…and this is a 
…don't bother.
A reader sent me a link to his photo set from the BVCSM, and I'm afraid all you'll find there is the Wall O' Text approach to instruction. You know what that is: print out a page from Answers in Genesis, blow it up real big, and slap it on a wall … instant museum!
There is one amusing revelation — creationists sometimes have the wackiest ideas — and it made me laugh.
Did you know that ALL dinosaur footprint fossils found are pointing in the same direction?! This is IRREFUTABLE PROOF of the dinosaurs running from a global flood!
Creation Logic 101: you don't need any! And now that you know everything that's entertaining about the place, you won't need to pay out $5 to some nut in a small town in Alberta, Canada to see it. Go to the Royal Tyrrell instead.
Actually, the funniest comment I've seen in a while is a testimonial proudly displayed at the top of the BVCSM website:
"I spent more time in this museum than I did in the Smithsonian"
The picture at the top of this article is the Big Valley Creation Science Museum: a small remodeled ranch house. This is the Smithsonian Institution: 19 museums and 9 research institutions, and over 100 million objects in their collections. That statement above is a testimonial to the delusions of the creationists, nothing more.
Politics
Comments
Posted by: Jud | September 15, 2007 10:51 AM
Through Bozeman, MT and the Museum of the Rockies (one Dr. Jack Horner, proprietor), then up to Alberta for the Royal Tyrrell makes a fine paleo/dino museum tour, along with some very pretty country to look at while you travel. The Canadian Rockies aren't all that far away from Royal Tyrrell once you're done there.
For skiers, there's Schweitzer, Big Mountain and Bridger Bowl on the U.S. side, Lake Louise, Fernie and Red Mountain on the Canadian.
Ah, memories. :-)
Posted by: Caucasian Jesus | September 15, 2007 10:52 AM
I would much rather that person stays inside the creationist museum for the rest of his life than he walk around the Smithsonian probably ranting about inconsistencies and Jeebus.
Posted by: merkin j pus-tart | September 15, 2007 11:13 AM
It is odd that they would state ". . . ALL dinosaur footprint fossils found are pointing in the same direction," for there is a photo of the front yard of the museum which counters this statement. On the front page, scroll down to the caption "Children walk on our dinosaur trails outside, following them to the fossils on display out there." Those tracks are headed in every direction!
Posted by: ericnh | September 15, 2007 11:26 AM
"ALL dinosaur footprint fossils found are pointing in the same direction?!"
Just had to laugh at that one. Obviously they've never been to Dinosaur State Park in Connecticut. Tracks there go all over the place.
Posted by: Anton Mates | September 15, 2007 11:29 AM
How could all footprints on the surface of a globe point in the same direction? Don't they mean that this is IRREFUTABLE PROOF of a flood sweeping in from space over a flat Earth?
Posted by: MAJeff | September 15, 2007 11:32 AM
They all point to Mecca.
Posted by: bPer | September 15, 2007 11:34 AM
I notice the telescope near the chair on the right. Zooming in on the full-size version of the image, I can't make out the brand, but it appears to be about a 100mm Newtonian on an equatorial mount. Even if it's a cheap mass-market scope, it sure is a shame to see it used as a mere prop to sell pseudoscience and religion. I bet there's a kid or youth group in that vicinity that would love an opportunity to put that instrument to its proper use.
Posted by: Alex | September 15, 2007 11:41 AM
Or maybe they've just never been to the Smithsonian Institution?Posted by: Andrés | September 15, 2007 11:42 AM
Not only that. Before the flood, dinosaurs never walked, ever. They just stayed put on the spot where they were born and fed on unsuspecting passers-by. Their eggs had big, long hairs so they could be carried away by the wind, until they fell to the ground and hatched.
Posted by: Chaz | September 15, 2007 11:42 AM
Well at least this isn't representative of The Great White North -- I mean, there's nothing like this in my hometown of Toronto!
Oh wait
Posted by: Kseniya | September 15, 2007 11:45 AM
Weren't we treated a few months ago to a photo of Scott Hatfield, OM standing in front of this museum? Or was that museum in a extra-wide mobile home? (It's hard to keep them all straight now that "Creation Science" is sweeping the nations of North America.)
Posted by: MarcusA | September 15, 2007 11:54 AM
"I spent more time in this museum than I did in the Smithsonian"
The Big Valley Creation Science Museum doesn't look much bigger than my two car garage. And sadly, I have spent more time in it than the Smithsonian.
