Pharyngula

Remember Jeff Gannon?

I’d almost forgotten, myself. But look, Gannon shows up in the virtual flesh at Denialism to try and defend his record.

Trust me on this, Jeff. You want us to forget your sleazy softball approach to fake journalism. You aren’t helping yourself by reminding us.

Comments

  1. #1 John McKay
    October 29, 2007

    He posted the same little essay at my place (http://johnmckay.blogspot.com/2007/10/truthiness-at-fema.html). It looks like he’s going around pasting it into the comments anywhere that his name was linked to the FEMA fraud.

  2. #2 inkadu
    October 29, 2007

    Let’s not talk about Jeff Gannon’s flesh, please.

    kthx

  3. #3 Dustin
    October 29, 2007

    Virtual flesh is Gannon’s area of expertise, after all.

  4. #4 minimalist
    October 29, 2007

    Of course he wants everyone to remember. He’s promoting a book, after all, and seems to be of the “no publicity is bad publicity” school of thought.

  5. #5 Milo Johnson
    October 29, 2007

    He’s still a cock-headed man-whore.

  6. #6 CalGeorge
    October 29, 2007

    Hooray for the Hoofnagles!

  7. #7 Hank Fox
    October 29, 2007

    Here’s a paragraph from Gannon’s page:

    Some will recall that Media Matters waged a jihad against me for asking President Bush about how he would deal with Hillary Clinton and Harry Reid who seemed “divorced from reality.” WARNING: I own the trademark for this phrase and will take legal action to prevent its unauthorized commercial use. Harry Reid and other Senate Democrats signed a letter urging any number of Congressional investigations into my activities as a White House reporter, an unprecedented violation of the First Amendment.

    I wonder if it’s possible for someone to research the gummint office that deals with trademarks, and find out if Gannon truly owns the trademark for “divorced from reality.” And then it would be interesting to find out how you can trademark a phrase that’s been in use for … well, a FEW years anyway.

    Regarding Gannon/Guckert’s former profession, he makes me think of those Log Cabin Republicans, the gay Republican group who were so Divorced from Reality (TM) that they believed the GOP valued their allegiance and input. He’s over there in the land of frantic conservatives, people whose lips automatically twist into grimaces just being in the same room with him, thinking that if he hates liberals enough, that will somehow wash away the taint and they’ll actually like him. Or maybe it’s just all about the money.

    Anyway, reading through the posts on his page, I notice that whether he has the commercial rights to the phrase or not, he does seem to have a lock on being Divorced from Reality (TM).

    Maybe he really does own the trademark.

  8. #8 shiftlessbum
    October 29, 2007

    I wonder if it’s possible for someone to research the gummint office that deals with trademarks, and find out if Gannon truly owns the trademark for “divorced from reality.”

    Apparently he does

    http://tess2.uspto.gov/bin/showfield?f=doc&state=bdjj5.2.1

  9. #9 Rey Fox
    October 29, 2007

    I say PZ ought to trademark the word “crackpot”.

  10. #10 shiftlessbum
    October 29, 2007

    I say PZ ought to trademark the word “crackpot”.

    Or “demented fuckwit”

  11. #11 stogoe
    October 29, 2007

    Guckert may be the greatest exemplar of the failures of modern journamalism, but at least he didn’t beat Dubya to within an inch of his life with a latex dildo (that we know of).

    Maybe he should get working on that. I bet he still knows a few back doors into the White House…

  12. #12 Rey Fox
    October 29, 2007

    The Gannon roast over at that Denialism link is truly beautiful.

  13. #13 Jeff Gannon
    October 29, 2007

    Old Media Ablaze Over Staged FEMA Presser

    Liberal activists and the Old Media are aghast and outraged over a press conference conducted last Tuesday by the Federal Emergency Management Agency. Reporters were only able to listen to a department spokesman respond to questions about relief efforts for the California wildfires posed by other members of the FEMA staff. Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff appropriately chastised the sham press conference and promised an investigation and disciplinary action and the White House expressed its displeasure with the incident.

    Surely no one at FEMA believed that the staged event would not immediately be discovered and criticized. What could the motivation have been for such a stunt? Perhaps FEMA wanted an opportunity to present its version of events before the Old Media created its own reality about the fires and the actions of the agency. News consumers had already listened to reporters making comparisons to the federal response to Hurricane Katrina and attempting to find fault with the handling of relief efforts. California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger had to take ABC’s Claire Shipman by the hand to convince her that everything possible was being done and that she should stop trying to invent mistakes and shortcomings. Senate Minority Leader Harry Reid and other environuts demagogued the tragedy as evidence of the effect of global warming, while California Democrats like Sen. Barbara Boxer and Lt. Governor John Garamendi incorrectly claimed that relief efforts were impeded by having troops and equipment in Iraq.

