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7. Certain crimes are committed more immediately against God himself; others, against the state; and a third kind against certain persons. The chief crie in the first class, cognizable by temporal courts, is blasphemy, under which may be included atheism. This crime consists in denying or vilifying the Deity, by speech or writing. All who curse God or any of the persons of the blessed Trinity, are to suffer death, even for a single act; and those who deny him (sic), if they persist in their denial. The denial of a providence, or of the authority of the holy Scriptures, is punishable capitally for the third offence.
[1771 edition of Encyclopedia Brittanica, under Law: Tit. 33 "Of crimes"]
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« I'm sure it was a very solemn ceremony | Main | Colbert and Buttars »
Category: Pointless polls
Posted on: December 3, 2008 9:59 AM, by PZ Myers
In a story that discusses the astrological signs of Obama's cabinet picks (humorously, don't worry), there is a poll: Are you a believer in astrology? It's going in a sensible direction, let's just tip it further.
Yes...absolutely!
5%
Only when my horoscope comes true
12%
Eh...kinda sorta
14%
No!
67% 1
Not sure/No opinion
2%
YES! Send me a free issue of Seed.
If I like what I see, I'll receive 5 more issues (6 in all) for just $19.95. If I'm not completely satisfied, I'll simply write "cancel" on the invoice and owe nothing. The free issue is mine to keep.
(Non-U.S. subscribers, click here.)
Comments
Posted by: SC | December 3, 2008 10:06 AM
I like how the little bars on the response graph roll out after you answer (doesn't take much to amuse me).
Posted by: tsg | December 3, 2008 10:09 AM
I want an option for "No, but then I'm a Gemini."
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp, KoT, OM | December 3, 2008 10:10 AM
As soon as I finish reading these Lamb Intestines and kucklebones to decide whether to have ham or turkey for lunch... I'll get right on it.
Posted by: Joel | December 3, 2008 10:14 AM
DailyKos? No thanks.
Posted by: Coturnix | December 3, 2008 10:19 AM
wasn't there supposed to be a Tangled Bank today?
Posted by: The Petey | December 3, 2008 10:22 AM
I find astrology entertaining
Posted by: tsg | December 3, 2008 10:23 AM
I'm quietly waiting for the droves of astrologers to come try to tip it the other way while wondering if astrology worked, why didn't they see it coming and beat us there?
But then, my horoscope for today said, "You will meet a three-ton rhinoceros named Desmond."
Posted by: DGKnipfer | December 3, 2008 10:26 AM
The "No!" votes are up to 68% and climbing. Somebody's horoscope must not have come true.
Posted by: Graculus | December 3, 2008 10:30 AM
But then, my horoscope for today said, "You will meet a three-ton rhinoceros named Desmond."
The Onion?
They are always accurate.
I once had the "pleasure" of filing clippings from the newspapers. I put an extra "s" in "Astrology" for the header.
Posted by: James F | December 3, 2008 10:34 AM
Here's a poll that might interest you - and it could lead to some positive action, too.
Create nationally required science standards
National standards on the teaching of Evolution and the origins of life, decided on and created by top scientists from significant scientific organizations, should direct curricula of all schools nationwide, overriding any state laws on the subjects.
http://www.change.org/ideas/view/create_nationally_required_science_standards
77 votes. A Pharyngulization would hit it out of the park.
Posted by: tsg | December 3, 2008 10:34 AM
Douglas Adams. Salmon of Doubt if I remember correctly. Technically, it was Dirk Gently's horoscope, but we're the same sign.
Posted by: Scaryduck | December 3, 2008 10:44 AM
Aquarius: Don't have the salad.
Uh-oh.
Posted by: sjburnt | December 3, 2008 10:48 AM
Sorry - I will not waste my time on that blog.
Posted by: tsg | December 3, 2008 10:49 AM
Taurus: Opportunities present themselves while Mercury is in retrograde. Too bad you died yesterday.
