Catching up

I'm home after a 10 day absence, which means … catching up with a backlog of work and mail. I just got back from my office, where a stack of packages was awaiting me — publishing companies keep sending me books to review, and it's getting a little daunting. There was a fine collection of gems in this stack, though, which I'll get to later, after I've read them.

There was also this, though, which I don't know if I can read, since the tears of laughter and dismay keep getting in the way: several books and pamphlets pushing geocentricity. I'm not joking. These books, including He Maketh His Sun to Rise: A Look at Biblical Geocentricity, by Thomas Strouse, and A Geocentricity Primer and The Geocentric Bible by Gerardus Bouw, are very, very serious. Their primary argument is that the ancient Hebrews can be documented as believing the earth was the center of the universe (which I can accept without hesitation), that the Hebrews got their information directly from God (which I do not accept), and since God wouldn't lie, therefore the earth must be at the center of everything. Wacky astronomy then follows. I wonder if Phil got copies of these, too, or if they thought a biologist would be gullible enough to fall for their silly reasoning.

But enough about bad books. Here's the truly important thing I received in the mail this week:

i-b9109095b0daacff8e1238ab8363b5c6-pink_plush_octo.jpg

You're all so jealous right now, aren't you? I should heighten the envy by telling you that she is very, very soft and squishy, and she's going right into my bed.

Unfortunately, there was no name on the box, other than the company that made her! I've got email from someone saying they were going to send me something nice, but they weren't specific, so I need you to confess in the comments. Whoever sent this to me, let me know…and thanks!

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Wow, PZ, all those arms to hold you! Now if you can just keep Skatje from running off with her!

...several books and pamphlets pushing geocentricity.

Before too long, they'll throw germ theory out the window and you'll start getting books about God's wrath as the source of disease...

By brokenSoldier, OM (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Geocentricity, it's like the old Aggie joke "how many aggies does it take to change a light bulb? Answer: 4. 1 to hold the bulb & 3 to turn the room."

By Barklikeadog (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Why did someone feel the need to send you a stuffed bicuspid?

WANT! Could you please mention the company that made it? I definitely want to get my hands on one!

Least intimidating street gang leader ever.

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Cephalopod lurve!!!

That picture should definitely be used when anyone refers to Dr. Myers as a "militant atheist".

Before too long, they'll throw germ theory out the window and you'll start getting books about God's wrath as the source of disease...

Posted by: brokenSoldier, OM

Already being done. HIV/AIDS is big sky daddy's wraith against those icky gays.

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Why did someone feel the need to send you a stuffed bicuspid?

Funny that.

There is a book store in Germany, Thalia, that sells little parasite and bacteria plush toys. I want my own little trypanosome.

The pink thing is very cute. Does it have all it's legs? I don't like it when they make them with only 5 or 6.

Okay I laughed at the geocentricity, I was giggling at the cuteness... foolishly thought the comments would be safe and proceeded to snarf my coffee over the bicuspid comment.

This is a happy place. Unlike my sinuses, which should not be mixed with cream and sugar.

OTP, but
Cuttlefish sends his regards and some pics after a ~10 day absence.

You could probably re-interpret the evidence into geocentrism better than you could re-interpret biology as being "intelligently designed"--except for the inconvenience of the speed of light as the universal speed limit (tachyons which always went faster than light might get you out of that jam).

For one thing, speed is relative and it depends upon one's frame of reference for one to decide how to describe motions. Of course this argument also means that there's no absolute frame of reference for the geocentrists--but there is far more truth to the idea that motions are arbitrarily described than that evolution may be arbitrarily understood either as due to design or to known processes.

There is at least some sense to seeing the universe as revolving around us, then. There really is no sense in looking at the slavish re-use of parts for purposes for which they are not suited (wings made of legs) and calling that design. The trouble is that there are none of the obvious effects expected from design. Some of the effects expected from geocentrism are obvious (if easily explained otherwise).

So then I'd give the geocentrists marks for making better sense than the IDists.

Glen Davidson
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7

Already being done. HIV/AIDS is big sky daddy's wraith against those icky gays.
Posted by: Janine ID | June 9, 2008 12:44 PM

True - though I wonder what they hope to accomplish by laying such crap on people like PZ. It seems like they're just gluttons for widespread ridicule.

