Pharyngula

At least he is soliciting sex from the mother instead of the students. This must be some progress for Christian morals.

Posted by: Blair T | April 18, 2008 9:23 PM

Quoth the spiritual leader:
"You know, it wouldn't take me long"
Probably based on feedback from his wife.
Hilarious!

Posted by: Norm | April 18, 2008 9:27 PM

#1: Not only was she of age, it was also a heterosexual scandal.

Progress indeed.

Posted by: iwdw | April 18, 2008 9:37 PM

Check out the amazing exercise in CYA going on over at the Parkview Christian School website. As usual, they are portraying themselves as the victims, and, in a display of pure balls, are insisting they are the ones owed an apology. School director Barbara Jordan (what relation to would-be lothario Lavern, I wonder?) whines:

Channel 13 chose to run a piece slandering our school's name and reputation. They filmed our school doors, sign,and phone number, but did not have the professional courtesy to interview me, although I called the station manager and informed him of a falsehood...

Furthermore, we would like to add that the woman in question did not handle the situation properly. Had she called to inform me of this incident, the matter would have been handled promptly and properly....

In other words, like the Catholic Church, keep it all hush-hush, fire the guy on the down low, but don't let the public know what kind of scumbag he is, so that he's free to go off and get another job and sexually harass women there.

Channel 13 and the woman in question owe Parkway Christian School, Inc. a public apology for the unjust manner in which the incident was handled. My family, students, and school should not have to suffer the blame for something that we did not know was happening.

Typical crybaby Christian persecution complex. The only person who might owe your school an apology is Lavern Jordan. He's the one whose actions embarrassed you. All the reporter did was his job, alerting the public to a public menace, or, at the very least, an ethically dubious person who has no business working in a school setting, Christian or otherwise.

Do they all have an innate sense of victimhood over in Jebusland?

Posted by: Martin | April 18, 2008 9:41 PM

Yes, I just tripped the irony meter by including a grammatical mistake in my previous post. Blech.

Posted by: syntyche | April 18, 2008 9:44 PM

syntyche: Not tripping the irony meter, just confirming Hartman's Law of Prescriptivist Retaliation.

Posted by: j | April 18, 2008 9:56 PM

"We already know whose (sic) driving." Ok, I was going to watch the video--but the grammar gods tainted it with that quote...

Thats Houston media for you.

You mean that's Houston media? ;^)

Seriously, keep in mind that the text on the website is probably a transcription of the reporter's voiceover, no doubt done by some intern. As such, I wouldn't be too hard on it for mixing up two homophones... a fairly easy mistake to make.

The generally cheesy character of the report, though -- the "exploding" lead-in graphics, the hokey Hebrew-ish font on the story title, the reporter's pruriently breathless tone -- was more troubling. It's been >20 years since I lived in Houston, but I remembered the media there as a bit more professional (other than Marvin Zindler, of course, who was always a cartoon character).

Nothing about the tone of the story, though, mitigates its pathetic, disgusting content. My outrage is mixed with a sort of perplexed sadness that this bozo, having had a moment of realization that his original proposal was immoral, still thought "playing around" with this woman in a parked truck was a reasonable thing to suggest.

Posted by: Bill Dauphin | April 18, 2008 10:10 PM

Check out the amazing exercise in CYA going on over at the Parkview Christian School website

Typical example of the pathetic, dishonest, hypocritical tactics of the self-righteous flim-flam artist.

Posted by: Kerry Maxwell | April 18, 2008 10:24 PM

I meant San Angelo, of course. I shouldn't post while drinking.

Posted by: kvinther | April 18, 2008 10:35 PM

#12 genegalore - ding-it! Post a warning before you sing that. *middle aged women strap on the Depends*

Posted by: Patricia C. | April 18, 2008 10:41 PM

Hey I wasted 8.50 seeing Expelled tonight. I snuck some video and I think some people might be interested in seeing the cell animation they ripped off of XVIVO.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppgzLR4HUzA
It's here... for now.

Posted by: Abbie | April 18, 2008 10:45 PM

Very disappointing. I would have expected much higher academic standards from Houston, home of the "Texas miracle" that gave George W. Bush such tremendous education cred when he took office in 2001.