Posted by: Rieux | December 3, 2008 10:58 AM
Not sure why the rancor here about DKos, but it isn't all that surprising that the readers of that site had tipped the poll in a relatively reasonable direction before Pharyngulites showed up. Kos's blog isn't exactly a haven for heavy religion/magical thinking/etc.
Posted by: Darth Wader | December 3, 2008 10:59 AM
This is not an occult science. This is not one of those crazy systems of divination and astrology. That stuff's hooey, and you've got to have a screw loose to go in for that sort of thing. Our beliefs are fairly commonplace and simple to understand. Humankind is simply materialized color operating on the 49th vibration. You would make that conclusion walking down the street or going to the store.
Posted by: mayhempix | December 3, 2008 11:03 AM
Now at
Are you a believer in astrology?
Yes...absolutely! 5% 282 votes
Only when my horoscope comes true 10% 550 votes
Eh...kinda sorta 13% 717 votes
No! 70% 3775 votes
Not sure/No opinion 2% 82 votes
Posted by: SC | December 3, 2008 10:06 AM
"I like how the little bars on the response graph roll out after you answer (doesn't take much to amuse me)."
The perfect woman.... ;^ )
Posted by: Glen Davidson | December 3, 2008 11:05 AM
As Behe said, if one believes that Theia crashing into earth and creating our moon is the result of design, why not the (apparently undesigned--this is not stated, but implied, in EoE) organisms on earth?
So one would think about any IDist ought to vote "yes" in the poll. And, it adds a dimension to his "astrology is (or at least was) science" crack at Dover.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
Posted by: Shaden Freud | December 3, 2008 11:08 AM
#16 Darth Wader wrote:
That sounds familiar....
Posted by: Gorelick | December 3, 2008 11:16 AM
Astrology, when used as kind of a Myers-Briggs scale to remind myself that people process the world differently, has been very useful to me.
Posted by: Chris Hughes | December 3, 2008 11:17 AM
"Cancer June 22 - July 22 : The stars apologize for last week's prediction of untold
fame and fortune. They keep forgetting that you actually believe in this crap." (The Onion)
Posted by: LisaJ | December 3, 2008 11:30 AM
I was also inspired to look up my horoscope on The Onion, and the eerie coincidence has made me want to change my vote from No to Yes... absolutely!:
Scorpio October 24 - November 21: Frustration will be yours this week when an airliner spirals out-of-control and crashes into the ground every time you're about to speak.
Now normally us skeptics would read something like that and say, surely they're being ridiculous on purpose, since this stuff is, you know, totally meaningless. But, I kid you not, there is a helicopter (close enough to an airliner) hovering over my apartment building right now, and it's been there for 5 hours now. What an uncanny coincidence... thank gawd I know not to open my mouth for the rest of the week or the Ottawa Riverside apartment tenants would be in some real trouble.
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp, KoT, OM | December 3, 2008 11:31 AM
And by differently when referring to astrology you mean stupidly.
Posted by: conelrad | December 3, 2008 11:52 AM
Pisces: Try to avoid any Virgos or Leos with
the Ebola virus.
You are the true Lord of the Dance, no matter
what those idiots at work say.
-from "Your Horoscope for Today"
by Weird Al Yankovic
Posted by: The Petey | December 3, 2008 11:56 AM
So one would think about any IDist ought to vote "yes" in the poll.
BUT...
Astrology is witchcraft and a tool of the Intelligent Designer's nemesis Sata,,,,,,
errrrr
ummmmm
The Cosmic Union!!!
Posted by: tariqata | December 3, 2008 12:00 PM
Astrology is bunk, but I hope that horoscopes continue to be published.
Case in point: a few months ago, I was discussing the impending maternity leave of my immediate boss with a couple of my colleagues. A. decided that he would also appreciate a year off (so to speak) and asked J. if she would kindly impregnate him.
J.'s horoscope that day, read aloud at lunch: "You will accept a strange request from a co-worker."
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp, KoT, OM | December 3, 2008 12:03 PM
Not according to Behe. It's a scientific theory!!
Posted by: skepsci | December 3, 2008 12:04 PM
Onion horoscopes for the win! One of my favorites:
(I'm a grad student studying math.)Posted by: woody | December 3, 2008 12:41 PM
People is the 'interpretatin' monkey.'