It was funny when the news media touted the fact that Ken Ham's creation museum cost $25 million, and is 50,000 square feet. Well, the new California Academy of Sciences, which opens in 2008, cost $500 million and is about 400,000 square feets. Real science attracts real money.
http://www.calacademy.org/
The new Cal Academy is going to have a rain forest, a coral reef, a living roof, and a planetarium. So, suck on it Big Valley Creation Museum.
Posted by: Johnny Vector | September 15, 2007 12:02 PM
What is it with kooks and 1996-style web design? Is there a Web Design for Loonies book out explaining how to pick the most garish color scheme and giant fonts in order to scramble readers' brains?
You know what I like best? That despite the design being from 1996, it's done with style tags. Very modern and up-to-date, mmm-hmm.
Posted by: Ken Mareld | September 15, 2007 12:05 PM
I spent a week in the various Smithsonian museums, and I plan to go back for more.
Looks like a California vacation sometime in 2008 for the new California Academy of Sciences museum.
I spent 15 seconds looking at BVCSM photos. Way more than enough for me.
Posted by: Johnny Vector | September 15, 2007 12:09 PM
So okay, I was looking at those Connecticut dino tracks, and it's clear what's going on. Look at them; they're all running in all directions, like proverbial chickens with their heads cut off. Obviously terrified of the oncoming floodwaters.
I mean Jesus, people, how obvious could it be? Not only are the dinosaur tracks all running in the same direction, but they're also running in all directions, terrified! What more proof could you possibly need?
Also, I have brought Jesus himself here, into the next room. But not only can I do that, but I can also make him disappear as well. Just go into the next room and you'll see! No Jesus! How can you refute that?
Bunch of goddam logic lovers...
Posted by: Zeno | September 15, 2007 12:15 PM
Hey! Is that a velociraptor where the swamp cooler should be? And where did the swamp cooler go? Perhaps the velociraptor ate it! It just occurred to me that swamp coolers are just about extinct, aren't they? Maybe that's what happened to the dinosaurs! They used to eat swamp coolers and subsist on the spiders and bugs that lived in their damp interiors. (Lots of good fiber there, too, from the filters.) When swamp coolers went away, the dinosaurs starved to death. Yeah!
There might be a few swamp coolers left in places like Texas, so cryptozoologists might want to look there for any surviving dinosaurs.
My swamp-cooler theory of dinosaur extinction is much more reasonable than the one about a giant meteor strike and I'm sure creationists will flock to my banner. I know some critics will ask why dinosaurs didn't just start eating air conditioners instead, but that would have required them to evolve, and that's not allowed.
Did I have too much coffee this morning? I think so.
Posted by: MH | September 15, 2007 12:22 PM
I guess that the dino above the entrance is to lure the kiddies in. I'm amazed they didn't just make the building out of gingerbread.
Posted by: lylebot | September 15, 2007 12:22 PM
What he means is that he stopped in the Smithsonian bathroom to pee, but stopped in the BVCSM bathroom for a bowel movement.Posted by: Tanya | September 15, 2007 12:25 PM
I absolutely loved the Royal Tyrell museum when I was there this summer and I can't wait to see it again. This creation museum doesn't look entertaining in the slightest.
Posted by: 6EQUJ5 | September 15, 2007 12:32 PM
Actually, I'm impressed by their museum, as pictured. That looks like actual glass in the windows. I love those fancy store-bought chairs. And flowers, in a bucket -- how festive. I bet they have metal hinges on the outhouse door. I'm puzzled why there's a giant lizard where the hex sign belongs.
(Whoever laid those paving stones on the right was either high on moonshine or reeling with religiosity.)
Posted by: Ritchie Annand | September 15, 2007 12:59 PM
A friend of mine dropped by there and alternated between amused and horrified the entire time. I'm hoping she drops me more details.
Remember that in addition to this fixed-in-place creation museum up here, there's also a traveling one.
You can almost see those cogs whirring behind the coelacanth display. Putative train of thought:
"Evolution says things change. That means evolution says things MUST change. After all, they say monkeys turned into men. So all I have to do is find the creatures on earth that haven't changed much, and I've disproven the whole thing! Whoopee!"...
"...Now I'm going to go off and prove that very low and high IQs don't exist and that nobody in the world can ever get a royal flush by playing poker."
Are you willing to stop asking questions of nature yet?
Or will you heathens keep doing things like attempt to find out how coelacanth vision evolved?
