Pharyngula

Om lingalingalinalinga, kilikili

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The laughing fellow on the left is Sanal Edamaruku, president of Rationalist International and atheist. The cranky old man in the robes on the right is Pandit Surinder Sharma, a self-described Tantrik Magician. The scene is in a studio on Indian television, where the magician is trying to kill the atheist with sorcery. Sharma had said he could kill anyone with sympathetic magic inflicted on a doll made of dough, and that he could accomplish this in a mere three minutes … so Edamaruku confidently offered himself as a victim. The old fake went on for hours and failed.

After nearly two hours, the anchor declared the tantrik’s failure. The tantrik, unwilling to admit defeat, tried the excuse that a very strong god whom Sanal might be worshipping obviously protected him. “No, I am an atheist,” said Sanal Edamaruku. Finally, the disgraced tantrik tried to save his face by claiming that there was a never-failing special black magic for ultimate destruction, which could, however, only been done at night. Bad luck again, he did not get away with this, but was challenged to prove his claim this very night in another “breaking news” live program.

Edamaruku obliged and willing went to his “doom” that night.

The encounter took place under the open night sky. The tantrik and his two assistants were kindling a fire and staring into the flames. Sanal was in good humour. Once the ultimate magic was invoked, there wouldn’t be any way back, the tantrik warned. Within two minutes, Sanal would get crazy, and one minute later he would scream in pain and die. Didn’t he want to save his life before it was too late? Sanal laughed, and the countdown begun. The tantriks chanted their “Om lingalingalingalinga, kilikilikili….” followed by ever changing cascades of strange words and sounds. The speed increased hysterically. They threw all kinds of magic ingredients into the flames that produced changing colours, crackling and fizzling sounds and white smoke. While chanting, the tantrik came close to Sanal, moved his hands in front of him and touched him, but was called back by the anchor. After the earlier covert attempts of the tantrik to use force against Sanal, he was warned to keep distance and avoid touching Sanal. But the tantrik “forgot” this rule again and again.

Now the tantrik wrote Sanal’s name on a sheet of paper, tore it into small pieces, dipped them into a pot with boiling butter oil and threw them dramatically into the flames. Nothing happened. Singing and singing, he sprinkled water on Sanal, mopped a bunch of peacock feathers over his head, threw mustard seed into the fire and other outlandish things more. Sanal smiled, nothing happened, and time was running out. Only seven more minutes before midnight, the tantrik decided to use his ultimate weapon: the clod of wheat flour dough. He kneaded it and powdered it with mysterious ingredients, then asked Sanal to touch it. Sanal did so, and the grand magic finale begun. The tantrik pierced blunt nails on the dough, then cut it wildly with a knife and threw them into the fire. That moment, Sanal should have broken down. But he did not. He laughed. Forty more seconds, counted the anchor, twenty, ten, five… it’s over!

This sounds fun! I’ve been getting email lately from creationists telling me I should die, I should be fired, I should suffer horribly, but all they do is whine that they’re going to mumble to their god to have me destroyed. They should take a lesson from their Indian brethren and start using flash powder and chanting nonsense syllables — it would be no more effective, but it would be much more entertaining.

Comments

  1. #1 David Marjanovi?, OM
    March 24, 2008

    James Randi does a wonderful expose of this kook om JREF. Not content to be being made look like a complete tosser on national TV this idiot went back a SECOND TIME for another woo woo “attempted murder”. Some people just never ever learn.

    I shouldn’t laugh so loud at this time of the night between such thin walls.

    (Assuming the neighbors haven’t gotten used to it by now, that is.)

    Re ‘asphyxia resulting from extreme laughter’, seriously, from the description of that nutter’s antics, it almost sounds like maybe that had been his plan all along.

    That’s it. Consider this a Molly nomination.

    Ahh, that’s why it didn’t work. These rituals were developed to get rid of those white Western folks like the Portuguese and British who invaded India several hundred years ago. They are gone now, so obviously it worked.

    :-D

    Maybe it was Edamaruku’s atheism that saved him. I picture a scene ala Pratchett’s heaven in _Small Gods_. The countdown is ticking away and Sharma’s god is frantically searching around the god hall so he can kick Edamaruku’s god’s butt, but *He can’t find him!* So Edamaruku lives.

    Man, am I undereducated. :-o

  2. #2 David Marjanovi?, OM
    March 24, 2008

    From the original article:

    The whole program is video-recorded and is available. If you want a copy, please contact: info_desk@rationalistinternational.net

  3. #3 Physicalist
    April 24, 2008

    More crazy believers in magic. This one penis theft.

  4. #4 m?rc m?rc m?rc m?rc m?rc
    December 31, 2008

    thank’s

  5. #5 ?iir
    March 24, 2009

    thanks

  6. #7 Hosting
    March 27, 2009

    Edamaruku is that Uri Gellar wasn’t helping out the tantrik chap.

  7. #8 forum
    March 29, 2009

    Thank You

  8. #9 mirc
    March 29, 2009

    Thank You For This Topic