Posted by: Wicked Lad | April 18, 2008 10:49 PM

#20 - You're missing the point, namely, that hypocritical holier-than-thous constantly bleat how their belief system makes them morally better than everyone else, and that it's a requirement to have any sort of morality at all.

Stories like this just show that they're no better than anyone else, and in many cases, is being used as a cover for their depravity (do you need reminding of how many Catholic priests were convicted of raping and/or molesting children?)

Posted by: Kevin Dorner | April 18, 2008 11:08 PM

Abbie - that's brilliant! Now all we need is to consult their lawyer to find out why you're posting this to YouTube is perfectly okay under "Fair Use." LOL.

Someone needs to point out to me the part in the Bible where it says "And if you breaketh My commandments, cover thine ass." There's got to be another part of that explaining that "Thou shalt cover thine ass thoroughly, and not leave telltale hints of thy covering, such as "daughter of and Mrs Jordan." What spectacular morons.

Posted by: Dana Hunter | April 18, 2008 11:11 PM

... (other than Marvin Zindler, of course, who was always a cartoon character).

Sure, but how much greater would this piece have been with Zindler on it?

Posted by: Will K. | April 18, 2008 11:23 PM

Once again, so what? People by their very nature are hypocritical to some extent. I can't honestly say this means anything in the larger context of religion. Worst case scenario it proves the necessity of the "Bless me father for I have sinned." thingamajig.

All it means is people are imperfect. There is such a big broad world of criticisms to bring down upon religion, from the non-evidence of deities, to contradictions in text and transmission, to simple inconsistencies between separate moral tenets. Why focus on a handful of largely discredited idiot's? It's like criticizing modern day psychology over Freud, it's fucking pointless. It's not like psychologists will fall to their knees en masse and thank you for pulling the scales from their eyes. Then you wonder why the religious just refuse to listen: It's because it's a pile of nonsense they've either already repudiated, or never believed in the first place.

Also, what the Jolly Green Giant does the Pope have to do with any of this? Different sect of Christianity, different situation completely.

(And yes, I know psychology and religion are too very different things, it's called an analogy, they all fall apart at some point)

Posted by: angrynight | April 18, 2008 11:37 PM

Hey, at least he's not a paedophile...

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.

And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...

For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.

So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath

Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.

And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...

Posted by: Moses | April 19, 2008 12:02 AM

I like how the ad at the beginning had Howie Long picking up a couple of guys in his truck under the banner "Sex offer caught on tape."

Posted by: merkin j. pus-tart | April 19, 2008 12:04 AM

Good story, but I hope you don't seriously consider this a valid reason to stay away from all Christian schools. There are plenty of other good reasons. They teach kids that fairy tales are true, they provide poor training in critical thinking, and they stifle curiosity. They teach that their religion is right, and other religions and ideas are a threat. They distort science by forcing it into a God-shaped box. They deprive their students of exposure to diverse students and teachers. I attended respected Christian schools, but I wouldn't send my kids there if they paid me.

Sex scandals and other bad behavior, however, can happen anywhere.

Posted by: charley | April 19, 2008 12:10 AM

All he wanted to do was show her his "spiritual bone".

Posted by: Doug | April 19, 2008 12:33 AM

But... but... but... Christians are so moral! This can't be! It's trick photography! No! He was possessed...

Yeah.. That's it. He was possessed.

Personally, I think we should point and laugh at these Christians more.

Posted by: Dan | April 19, 2008 12:37 AM

As for your two idiotic posts, you, like most religious defenders fail to realize you're the ones out there doing the "holier than thou" shtick day-in, day-out. Yet you get divorced more, rape children more, commit more sex and general crimes, kill more people, start more wars, and generally treat people like buckets of shit.

You are an ignorant nitwit who couldn't use that "dangerous thought" to save a fish from drowning. I link to my blog to give people some idea of where I'm coming from, not to pretty up the comments section with a pretty blue iridescent link. You don't have to read the boring thing, just look at my links and blogroll, and I assure you there is no superstition in it.