...
Heathens!
Posted by: Ben M | September 15, 2007 1:05 PM
What direction were they running, exactly? A flood comes from a different direction depending on where you are. If the dinosaurs tracks on the west flank of the hill are running the same way as the ones on the east flank, that's ... well, meaningless in reality, but by the creationist argument it's a disproof of the rain-based Biblical flood.
Posted by: Todd Green | September 15, 2007 1:10 PM
No one is delusion free, but there is one that makes the deluded totally obnoxious: the righteousness that demands the evangelist get up in my face as a sacred duty. All others are harmless except to their own ability to adapt to nature, the real reality.
Posted by: Janine | September 15, 2007 1:16 PM
Sadly, it is easier to get around the weight of gathered facts and evidence. The truth is simple. In order to lie and keep the lie standing, you have to keep making more lies to support the older lies. Therefore, the simple beauty of BVCSM outweighs the sheer bulk of the secular humanist pack of lies that is The Smithsonian.
For the sake of Ed Darrell, so he does not call again me a christian, the above was pure snarkiness.
Posted by: Owlmirror | September 15, 2007 1:22 PM
Silly atheo-santaic evilotionists!
Dino feets print evidence is obvious proof: feets always point same way. Dino feets track mean dino going away from some where. Flood is some where. So dino going away from global flood. Simple!
Smart Creationists am smrt!
Posted by: Dan | September 15, 2007 1:23 PM
I'd give anything to see a strip club open up next door to the place.
Posted by: PZ Myers | September 15, 2007 1:35 PM
That, too, would be a testimonial to the power and glory of God.
Posted by: The Disgruntled Chemist | September 15, 2007 1:40 PM
Is it too early to start lining up?
Posted by: David Marjanović | September 15, 2007 2:08 PM
ROTFL!!!
Posted by: K. Engels | September 15, 2007 2:51 PM
The only time I willing read anything by someone who supports some form of creationism and/or theistic evolution was when I read Raptor Red by Robert T. Bakker. It was actually a rather interesting novel (of course evolution had no role in the narrative, so there were no nutty theories contained in the book.)
Posted by: Zeno | September 15, 2007 3:13 PM
I thought that Noah's flood was caused by (1) rain, (2) collapse of the orbital water canopy, and (3) rupture of the fountains of the deep. In that case, wouldn't the global flood waters come from all directions at once? I suspect the fossil record would support that theory. That makes it appear that the BVCSM is promulgating a heresy!
Do creationists conduct heresy trials? Could be fun!
P.S.: I would dearly love to know more about which direction is the direction in which all the dinosaur tracks allegedly face. North? South? East? West? If it's east or west, then dinosaurs near the north or south pole must have run in tight circles!
Posted by: JDB | September 15, 2007 3:30 PM
I saw the "curator" of this place interviewed a few months ago, and he unleashed a strong competitor for Stupidest Creationist Argument: "Darwin was a theologian, so the Theory of Evolution is just a religious belief." Riiiiight.
Posted by: Monado | September 15, 2007 3:30 PM
Chaz, John Tory spoke up for "fairness" in education by funding all religious schools instead of just Catholics. However, he back-pedalled quickly at the public reaction. Just click on "reader comments" to read support for science from the general readership of this Conservative newspaper.
Of course we could just de-fund the Catholics and have one public system, but that would be breaking our promise about allowing a separate Catholic school board that could levy its own taxes, which was made about the time of Confederation to entice Quebec. Oh, wait... the Conservative provincial government took away that right from school boards in 1998. (Now boards just get money from general taxes and are at the mercy of the government when it comes to having enough money to pay teachers.) I don't know why they can break half of a promise but not the other half.
Posted by: K. Engels | September 15, 2007 3:41 PM
You're probably thinking too hard... The toes face forward, that is the 'direction' they're most likely referring to.
Posted by: rp | September 15, 2007 4:11 PM
Ooohh, I was thinking about a trip to Drumheller for the Royal Tyrrell, passing (by accident, I promise) through Big Valley on the way. I guess I could just stop early and skip the big museum I'd have trouble walking through anyway. Nah, I don't think the Creation Museum is even worth the trouble of stopping to point and laugh. And you already have a picture.
Posted by: Spanish Inquisitor | September 15, 2007 4:23 PM
Maybe I'm missing something here, but wouldn't a huge flood wash away all tracks? Tracks left in, say mud in soft river beds? They wouldn't be subjected to the factors that created the tracks we now know and love, would they?