By brokenSoldier, OM (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

So then I'd give the geocentrists marks for making better sense than the IDists.

Glen Davidson

The ultimate in damning with faint praise.

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

#15 Serena,

I think they're made here.

They're photogenic and pathogenic!

It seems like they're just gluttons for widespread ridicule.

Posted by: brokenSoldier, OM

I see that you have noticed.

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

JamesF #22

Those are the ones!!

Lovely aren't they?

Very, very cute cephalopod, what species is it?

Hmmm, an anonymously sent stuffed Cephalopod... check it for transmitters. Seriously, though, that's a cute picture - definitely the kind you should send to creationists as a greeting card. A Cephalogram?

I've gotten a flyer from the geocentricity people too. I think it's because I subscribe to the New York Review. Every kind of weirdo wants their mailing list.

I should heighten the envy by telling you that she is very, very soft and squishy, and she's going right into my bed.

PZ Myers

I missed that the first time around. Will not the Trophy Wive get upset about this set up?

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

I mocked the geocentricity site a long time ago. My favorite part of the `primer' Is the explanation of epicycles, the observation that the planets seemingly do 'loop-the-loops' in the sky. The geocentrists explain it as follows: if you assume that the sun revolves around the earth, and every other planet except the earth revolves around the sun, you can exactly reproduce the epicycle phenomenon. In the process, you've got to flush pretty much all of classical physics down the toilet, though.

Glen wrote: "There is at least some sense to seeing the universe as revolving around us, then."

That's a bit too charitable, I would say, in part considering the epicycle example above. Certain aspects of relativity can be exploited in a shallow way to argue in favor of a geocentric view, but the geocentric view utterly fails when one takes into account all the details of planetary motion. In that sense, it isn't that much different from the creation/evolution debate: one can make a very shallow, superficial argument that sounds plausible to the uneducated listener, but any amount of digging will demonstrate how stupid the theory is.

You can also buy the plush microbes from ThinkGeek.

PZ, you have listened closely to make sure there are no ticking noises, right? Just to be on the safe side.

COsmas Indicopleustes argued the geocentric position around 550 A.D. Even then it was not the majority position, even among Christians.

Cosmas was significant because he had traveled in the Indian Ocean and brought back information about India, including pictures of its fauna. The giraffe and elephant are pretty close, but the rhino is modeled on a unicorn.

By John Emerson (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Well, since you can (if you wish) set any arbitrary point in the universe as your center with all other motion relative to it, a geocentric worldview wouldn't violate any currently known laws of physics, I think. Now, trying to argue that our earth has some special property (besides us being on it) should be THE center around which you do your calculations, as opposed to any other point, that's a stickier issue.

Least intimidating street gang leader ever.

Beat me to it. Now I have nothing to say. Other than - That is a painfully cute toy.

Unfortunately, there was no name on the box, other than the company that made her!

Kenny! i'll bet he's hiding inside it, biding his time, then at night he'll pop out and lecture you on NDEs when you least expect it.

Obviously, the entire universe revolves around me

I was not going to bother commenting on "geoinsanity", as PZ's cuddly octopus tended to take the edge off my rage, but after Broken Soldier and Janine noted the morons propensity for ridicule, the opening sentence now is beyond ignoring. "Of all the sciences, the holy bible has more to say about astronomy than any other." This statement can unleash a floodgate of the most caustic shit I can give it but it is so hot here in New England that I don't really want to add to the heat, as a lot of the posters know my reaction to this insane crap.! "Of all the sciences"! Of all the mindless crap!

Foolish geocentrists, heliocentrists, and galactocentrists. The centre of the universe is about 3 inches behind, and slightly above, my eyes.

This is obviously true because my awareness is always in the same place, even though the rest of the universe moves around to present different views.

When Bishop Berkeley asked if a tree falling in a forest made a sound if there were nobody to hear, my answer would have been "What forest?".

I'll miss you all when I'm gone, if you still exist.

By DiscoveredJoys (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

I definitely think that should be the profile picture.

By astroande (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

I second #40

Someone should have sent him a battery-powered plush specimen of Nautilidae; then he could say he got an electro-N-cephalogram...

Thanks, I'll be here all week. :)

By Interrobang (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

I am so jealous!! ^_^

John Emerson @ #33, aren't you mixing up your geocentrists and flat-earthers? Cosmas was a flat-earther, I believe.