I'm being slightly facetious but my point is valid, this has nothing to do with religion. I happen to concur with Charley. People are capable of not being particularly enamored of religion and still not throwing everything at the wall to see what sticks. It's called thinking critically.

Posted by: angrynight | April 19, 2008 12:42 AM

Send your kids to a catholic school it turned me into a firm-nonbeliever

Posted by: gsmoove | April 19, 2008 12:50 AM

It's called thinking critically.

Posted by: Tulse | April 19, 2008 12:58 AM

This guy is sick no doubt. And of course nothing like this ever happens in public school. It's not like teacher's solicit and actually follow through with innapropriate relations with the parents students.

Posted by: HG | April 19, 2008 1:00 AM

of course nothing like this ever happens in public school

Of course it does, but then again those schools don't claim to "utilize a program based on Christian character, morals, values, and integrity." It's the hypocrisy, stupid.

And speaking of stupid, here's a fun game: count the number of grammatical and spelling errors on the main Parkway Christian School page. I make it seven.

Posted by: Tulse | April 19, 2008 1:20 AM

Ignore this 'angry night' troll - he's simply looking for hits on his own, very clearly and justifiably avoided, blog.

When you ain't got nothing,
you got nothing to lose.
You're invisible now;
you got no secrets to conceal.
How does it feel, 'angry night'?

Posted by: Sioux Laris | April 19, 2008 1:25 AM

@ angrynight,
Yes, hypocrisy and sexual. . . let us say, overexuberance, are common to all types, but as has been pointed out, the man invokes his spirituality as a reason he believes what he is doing to be wrong. The mitigation of "just playing around" is hypocrisy turned into hilarity. This man blatantly asks to "fuck" (I assume that the deleted word beginning with "f" is fuck) a woman, and later apologizes for perhaps making her uncomfortable, but still wats to "play around" behind a hotel!
This is simply funny (as the woman was not hurt, and was aware of what she was doing), the part about him being the founder of a Christian school is just a bonus!
It seems like shooting fish in a barrel, but the fundies continue to insist that, not only are they not fish, but there is no barrel!
Fire away.

Posted by: Autumn | April 19, 2008 1:33 AM

aaaand I posted it on the wrong thread.

Posted by: James F | April 19, 2008 1:37 AM

When I say it's not beyond an atheist to perform the same stunt, I mean precisely that. Religion doesn't enter into it.
Posted by: angrynight | April 19, 2008 12:04 AM

The statement above is absolutely true, but does not address the main point of the post. Any human born on this earth is not beyond these sort of temptations, but to claim that religion doesn't ever factor into these situations is false. The way that religion does factor into things like this is the fact that in a religious world-view, certain individuals are set up by their followers to be further from reproach than the members of their flock. While this also happens in secular environments (i.e., sexual harassment and propositioning in a private sector company), the fact remains that in a religious setting, these sexual offenders are very often protected from that reproach due to their standing as an authority figure supported by some form of divine doctrine, which - by the very definition of divine - is unassailable from a worldly standpoint. This is proven by the fact that we will NOT accept conduct of this nature by individuals in a secular setting, but will somehow still recognize the divine authority of a figure that does the exact same thing behind the protection of their faith. (And Catholic priests are not alone in these sorts of crimes - the current case in Texas is proof positive of that statement. And before someone states that these cases are always brought to justice, first realize that this fact does not help the victims that were abused prior to the legal system's ability to reach them - their parents, through their religious beliefs, were confident in the view that nothing was wrong with such actions.) Just to be clear, I am fully aware that this individual case may have been an isolated individual abusing his power as an administrator, but it is a fact that prior religious prestige or position definitely does offer a modicum of protection for these same types of offenders in situations involving such crimes when they occur within the bounds of church authority.

Posted by: brokenSoldier | April 19, 2008 1:39 AM

Nice to know your news channels are covering all the important issues. Sure this is lowdown and sleezy and the guy needs to be busted, but in case you hadn't noticed your economy is in the toilet, your president is a buffoon who (a) denied knowing anything about torturing people (b) denied that the US tortures people, (c) instructed people to torture people, and (d) pissed all over your constitution, you're mired in a couple of worthless wars of aggression simply so a bunch of billionaires can siphon a few extra billion from your taxes (and those of your children and grandchildren), you haven't had an honest election in a few cycles, and you're living in a corporate/police state.
So, like I said, it's good to see the news is all over this guy.