Probably got locked in the bathroom over the Xmas holidays.
Posted by: Dr. K | September 15, 2007 5:10 PM
I guess Alberta is using it's oil money to become like a southern state.
Posted by: Marcus Ranum | September 15, 2007 5:19 PM
Those whom the gods would destroy, they first convince to believe in, uh, the gods.
Posted by: HeathenTV | September 15, 2007 5:31 PM
I posted a promotional clip by these nuts to heathen.tv a month or so ago. [hunts for clip...]
Here's a direct link to the YouTube vid:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysehQkpTnoM
Posted by: negentropyeater | September 15, 2007 7:01 PM
PZ, I luv you, this got to be the funniest post I've seen on Pharyngula since I have been cruising here...
where do you get these "gems" ?
Posted by: PZ Myers | September 15, 2007 7:05 PM
I've got a reputation. People see something insane, stupid, or bizarre, and they think of me (we will not contemplate the meaning of that) and off it goes in the mail.
I don't even use a tenth of what I get.
Posted by: negentropyeater | September 15, 2007 7:11 PM
Actually, its really funny, but its a bit sad really, I didn't realise these kind of "Museums" really existed in the USA. Gee !
I need to find out if there is one like that somewhere in Europe, especially with the cute little dinosaur and the two white plastic chairs, so cute....
Posted by: PZ Myers | September 15, 2007 7:17 PM
Hang on, you can't blame the US for this one! That museum is in Canada.
Posted by: negentropyeater | September 15, 2007 7:17 PM
noooo, made a fatal mistake, didn't realise it was actually in Canada. But I'm sure there are others in the US, are there ? Of that "Quality" ?
Posted by: negentropyeater | September 15, 2007 7:26 PM
and the video promo is fantastic, it's got great music and the best part is :
(tatataaaa)
EVOLUTION
(cymbals)
HAS
(cymbals)
BEEN
(cymbals)
FALSIFIED
Did they get the Nobel Prize ?
Posted by: Robert Madewell | September 15, 2007 7:27 PM
There's a little creation museum just 20 miles from me. It's called "The Earth History" Museum. It's in Eureka Springs, Arkansas. Has any of you guys been there? I've wanted to go to it, but my wife won't let me 'cuz she knows I'll get "huffy". If I can talk her into letting me go, PZ, I'll send you some pictures.
The museum is at a place called "The Great Passion Play". It's a dramatization of Jesus' last week on earth. My wife let me go to the play with her, but she drew the line at the creation museum.
The play wasn't all that good. The dialog was pre-recorded and the actors just gestured so it looked like they were talking. The good part was the resurection. The actor came out of the tomb like Elvis coming out on stage. My wife and I laughed so hard because it was such bad acting. Then, we looked around and everybody else was crying and looking at us like we were being so rude. I tried to stop laughing, but that made me laugh even harder.
Posted by: Owlmirror | September 15, 2007 7:39 PM
In Soviet
RussiaCanuckistan, Creationist parody you!Posted by: Janine | September 15, 2007 8:01 PM
Seeing that this is The Big Valley Creaton Science Museum, I now have a new theory about how the dinosaurs were wiped out. This would also explain why all of the dinosaur tracks are going in the same direction. They were wiped out by Miss Barbara Stanwyck's clan in The Big Valley.
Posted by: negentropyeater | September 15, 2007 8:12 PM
check the guy behind the museum, Ian Juby :
http://www.ianjuby.org/
he has some interesting "Research" projects, such as finding a live dinosaur.
The craziest is under "New virtual museum"
check :
Display 1 : "The Bacterial Flagellum" (thx Behe)
He says his evidence for creation is that according to his Hogwash-o-meter (R), an electric motor cannot form by natural processes
Posted by: Zeno | September 15, 2007 8:50 PM
The Passion Play in Eureka Springs was started by the fierce old anti-Semite Gerald L. K. Smith. He was a right-wing preacher and anti-evolutionist who used to decry the "treason machine" that drove Nixon out of office. (Too bad he didn't live long enough to actually hear the Nixon tapes.) Smith is also responsible for the construction of the rather tacky giant statue known as "Christ of the Ozarks."
Wow. I hadn't thought of that old bastard in years.
Posted by: AL | September 15, 2007 9:01 PM
I thought that Noah's flood was caused by (1) rain, (2) collapse of the orbital water canopy, and (3) rupture of the fountains of the deep. In that case, wouldn't the global flood waters come from all directions at once?
