OUR
STUPID PET SPECULATIONS DOWN THE THROAT OF THE “IGNORANT” PUBLIC. AND IF WE
CAN DO THAT, IT MUST PROVE THAT WE ARE CORRECT IN OUR ASSERTIONS AND CAN
LIVE COMFORTABLY, KNOWING THAT THE IGNORANT PUBLIC WILL CONTINUE TO FUND
OUR BULLSHIT!!!!!!!!!!!

EDITORS, OUT OF SOME SORT OF SENSE OF “FAIRNESS” LET THIS POST EXIST FOR
MAYBE A FEW HOURS ANYWAY. YOU ARE SO FOND OF “STRIPPING” YOUR CONTROLLED
ENVIRONMENT OF ALMOST ANYTHING I SAY UNLESS YOUR BELIEVE IT CONTRIBUTES TO
YOUR SELF SERVING CAUSES.

<Sigh> I’ll never be able to write like that, not unless I take up a meth-and-steroid cocktail habit.

Comments

  1. #1 MAJeff
    September 28, 2007

    It’s gonna take more than meth to get you to write like that. Add a halucinogen to the mix and stay up for three days. Then maybe the sleep deprivation, lack of food, and hallucinations will you’ll get there.

  2. #2 MAJeff
    September 28, 2007

    I am, therefore, hereby (ever so modestly) proposing a new metric for mental health: if your sentence structure routinely becomes more baroque than does mine, seek professional help

    Aha! You’ve given us the answer. Neal’s posts are fugues.

  3. #3 Brownian
    September 28, 2007

    I’m confused. Is this a student essay on neurobiology?

    D-

    Okay, maybe I’ll bump that up to a D for his use of tmesis.

  4. #4 David Marjanovi?
    September 28, 2007

    I love how he takes a short break from the all caps in the middle of his rant. I can just picture him taking a breath and talking real soft there before launching back into the insanity. Priceless.

    Naaah. That’s where he noticed he had accidentally switched on Caps Lock and switched it off. Shortly afterwards, he happened to hit Caps Lock again — it’s a typo, folks. The insanity consists in overlooking this incredibly obvious typo.

    Caledonian, is the Timecube scale linear or logarithmic? Is someone with 0.7 Tc ten times as insane as someone with 0.6 Tc?

  5. #5 David Marjanovi?
    September 28, 2007

    I love how he takes a short break from the all caps in the middle of his rant. I can just picture him taking a breath and talking real soft there before launching back into the insanity. Priceless.

    Naaah. That’s where he noticed he had accidentally switched on Caps Lock and switched it off. Shortly afterwards, he happened to hit Caps Lock again — it’s a typo, folks. The insanity consists in overlooking this incredibly obvious typo.

    Caledonian, is the Timecube scale linear or logarithmic? Is someone with 0.7 Tc ten times as insane as someone with 0.6 Tc?

  6. #6 Greta Christina
    September 28, 2007

    People, people, people.

    It’s not nice to make fun of the mentally ill. :-)

    When Nurse Ingrid gets back from her trip, I’ll ask her for her armchair diagnosis. It sounds a lot like pressured speech — is there such a thing as pressured typing?

  7. #7 Greta Christina
    September 28, 2007

    “He needs to put foil in his hat. It’ll keep the rays out.”

    Actually, according to a recent issue of Paranoia magazine, the “tinfoil hat to keep the rays out” thing is itself a rumor spread by the evil conspiracy, as tinfoil actually acts to amplify the rays — not block them.

    I swear to dog. I am not making this up.

    Maybe that’s what happened to Neal. Maybe he believed the tinfoil hat story, and got his rays amplified. Poor devil.

  8. #8 David Marjanovi?
    September 29, 2007

    The Bad Boys of Punctuation at Penny Arcade:

    Bah. There are an estimated 10 commas missing after their treatment.

  9. #9 David Marjanovi?
    September 29, 2007

    The Bad Boys of Punctuation at Penny Arcade:

    Bah. There are an estimated 10 commas missing after their treatment.

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