    One of the lessons learned in the wake of Katrina is how the unaccountable Old Media are able to create a false impression that their ideological soul mates in the Democratic Party use for political advantage. In my book, “The Great Media War: A Battlefield Report”, I detail the flawed coverage of one of the greatest natural disasters in American history – a record that has yet to be corrected.

    When I learned of the fake news conference, I expected that the characterization of Jeff Gannon as a “phony reporter” would be revived. Liberal media activist Keith Olbermann noted it on his nightly train wreck of a talk show and the lefties of the blogosphere dutifully repeated it ad nauseum. This is a classic case of how a lie becomes reality, since the record proves otherwise. I was as real as a reporter gets, writing over 500 articles as a White House correspondent, a job that Secret Service records indicate I actually showed up for more than 200 times over the course of two years. The veracity of my work as a reporter has never been successfully challenged.

    Further, in 2006 – a year after my supposed exposure as a “phony reporter” – my peers accepted me into the National Press Club, the most prestigious association of professional journalists in the world. My book about the media will be featured at the National Press Club’s 30th annual book fair on November 1. Not bad for a “fake, fraud and phony.”

  14. #14 Jeff Gannon
    October 29, 2007

    Jeff Gannon Book Selected for National Press Club Book Fair

    ‘The Great Media War: A Battlefield Report’ Featured At 30th Annual Event

    WASHINGTON, October 16 /Standard Newswire/ — A book by former White House correspondent Jeff Gannon, “The Great Media War: A Battlefield Report” will be among those featured at the 2007 National Press Club Book Fair. The National Press Club is the world’s most prestigious association of professional journalists. The November 1st event is the 30th annual book fair and benefits the Eric Friedheim Journalism Library at the National Press Club.

    Jeff Gannon, the first exclusively online reporter to cover the White House on a regular basis is considered a New Media pioneer. He notes that his daily readership of more than half a million topped the circulation of most newspapers, despite reporting for a small news outlet. Gannon points out that since his tenure at the White House nearly every news entity has launched an online presence.

    Gannon chronicles his two years as a member of the White House Press Corps and reveals his role in the Valerie Plame affair and the scandal that toppled Dan Rather from the CBS News anchor chair as well as the historic defeat of Sen. Tom Daschle in 2004. He also offers a rare behind-the-scenes look at the White House Press Corps, led by the legendary Helen Thomas.

    Gannon weighs in on the left versus right, liberal versus conservative debate that he dubs “The Great Media War”. He contends that the struggles between those opposing ideologies play themselves out on radio, television and in the newspapers every day and determine how news is reported. Gannon also sees the Internet as the next front in The Great Media War and discusses its effect on the future of journalism and news reporting.

    Gannon writes about his experiences after asking one of the most famous questions ever posed by a reporter to a president. He explains “The Question” and speculates as to the reasons the reaction to it caused a nationwide sensation.

    Gannon has something to say about nearly every member of the Beltway media establishment as well as many Washington politicians. His book is replete with evidence of pervasive liberal media bias well beyond the point of questioning whether or not it exists. Gannon proves the point with words directly taken from the lips of his colleagues.

  15. #15 Dustin
    October 29, 2007

    Gannon proves the point with words directly taken from the lips of his colleagues.

    Bakabakabakachika-BOWWow.

  16. #16 Rey Fox
    October 29, 2007

    Surely the real Jeff Gannon isn’t this oblivious.

  17. #17 Dustin
    October 29, 2007

    Jeff Gannon is a spambot? It’s all so clear now…

  18. #18 Stevie_C
    October 29, 2007

    He’s certainly a talented selfpromoter.

    Just remember he’s a top not a bottom.

  19. #19 Hank Fox
    October 29, 2007

    “Pervasive liberal media bias.”

    Ha, bloody Ha. I’m picturing a dozen lions ripping into a still-struggling zebra, simultaneously roaring piteously about zebra bias.

    Every large news medium in the US is owned, operated and directed by a multinational – and conservative – corporation.

    If there WAS a liberal bias, the powerful Bush/Congress/Supreme Court triumvirate would have only needed to slap a few corporations around and things would have changed fast. They wouldn’t need to attack and demonize powerless voices of dissent.

    All this constant and loud beating up on the evil liberals is just a old Nazi trick – a political sleight of hand to draw attention away from the ongoing vicious and unAmerican power grab. Watch the left hand flutter and flourish in the spotlight while the right hand reaches out in the shadows to steal your wallet, sell your kids into economic slavery, trample the environment flat, and rip the guts out of your Constitution.