Yes, the flood waters came from all directions at once. However, all the animals were running toward the Himalayas. God granted them all a sixth sense for the high ground because He was a little confused as to whether He wanted the animals to die or to try to save themselves.
Posted by: Skemono | September 15, 2007 9:43 PM
Wait, Eureka Springs, Arkansas?
*runs upstairs, checks something*
I was right. Aside from the Christ of the Ozarks, which Zeno mentioned, Eureka Springs is also the headquarters of Christian Research.
Not really a reflection on the town itself (I hope), just an interesting coincidence.
Posted by: bay-of-fundie | September 15, 2007 11:06 PM
If you want a laugh, I picked apart the BVCSM video a few months ago on my website.
Posted by: The Flying Trilobite, fcd | September 15, 2007 11:43 PM
I did a couple of reviews on my blog about The Royal Tyrrell Museum from my visits this summer.
But if you want to see some old-skool kitsch, and avoid creationism in the process, please check out the Three Rivers Rock & Fossil Museum in Alberta.
I've got a review here:
http://glendonmellow.blogspot.com/2007/07/three-rivers-rock-fossil-museum.html
and I have three words for you:
"fossils & gnomes".
Ya can't miss it.
Posted by: zer0 | September 16, 2007 1:50 AM
"What is it with kooks and 1996-style web design? Is there a Web Design for Loonies book out explaining how to pick the most garish color scheme and giant fonts in order to scramble readers' brains?" - #13
I'm surprised there wasn't a flashing lime green marquee on a red background.
Posted by: Onymous | September 16, 2007 2:54 PM
The Flood:
strong enough to carve the grand canyon in hours.
gentle enough to leave dinosaur tracks in the mud.
Also contains a color safe bleach alternative.
Posted by: octopod | September 16, 2007 3:07 PM
All going the same way? Haven't they ever heard of the Hairy Ball Theorem?
(Andrés at #9, apologies if this was already what you were going for...)
Posted by: Graculus | September 16, 2007 9:49 PM
I guess Alberta is using it's oil money to become like a southern state.
How many years have we been calling it "Texas North"?
Hell, there's an old Aislin cartoon of a "Welcome to AlbertA" billboard... all the "A's are KKK hoods.
Posted by: sengkelat | September 17, 2007 7:23 PM
The Royal Tyrrell is awesome. I've never seen so many mounted dinos (the most in North America under one roof, I believe) and they have a decent amount of extinct marine reptiles, too, which is unusual. It took me two days to go through it all.
As for the California Academy of Sciences, I was given a tour of the not-yet-completed building, and it looks fantastic. I'm intending to take a few days off when it first opens to see it all. I'm hoping I can wait an entire year without my head exploding from the excitment of it all.
Posted by: cornucrapia | September 18, 2007 3:39 PM
I went there. I regret going. I agree with PZ, don't bother. I tried having a discussion with the proprietor, he dismissed me out of hand and only pointed to his displays as a form of response. It also costs more than the Royal Tyrell (which I just got back from) which is a total travesty since the Tyrell is huge, amazing and full of REAL science.
Posted by: Ritchie Annand | September 19, 2007 3:24 AM
If we had access to your discard pile, we would probably never have to come up with our own blog entry topics again :)
We also have many spots that cater to people yearning for an "Old West" experience, and we've got quite a few small towns willing to share old, quaint notions and experiences with visitors... like horse-riding, ranches, aluminum wiring and creationism.
Posted by: Robert Madewell | September 23, 2007 3:25 PM
Zeno, Smith is actually buried next to the Christ of the Ozarks statue with his wife. There's a loud speaker playing old hymns 24/7 next to the graves. It's really creepy. My parents took me there to see the statue for the first time in 1973 when I was 5. My parents tell me that I was terrified of the thing. I always wondered why I would be scared of it. Now I know why. I just read Smith's wikipedia page. He was a nasty old hateful fart. He was a holocaust denier too! There are too many just like him right now in northern arkansas.
Posted by: Tim Darney | April 26, 2008 12:30 AM
Nice musings. This museum is close to where I live. Shudder.
Another good museum that is 'close' to this one is
http://www.tumblerridgemuseum.com/index.html
which is just south of Dawson Creek, British Columbia (about 8 hour drive west of Edmonton, Alberta)
summary - 8 years ago some young boys found some great dinosaur tracks. They aren't all facing in the same direction!