Posted by: AlanWCan | April 19, 2008 1:43 AM

Sure, sure, our country is in the toilet, we know; that's why we have such an emigration problem. People are just leaving here in droves! It's really worrisome so we have to displace our anger and anxiety by picking on this poor Christian schmuck. Would you prefer that we kick the dog?

Posted by: Elizabeth | April 19, 2008 2:01 AM

Sure, sure, our country is in the toilet, we know; that's why we have such an emigration problem. People are just leaving here in droves! It's really worrisome so we have to displace our anger and anxiety by picking on this poor Christian schmuck. Would you prefer that we kick the dog?
Posted by: Elizabeth | April 19, 2008 2:01 AM

Well, except for this...

"The nation's immigrant population (legal and illegal) reached a record of 37.9 million in 2007. "

http://www.cis.org/articles/2007/back1007.html

If you meant that JOBS are leaving here in droves, I'd agree. And in answer to your question about kicking the dog... If the dog in question propositioned my mother for sex in exchange for educating her child, then yes I would. (Would you let me put on some heavier boots first, though?)

Posted by: brokenSoldier | April 19, 2008 2:21 AM

Trolling is people who set things up so a comment section goes to hell (figuratively speaking). They distract from the subject matter of the post and get everyone emotional. Imay have done the latter by accident, but I am on topic. I'm disagreeing with the idea that every pervert is also a religious nut/ somehow tied to religion. I freely admit to being a little facetious (as in the prostitution remark, which was stupid on purpose), but that was my mistake.

I'm also astounded that there was such a knee-jerk reaction to my comments, I'm suddenly a blathering theistic scoundrel. I feel like I'm chasing my tail on this one Look, I'll make my argument abundantly clear to everyone -sarcasm:

1.People screw up. It isn't always pretty, and sometimes it's downright criminal.

2.Religion may be a hundred different things, all or most of which are evil- or not. However, this incident can only identify the high profile hypocrisy in one man, while I remind you we all act against our ethics from time to time to various extents. If you want to make the argument that most religious people are hypocrites, the lot of them, the burden of proof is with you to demonstrate willful mass-mendacity on the part of the faithful.

3.

Of course people are people and we all behave foolishly at times, but I do believe religion enters into it. It teaches people to compartmentalize their thinking. The real and the ideal become disparate (the ideal being what they want to believe is true) and they behave in ways contradictory to their ideal without seeming to realize it.

That's an interesting hypothesis, but I think this guy was just horny, it's impossible to say whether he bothered to rationalize it at all. She agreed to get in the car with him (albeit for the hidden camera), and while it wasn't the best thing anyone has ever done, he didn't exactly leap on her. Neither of us can know his mental state at the time. This is what I mean by critical thinking, there is a lot left to the imagination, but the facts are quite simple. Being skeptical means not putting stuff in the gaps to fit your predispostions.

Finally, I sensed a bit of trollishness in my first few comments, though I'm not so sure I crossed the line, if I did, it was unintentional. Unfortunately jumping up and down saying I'm not a troll can only make me sound more like a troll, but look, we're on topic having an argument. Not the worst of things I've done online.

Posted by: angrynight | April 19, 2008 2:25 AM

No problem with public schools, I attended and so do my children. Just pointing out the obvious.

Posted by: HG | April 19, 2008 2:33 AM

Finally, I sensed a bit of trollishness in my first few comments, though I'm not so sure I crossed the line, if I did, it was unintentional. Unfortunately jumping up and down saying I'm not a troll can only make me sound more like a troll, but look, we're on topic having an argument. Not the worst of things I've done online.

I have to agree with angrynight here. Not about the issue-I think (s)he's totally out to lunch by apologising for this douche.

However, (s)he's taken the time to explicate and defend a position. I don't consider that trolling.