    Gannon, you may have been born and raised in America, but you damn sure never UNDERSTOOD it. If you’re even capable of caring about it, what will you do on the day you realize whom you’ve allied yourself with, and what you’ve done to your country and your people?

    But then again, if the Big People will only accept you, give you a small place at the table, maybe you’ll do literally anything for them? Carry a gun in the military, stab your nation in the back, is it all the same to you?

    Good luck with this new career choice. It will be interesting to see how much – or how little – you get out of it.

  20. #20 David Marjanovi?, OM
    October 29, 2007

    That can’t be the real one (the one who occasionally entered the White House twice in a row without leaving in between, and who occasionally left the White House twice in a row without entering in between… so say the records). At least I want to assume that a reporter and National Press Club member would show a little bit of objectivity, wouldn’t erratically switch between referring to himself in the 3rd and the 1st person, and would know how to spell ad nauseam (which is derived from nausea).

    But the whole affair is deeply ridiculous in any case.

  21. #21 David Marjanovi?, OM
    October 29, 2007

    That can’t be the real one (the one who occasionally entered the White House twice in a row without leaving in between, and who occasionally left the White House twice in a row without entering in between… so say the records). At least I want to assume that a reporter and National Press Club member would show a little bit of objectivity, wouldn’t erratically switch between referring to himself in the 3rd and the 1st person, and would know how to spell ad nauseam (which is derived from nausea).

    But the whole affair is deeply ridiculous in any case.

  22. #22 David Marjanovi?, OM
    October 29, 2007

    LOL! Found in the Denialism Blog thread:

    [disemvowelled for spamming advertisement of book by creepy fake reporter/male escort]

    That’s the book “Th Grt Md Wr” mentioned above.

    There are several more fun comments over there, including gems like:

    The tags attached to the dipshite’s book over at Amazon include “as balanced as fox news”, “bird vomit”, “creative writing”, “fantasy”, “horrible”, “lying”, “right-wing rage”, and “throbbing gristle”.

  23. #23 David Marjanovi?, OM
    October 29, 2007

    LOL! Found in the Denialism Blog thread:

    [disemvowelled for spamming advertisement of book by creepy fake reporter/male escort]

    That’s the book “Th Grt Md Wr” mentioned above.

    There are several more fun comments over there, including gems like:

    The tags attached to the dipshite’s book over at Amazon include “as balanced as fox news”, “bird vomit”, “creative writing”, “fantasy”, “horrible”, “lying”, “right-wing rage”, and “throbbing gristle”.

  24. #24 Leon
    October 29, 2007

    Just remember he’s a top not a bottom.

    That would explain his irrepressible urge to spin the situation.

  25. #25 blf
    October 29, 2007

    As Mark has pointed out in the denialism thread:

    (1) The FEMA fool who organised the fake news briefing has lost his job.

    (2) And that shows Gannon (ne Guckert) is talking bollocks when he claimed “no one at FEMA believed that the staged event would not immediately be discovered and criticized”.

    Is “deluded fuckwit” too polite a term for this nutjob?

  26. #26 Nix
    October 29, 2007

    Oh, wow. Check out the customer images at the Amazon page for his book. Whoever it was that uploaded one of Gannon/Guckert’s oh-so-sultry male prostitute pictures deserves some kind of medal. 🙂

    (I’m still trying to work out just what the `throbbing gristle’ tag represents — OK, I have an idea, I just hope I’m wrong — and why it’s shared with _20 Jazz Funk Greats_. Once I’ve figured that out I guess I can figure out why both this book and Hubbard’s odious _Dianetics_ are tagged with `bird vomit’.)

  27. #27 Hank Fox
    October 29, 2007

    (1) The FEMA fool who organised the fake news briefing has lost his job.

    Are you sure about that? Just today I saw an interview that said he either had been or was being promoted.

    As far as I’ve heard so far, everybody in government who’s said anything about the issue has said they’re disturbed, they’re shocked, it was wrong, it was bad … and they’re “investigating.” None of them even hinted that someone might be fired.

  28. #28 Ichthyic
    October 29, 2007

    Once I’ve figured that out I guess I can figure out why both this book and Hubbard’s odious _Dianetics_ are tagged with `bird vomit’.)

    hey, chicks dig bird vomit.

    really, they just eat it up.

  29. #29 Kseniya
    October 30, 2007

    Now THAT is funny! 😀

  30. #30 Ichthyic
    October 30, 2007

    *whew*

    I was afraid it might go down the wrong way with the non ornitohologically oriented, and I sure didn’t want to have to explain it.

    😛

  31. #31 Ichthyic
    October 30, 2007

    …ornithologically, anyway. damn stubby fingers.