By Dave Empey (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

I wouldn't kick him (er, it) out of MY bed....

oh noes! Don't sic the Trophy Wife on me! ;-)

AiG seem to endorse this geocentric nonsense without actually having the guts to say so. A view that they have been promulgating is that the world is 6000 years but the rest of the universe is billions of years old (how else could we see starlight from billions of light-years away?). They explain this by arguing that time passes more slowly on earth since it is at the center of a "gravitational well".

Of course they don't bother to show that their math works; i.e. if they make certain reasonable assumptions about the distribution of matter, plug the assumptions into some relativistic formula and get out some answers that 6000 years have passed on earth while 3 million years (or 27 million years or 110 million years) have elapsed in the Large Magellanic Cloud, and so on. No predictions at all.

We're expected to take it on faith that the arithmetic will all work out. What a surprise.

stuffed bicuspid

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought it looked like some sort of dental-office prop!

By Bill Dauphin (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

After seeing this pic, P.Z., I couldn't help but imagine you to-squid as other people are to-Elvis -- i.e., you having this "room" in your house bursting with various squid-related objects. Or just having them all over the house, with people accidentally stepping on them, or sitting on them when they want to come over and take a seat on your couch...

You know, sort of like a squid version of Sanford and Son...

Just think: pay-per-view Big Brother reality TV? (KA-CHING!)...

Serena, these?

And I think Dirk is on to something.

The company is indeed Squishable. Sadly, they don't have platypodes, but there're hedgehogs, alligators, KIWIIIIIIIIIIS!!! and moosech much more.

If you get one, be sure so send them a photo. They usually donate a dollar to charity for each photo they get.

You're welcome. I'm glad she arrived safely. I didn't get any notification of her having left the premises. I thought you could do with a little stressrelief after the recent uptick in trolls and travel.

Awwww, cute :D

By Torstein Winterseth (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

What's her name?

By Pierce R. Butler (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Alex, I love it. I want one for my table! To heck with those plush toys.

By Barklikeadog (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

And, yes, I was indeed slightly worried that campus security were gonna sic the bombsquad on her ...

(Sorry for the dublicate link to the stuffed parasites I hadn't read far enough before posting. Here's a silverfish in the way of apology(be sure to to check out the gallery to see her other plushes - there're nudibranchs! (I gather some people here like those (how many parantheses can I nest before you assume I'm a creationist? (ah well, here's one more for good measure))))

(how many parantheses can I nest before you assume I'm a creationist? (ah well, here's one more for good measure))))

Posted by: Sili

That is not enough proof. You also need random capitalization and spelling PZ's last name as "Meyers".

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

You forgot calling him 'Mr.' instead of 'Dr.'

By Barklikeadog (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

gg @ #31:
Get ready for the next argument: You don't really have to "flush pretty much all of classical physics down the toilet," all you have to do is "teach the controversy," just like with ID. School science classes can teach scientific astronomy and physics (being careful to point out the Strengths and Weaknesses) alongside biblical astronomy and physics, and let the students decide which one they prefer!

By beagledad (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Thank you. I am sure there are others tells I have missed.
'giggle'

By Janine ID (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Wow. I'm torn. One side of me wants to say please, please recommend those books for publication, PZ, because I can't think of anything you, Plait, Miller, Forrest, Scott, etc... etc... could write that would better show the crackpottedness of the antiscience brigade. Let their own words speak for them.

The other, cynical side of me says someone will buy them and be converted. Blah.

Damn you PZ for stealing my girlfriend.

Neat. A smiling, pink, fuzzy, huge impacted-molar doll.

I want one!

What?

Oh.

Never mind.

When I grow up, I want to be a rock star, just like PZ.

is that a Squishable? Squeeeee!

(sorry, I went all girly there for a minute...)

By CanadianChick (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

beagledad wrote: "School science classes can teach scientific astronomy and physics (being careful to point out the Strengths and Weaknesses) alongside biblical astronomy and physics, and let the students decide which one they prefer!"

Gaaahhh!!! :O

I suppose this is part of the reason I spend a lot of time reading biology blogs: to prepare myself for the potential, if not inevitable, creationist attacks on physics!

