How appropriate
Category: Weirdness
Posted on: October 12, 2008 1:22 PM, by PZ Myers
Have you ever noticed what the first result you get if you google for gift from god is? He does love us!
(via Evo Terra)
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PZ Myers is a biologist and associate professor at the University of Minnesota, Morris.
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Comments
Posted by: Kobra | October 12, 2008 1:32 PM
Haha. Epic win.
Posted by: Luftritter | October 12, 2008 1:44 PM
This is no surprise...
Everything is a gift from god (just ask a christian)
If it is not from god there is an easy solution: stoning.
Posted by: Lee Picton | October 12, 2008 1:46 PM
Among the other topics: Christian BDSM
I'll bet if they work on it hard enough they will find a way to sanctify christian pedophilia.
Posted by: Brad D | October 12, 2008 1:46 PM
Wow! I laughed my ass off at that site!
All I can think of now is "Every sperm is sacred, every sperm is great. If a sperm gets wasted, god gets quite irate."
Posted by: speedwell | October 12, 2008 1:48 PM
Hilarious site, parody with an earnestly innocent straight face, nearly pulled it off too. Hooray :D
Posted by: Brad D | October 12, 2008 1:52 PM
Yeah, I have to admit they had me going for a brief moment.
Posted by: Greg R. | October 12, 2008 2:00 PM
God helps those that help themselves.
Posted by: bigjohn756 | October 12, 2008 2:04 PM
Gosh, maybe I am a Christian after all.
Posted by: bigjohn756 | October 12, 2008 2:13 PM
O.K., I just went back and read some more at this wonderfully educational web site. If you haven't already done so, go back and read the readers' questions and answers. You will be further edified.
http://www.sexinchrist.com/reader.html
Posted by: Dust | October 12, 2008 2:15 PM
Gee, my Catholic upbringing consisted of "don't touch anything-it's nasty." Could that of been wrong?!?
Oh wait, this page if for Protestant Christians and other infidels..............
Nevermind.
Posted by: Flaky | October 12, 2008 2:17 PM
The masturbation bit had me fooled too. But the part about anal sex is a bit too much for a christian.
Posted by: Andrew G | October 12, 2008 2:19 PM
"Masturbating for the Glory of God"
Huh?
Posted by: tresmal | October 12, 2008 2:24 PM
Well, if that doesn't bring the readers of this blog back to God, I don't know what will. Off to "church"!
btw it's nice to see a little balance in the treatment of religion here. :)
Posted by: James | October 12, 2008 2:30 PM
"Johnny, what are you doing in there?"
"Nothing mom, just praying."
Posted by: Bob Vogel | October 12, 2008 2:43 PM
Anything that keeps prostate cancer at bay, I'm all for it at 52. Nice to see too its finally okay with god, despite my mother's frequent spankings. (not lately)
Posted by: The Chimp's Raging Id | October 12, 2008 2:45 PM
Funniest.
website.
Ever.
Seriously.
I may have to celebrate this gift god has generously bestowed upon us later...
Posted by: Sven DiMilo | October 12, 2008 2:51 PM
Makin' the scene with a
magazineBible opened to The Song of Solomon.(hey, remember magazines?)
Posted by: The Science Pundit | October 12, 2008 3:01 PM
I always thought that that was a gift from yourself, so I guess that everybody is their own god. Nice!
Posted by: Bob Vogel | October 12, 2008 3:08 PM
Every three days, fellow gents, every three days. ...One way or another.
Posted by: Burning Umbrella | October 12, 2008 3:14 PM
Interpreting the Holy Bible literally?
How dare they.
Posted by: Thomas | October 12, 2008 3:35 PM
"Fisting and God´s will"
Now there´s a subject for Kem Ham to tackle.
Posted by: C. M. Baxter | October 12, 2008 3:44 PM
Just like the banana; observe how conveniently it fits into your hand. The IDers might be on to something after all.
Posted by: info_dump | October 12, 2008 3:46 PM
@ #5: "...nearly pulled it off too."
Sounds like you're doing it wrong.
Posted by: imflyboy | October 12, 2008 3:59 PM
WOW! That's pretty sweet! Blowjobs, threesomes, fisting. Where do I sign up?
Posted by: Crudely Wrott | October 12, 2008 4:50 PM
With God, all things are justifiable.
Posted by: Cath the Canberra Cook | October 12, 2008 5:22 PM
Wow, this has been around for quite a while now. Usually googlehacks like that disappear fairly quickly, and I posted about this one on my fave message board (talkrational.org) several months ago now. Brilliant!
Posted by: Kel | October 12, 2008 5:29 PM
They just had to go and ruin masturbation for us!Posted by: Arb | October 12, 2008 5:33 PM
Don't laugh - teenagers - especially ones with restricted fundamentalist upbringings, are turning more and more to anal and oral sex thinking it's not "real" sex, therefore not prohibited. Nothing wrong per se with sex in all its forms, but health professionals are seeing more consequences of morally conflicted teens engaging in risky behaviours without condom use because they are thinking irrationally about their sexuality. I don't have my sources handy but I'm sure I can come up with some if you're interested.
(Arb - also known as Arbutus Grove and Arbutus Bark. I just can't decide on my on-line identity. sosume.)
Posted by: scooter | October 12, 2008 5:53 PM
**** WARNING **** WARNING **** WARNING **** WARNING ****
PZ, whatever you do with this gift from god, do NOT put a nail through it.
I just choke mine when it's being obnoxious.
Posted by: melior | October 12, 2008 5:59 PM
International readers' mileage (kilometerage?) may vary: "Gift" is German for poison.
Posted by: Benjamin Geiger | October 12, 2008 8:12 PM
Erm.
I think I'm going to call Poe on this one.
Posted by: bsk | October 12, 2008 8:21 PM
Obvious Poe. Nevertheless, the BDSM section is pure gold.
Posted by: JakeS | October 12, 2008 8:36 PM
I particularly liked the section on guidelines for Christian Porn.
Posted by: Another Primate | October 12, 2008 9:53 PM
Speechless!
Posted by: Louis Bérubé | October 12, 2008 10:20 PM
This makes far more sense than anything the moralists preach, and I'm serious.
Posted by: shane | October 12, 2008 10:35 PM
Any talk of wanking reminds me of the classic Derek and Clive sketch "Having a wank"...
Audio here...
http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=1DkuXBsHytE
Transcript here...
http://www.phespirit.info/derekandclive/come_again_14.htm
Posted by: shane | October 12, 2008 10:43 PM
And speaking of humour. There is a new series called "PG Porn". Touted for people who love porn but not the sex. This video preview stars Nathan Fillion of "Firefly" and "Buffy" fame and is called "Nailing Your Wife". Fracking hilarious.
http://www.spike.com/video/pg-porn-pg-porn/3041858
Posted by: Liam | October 12, 2008 10:44 PM
#32 - Obvious Poe is a self-contradiction
Posted by: Thadd | October 13, 2008 9:12 AM
I find this site blatantly insulting, as it seems to forget that I am the true gift from God.
Thaddeus
Posted by: tsg | October 13, 2008 2:45 PM
If god didn't want us to masturbate, he would have made our arms shorter.
Posted by: DLC | October 14, 2008 3:28 AM
Q: what does an atheist call out during mid-orgasm?
A: "ohh! Nothing! "
- Thanks folks,I'm here all week!