Posted by: Brownian, OM | April 19, 2008 2:39 AM

angrynight,

It seems that you don't consider the fact that many of the religious claim that their religiousity is a necessary condition for morality. Your claim is that it obviously isn't sufficient. However, like most actual phenomena, the relationship between religiousity and morality isn't so simply ascertained.

For those of us who are constantly accused of being incapable of morality due to our (lack of) beliefs, this apparent relationship must be investigated. Further, the religious invite this investigation by claiming the moral high ground that they do.

Thus, your argument that this man's actions shouldn't be compared to the moral claims he and others sharing his belief system make is incorrect.

Posted by: Brownian, OM | April 19, 2008 2:55 AM

"Yes and if it were a snooty, exclusive, secular, private school attached to Harvard and the same thing happened, then Harvard would have SOMETHING to do with the situation. "

Posted by: angrynight | April 19, 2008 2:37 AM

I agree with you - and by saying it had something to do with the situation, I meant that, and only that. I didn't mean to imply that religion served - in this case - as a systemic cause of this man's actions. I merely meant to point out that religion may have factored into this man's belief that he could get away with it - I didn't intend to insinuate that religion was a sufficient cause for what he did. (And for the record, I didn't intend for my response to convey the opinion that I believed your comments were trolling. If I came across that way, I do sincerely apologize. I'm actually enjoying the exchanges and the discussion of the minutia of the situation. Believe me, today of all days, I have had my patience tested by some of the troll community's finest...or worst, whichever way you look at it, I guess.)

P.S.: And if it WERE a snooty Harvard administrator that committed this act, I'd be inclined to shove a year's worth of his school's tuition cost (in silver change, of course) up his least comfortable point of bodily entry. Coming from a well-known (even infamously so) poor neighborhood in Memphis, TN, I have a special disregard for intellectual and financial snobbery - not to mention the combination of both...

Posted by: brokenSoldier | April 19, 2008 3:04 AM

I think this thread has strayed a bit off point (that could never happen on teh intertoobz, right?):

I think there is a linkage between moralistic suppression of sexual desire (e.g., by conservative religious folks) and an increased risk of sexual misconduct, and I also think there is an extra dimension of culpability for sexual misconduct by those who preach conservative sexual mores to others (but note this doesn't meant sexual misconduct isn't still misconduct even when not accompanied by hypocrisy)... but there is, IMHO, something entirely different going on in this case.

If this were a real Christian school and its ostensibly chaste founder/headmaster were extracting sexual favors from parents in return for admission, that would be reprehensible for all the reasons stated in the thread above. But the evidence suggests that this is neither a real Christian school nor even a real school. It's apparently an inherently fraudulent enterprise, trading on burdensome and wrongheaded public education policies that create a market for the sale of phony diplomas. I doubt Lavern Jordan's "Christianity" is anything other than part of the role he's playing for this particular con game, and if by some chance he is a sincere Christian, he already qualified as an FSM-damned hypocrite for being a fraud and a thief, long before he tried to crawl into this poor woman's pants.

It's probably a whole different discussion, but the economic "space" for this sort of scam is a perfectly predictable outcome of the conservative program to bankrupt and ultimately eliminate public education through draconian "reforms" like NCLB. But I digress....

I'm sure there are plenty of genuine religious schools in Texas, some of which are no doubt relatively inoffensive despite their church affiliations and some of which are no doubt horrifying fundie nightmares. I have no idea whether sexual misconduct by teachers or administrators is more common in these schools than in public schools -- after all, "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God," eh? -- but criticizing religious hypocrisy about sex in no way excuses sexual abuse in public schools. They're just two separate issues.

In addition, liberal attitudes about sex and sex work don't excuse this guy's behavior. Personally, I don't have a moral objection to prostitution per se (presuming that it's truly consensual): If this woman were a prostitute by her own choice, and if this guy were her customer, and if she freely chose to spend her earnings on her son's tuition, I wouldn't have a problem with any of that. In this case, however, she's not a prostitute, and he's trying to get sex from her by holding something she values (her son's phoney-baloney diploma) hostage, and that is sexual harrassment bordering on rape, regardless of what you think about the morality of prostitution in the abstract.

Got it?

Posted by: Bill Dauphin | April 19, 2008 3:10 AM