Cosmas was also a geocentrist, I think, but to tell the truth I haven't read him very carefully. But he indeed was a flat-earther. And one of those who went on about the waters above and below the firmament.

By John Emerson (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Aquaria has the cutest one!!! EEE! I WANT IT! IT'S SO ADORABLE! It could totally be in a creepy tentacle rape hentai.

...wait, did I just say that? EW.

Aquaria has the cutest one!!! EEE! I WANT IT! IT'S SO ADORABLE! It could totally be in a creepy tentacle rape hentai.

And on that note...

The Squishable Octopus has, as its slogan, the following haiku:

Don't hide the schoolgirls,
this well-mannered octopus
just wants to be friends

By Owlmirror (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Ah, but Michelle,

The Squishable one has the great benefit of being in stock.

(And it's bigger too -- that might make a difference ...)

NOW I see your mistake Holbach. It is supposed to read 'astrology', bad spelling will do that.

Get a load of the Founder of The Association for Biblical Astronomy.

He's right though, look far enough in any direction and there is a red shift, EVERYTHING is moving away from us, so we MUST be at the center of the universe.

Dannnnnggggg PZ. a 45 dollar Octopus?! Someone has a big crush on you hahha

# 30: Will not the Trophy Wive get upset about this set up?

Now that's a Freudian typo if I ever saw one. But: Threesome!

I third # 40 and #12 too, and furthermore think that lovely creature should accompany you on whatever public platform you care to grace henceforth. It would give whole new dimensions to Fair and Balanced debate.

Maybe the Bible was right. Perhaps the Sun did revolve around the Earth. Note the was. Given the fickle nature of God as portrayed by the Old Testament perhaps he dropped geocentrism at some point and just didn't bother to tell anyone. Someone probably lost the bit of the original scrolls that said "And the Lord said on the eighth day 'Specifications subject to chance without notice.'"

Maybe it should take his place on conservative radio.

"And the Lord said on the eighth day 'Specifications subject to chance without notice.'"

"Past performance is no guarantee of future results"

By Owlmirror (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

That soft pink thing with the smile is so cute! I like the cephalopod toy too.

Ladies & gentlemen, the winner.

Maybe it should take his place on conservative radio.

Honorable mention.

By David Marjanović, OM (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Michelle sorta beat me to the punch... PZ, now both the plushie subset of the furries and the tentacle hentai types will be after you.

Beware the sexual fringe-dwellers on the tubes, dear professor, they'll nab ya!

By Longtime Lurker (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Why stop with geocentralism? From now on "Up" shall be defined as the direction that nelsons column is pointing!

It looks like a big, fuzzy TOOTH.

The Pink Octopus of Godlessness is available here. No, I didn't send it. But note the several pictures of people cuddling the octopus. PZ should totally be among them.

By BoxerShorts (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

You're all so jealous right now, aren't you? I should heighten the envy by telling you that she is very, very soft and squishy, and she's going right into my bed.

Um ... Actually, I'm not ... at all. It, er, nothing personal or anything, you're ... well, ... You're just not my type, PZ, that's all there is to it.

I hope we can still be friends though.

Owlmirror wrote: "Past performance is no guarantee of future results"

That sounds like an excellent tattoo to get, if I were the sort to get such things...

Rrr
i have problems sleeping too. Funny pics btw

By Cloudwork (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Also says times 7.55pm 09/06/08 here its 00.58 10/06/08

By Cloudwork (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

It's the Evil Atheist Conspiracy mind-meld.

... and how come no-one has yet said the "I, for one, welcome our new cephalopod overlords" line on this?! :-o

Clearly the cuteness-overload plan has got to you all such that you fail even to see its dominance.

That is an awesome picture.

CUTE!!!!

You look so sweet! That is just adorable!

I can't help but think of the popular images of ultra-Christians I get in the mail every so often. Those plastic grins, that "I'm gonna getchu" twinkle in their eyes. And then there's this - an expression that shows serenity, bliss, and one-ness with the universe.

I feel calmer just having seen it...

By Grimalkin (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

To Glen Davidson

There really is no sense in looking at the slavish re-use of parts for purposes for which they are not suited (wings made of legs) and calling that design. The trouble is that there are none of the obvious effects expected from design.