  32. #32 Kseniya
    October 30, 2007

    I was afraid it might go down the wrong way

    Ah. I see… *snicker*

  33. #33 Ichthyic
    October 30, 2007

    *bows*

  34. #34 blf
    October 30, 2007
    The FEMA fool who organised the fake news briefing has lost his job.

    Are you sure about that?

    I provided a link to Reuters. Mark in the denialism thread provided a link to CNN. From the Reuters story (italics added):

    U.S. official in fake reporters flap out of job
    Mon Oct 29, 2007 7:27pm EDT
    By Randall Mikkelsen
    WASHINGTON (Reuters) – A Bush administration official whose department had government workers pose as journalists in a news conference has been dropped from a planned new job as media chief for the top U.S. spy agency.
    The Office of the Director of National Intelligence said on Monday that John Philbin, who until last week was external affairs director of the Federal Emergency Management Agency, would not be taking up a similar job with the intelligence office.

    That is, he left FEMA and has lost his new job.

    What is not known is whether he jumped or was pushed (i.e., resigned or was fired).

  35. #35 Ray C.
    October 30, 2007

    #7, #8: That link doesn’t work. Try this one.

    Idiots at the PTO…

  36. #36 Langdon Alger
    October 30, 2007

    A shame Jeffy seems to have run off. I wanted to ask him what Karl Rove was like in the sack.

    Sorry.

  37. #37 David Marjanovi?
    October 30, 2007

    Hmmmm. That’s registered to “Jeff Gannon” and not to “James Guckert”. Did he officially change his name? If not, is it really registered to him…?

  38. #38 David Marjanovi?
    October 30, 2007

    Hmmmm. That’s registered to “Jeff Gannon” and not to “James Guckert”. Did he officially change his name? If not, is it really registered to him…?

  39. #39 blf
    October 30, 2007

    That’s registered to “Jeff Gannon” and not to “James Guckert”. Did he officially change his name?

    According to the Wikipedia article, “James Guckert” is his birth name, and “Jeff Gannon” is a pseudonym.

    There are some suggestions his use of a false name to obtain access to White House press briefings was a security breach, and one of–but not the only–reason he was eventually bounced/resigned/whatevered. Gannon ne Guckert claims the Secret Service knew his real identity. There’s a nice summary in the denialism thread:

    He brags that Secret Service records show his 200 entries at the Bush White House under a false name, but fails to mention that those same records do not show him ever leaving the WH; or that he frequently was present on days when no press events were scheduled. What he was doing there during those times has never been accounted for.
    Investigations into how security failed to stop a person from gaining regular entry under false pretenses into the White House and remaining there for extended periods were quashed by James Sensenbrenner and other Republicans.

  40. #40 Paul Crowley
    October 30, 2007

    Wow, I didn’t know Google news search did so much. A quick Google archive search

    http://news.google.co.uk/archivesearch?q=%22divorced+from+reality%22&btnG=Search+Archives&um=1&scoring=t&as_ldate=1900&as_hdate=1940

    finds that phrase in use in 1931:

    that diagnosis I believe to be superficial and distorted and wholly divorced from reality

  41. #41 Azkyroth
    October 31, 2007

    “Gannon?” Please tell me someone with graphic arts talent has photoshopped a picture of this guy getting beaten up by a skinny blond boy in a green hood…

  42. #42 Ichthyic
    October 31, 2007

    What he was doing there during those times has never been accounted for.

    oh, i think the recent history of rethuglican “outings” has made it quite clear what a male prostitute was doing there.

    teaching them how to stand wide and toe-tap, of course.

    😛

  43. #43 shpx.ohfu
    October 31, 2007

    trying to work out just what the `throbbing gristle’ tag represents =Slang for an erection.

  44. #44 Pyre
    November 2, 2007

    Fake journalist? Try fake Amazon book reviewer, giving his own book at least one five-star review under the pseudonym “DC Patriot” (note the profile ID “jdg172”, cf. Gannon’s real name “James Dale Guckert”), an ID that has reviewed no other books, but has uploaded two images — posed photos of Gannon. The “review” itself consists of Gannon’s own publicity release, as he posted on this blog and elsewhere.

    That’s a violation of Amazon’s rules, isn’t it?

  45. #45 Pyre
    November 2, 2007

    Oddly enough, two other reviewers who gave Gannon’s book five stars have reviewed no other books at all; this was their sole action on Amazon.

    “Read Between Lines” claims to be from Falls Church VA.

    “AnImpressedliberal”, just like “DC Patriot”, claims to be from Washington DC. Interesting name, since it implies he would be impressed, as a liberal, by everything to which he posted a review. That, or his name was created just for this review.

    What can it all mean, I wonder.

    Surely Gannon would never try to pump up his Amazon rating using sockpuppets!

    Why, that would be wrong!

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