But re-use, even slavish, is design. Look at the one and only example we have of designers, humans. We re-use all of the time. And for pretty much the same reason evolution does: we have the machinery available to make those, we know what they do, etc. Of course what this actually means is that design, human design that is, is an evolutionary process.

By Matt Silb (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

Sure it's possible to mathematically construct a geocentric coordinate system but then you've got to contend with planets doing this:

Ptolemaic Model Simulation

By protocol6 (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

If planets other than Earth orbit the Sun, while the Sun orbits the Earth, why don't we see events such as the transit of Jupiter?

Or Uranus passing Venus?

I have one of the ones from Aquaria's (#20) link. They have very soft plush. Mine is wrapped around my rearview mirror. Gets in the way more than fuzzy dice, but soooo much nicer!

Heh. Mine arrived this past week as well. I guess we were in the same order pile.

It now occupies a place on the living room couch, astride the assorted plush Cthulus and a Shoggoth.

But re-use, even slavish, is design. Look at the one and only example we have of designers, humans. We re-use all of the time.

That's why I mentioned re-use for purposes to which the parts are not suited (one could argue that in some fashion legs are suited to be wings--yet clearly they are not nearly so suited as, say, re-using pterodactyl wings to make bat wings, rather than using mammal legs to make bat wings).

Human design may be evolutionary (far more so than one would expect of an omniscient being), but it is hardly like biological evolution.

Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7

Geocentricity = Conceit.

Pure and simple. The world - nay, the friggin' UNIVERSE - must revolve around such breathtakingly tiny minds.

Those physicists who enamour themselves of anthropic rubbish have nothing on these guys.

Sing along now: "We are SPECIAL, We are SPECIAL, Here we are, Here we are...

It's just about to make anybody hurl.

By Arnosium Upinarum (not verified) on 09 Jun 2008 #permalink

I'm more than a little pissed. Out there, for all the world to see, is a photo of our Evil Overlord (TM) cuddling something all pink, soft and compliant and .. it's not me. Bastard...my next evil overlord is going to respect me more as a minion who is undertaking his wanton global desires. I bet he'll have better ninja uniforms and all. And I bet he has a nicer volcano lair than Minnesota. Screw cephlapods..my next mission is to rule the world with.....MARSUPIALS.

By Bride of Shrek (not verified) on 10 Jun 2008 #permalink

James F wrote:

I think they're made here.

They're photogenic and pathogenic!

My sister (who insitentally is a biologist and cephalopod fan) has a bunch of those, and they're really adorably cute.

Alan Kellogg wrote:

If planets other than Earth orbit the Sun, while the Sun orbits the Earth, why don't we see events such as the transit of Jupiter?

Because Jupiter orbits the Sun at a greater distance than the Sun orbits Earth, meaning its never between Earth and Sun.

Geocentricity (as opposed to geocentricism, a genuine albeit discredited astronomical model) essentially consists of making an idiotic choice of coordinate system and loudly insisting that it's TEH TURTH!!!!111eleven1

By Andreas Johansson (not verified) on 10 Jun 2008 #permalink

Kenny! i'll bet he's hiding inside it, biding his time, then at night he'll pop out and lecture you on NDEs when you least expect it.

But PZ KILLED KENNY!!! You bastard! ;)

Hey, I'm soft and squishy too!

By pharyngula groupie (not verified) on 10 Jun 2008 #permalink

You blind fools!! This is proof--PROOF--that atheism leads to beastiality!!!

By CrazyFundie (not verified) on 11 Jun 2008 #permalink

Marek Eby, I totally want that image on a t-shirt.

Just got the latest newsletter from Squishable:

3) Thanks to everyone who sent in user pictures to help support the most awesome Heifer Foundation. You bought an impoverished family a sheep! And not the kind that's filled with stuffing... I mean the kind that squirts out milk and more sheep. Thanks!

And on that note, in honor of finally (finally) having Pandas, from now until the end of June we'll donate a buck for every user picture we receive to the Wolong Giant Panda Reserve (up to $250). They just lost a Panda in the China earthquake - give 'em a hand! Send your pics to HugMe@squishable.com.

So if you like pandas and have a squish send in those pictures!

Those massively-sized sized micro-organisms are, i'm afraid, no match for the wonders of the Subatomic Particle Plushies. Just, bask in their glory!
http://www.particlezoo.net/