We "notice.' What ever else it may be, the brain is a pattern-making instrument. Given incidents, there will be co-incidences. I am not a 'believer.' Not in anything. Astrology basically recapitulates all the faults of any other 'religion,' absent a single actor, or "god."
Posted by: Riman Butterbur | December 3, 2008 12:45 PM
Leave me out of this. I'm a horoscopoholic; I can't touch the stuff.
Posted by: lytefoot | December 3, 2008 1:12 PM
Best horoscope I ever had was from the Onion: "Your philosophy is tough, but fair. When you say 'they should all be put in camps,' you really mean ALL of them."
Favorite astrology story: as a child I pirated some astrological software, the kind that casts the full 20-some page natal horoscope. I cast horoscopes using made-up birth-dates for fictional characters, which got me approximately the same hit rate as using actual birth-dates for real people. (Sadly, I grew up surrounded by newage wonks, who suggested that I must have great personal affinity for astrology to have made up the birth-dates so accurately.)
Posted by: tsg | December 3, 2008 1:22 PM
This sounds a lot like the "you really are psychic and don't know it" defense spouted by a lot of woos when it's been pointed out the "medium" they've been fawning over has been deliberately deceiving them to show how easily they can be fooled.
Posted by: ndt | December 3, 2008 2:20 PM
Why do people have a problem with the DailyKos?
Posted by: JCE | December 3, 2008 2:30 PM
"I'm an Aquarius, what's your sign?"
"Biohazard"
("Dangerously Reactive" also works well but goes over most heads)
Non-lab rats may wish to use street signs instead but watch out for the mixed messages you can send by selecting one like "Yield", "Dangerous Curves", "Speed Bump" or "Wildlife on Road".
Posted by: David in NY | December 3, 2008 3:06 PM
"Why do people have a problem with the DailyKos?"
Not sure. I think that distribution (which has improved its "No!" percentage some, is fairly standard for the site, which in significant part runs itself. There's about 70% perfectly sensible people, with the others tailing off from the mere soft-headed down to the 5% who are "absolutely" believers in the irrational. But if someone can't handle the views of plain folks, often with really populist views, it may turn them off.
Posted by: tsg | December 3, 2008 3:14 PM
"Stop"
Posted by: Cath the Canberra Cook | December 3, 2008 4:47 PM
RevBDC: if you're checking the lamb intestines & knucklebones for what to eat, the stars tell me that a lamb roast is a better choice than ham or turkey.
JCE: I do this, too! I mostly just say "No Smoking", though I also rather like "Falling Rocks Do Not Stop". May I also recommend "Slippery When Wet" and "Keep off the Grass" to the Pharyngula slut contingent? Pick the appropriate one, depending on whether the questioner is hot or not.
Posted by: BobbyEarle | December 3, 2008 7:07 PM
"Chains Required"
Posted by: The Petey | December 3, 2008 7:08 PM
"I'm an Aquarius, what's your sign?"
"Exit"
"Do Not Disturb"
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp, KoT, OM | December 3, 2008 7:10 PM
good point.
I'll grab the rosemary and garlic
Posted by: efrique | December 3, 2008 8:09 PM
We Aquarians don't believe in that astrology nonsense.
And we statisticians don't believe in unscientific online polls...
Posted by: The Perky Skeptic | December 3, 2008 8:32 PM
My favorite reply to "What's your sign?" is "Poor Impulse Control" :)
Love you, Darth Wader, for bringing up my FAVORITE SCENE EVER in A Mighty Wind!
Posted by: Lowell Gilbert | December 3, 2008 8:41 PM
I'm willing to believe that the time of year you were born could have an effect on how your life unfolds, even though the stars clearly have nothing to do with the effect. For example, being born right before (or after) the cutoff date for starting school in a particular year...
Posted by: Crudely Wrott | December 3, 2008 8:47 PM
The sign of astrology itself is, of course, Taurus.
Posted by: 'Tis Himself | December 3, 2008 10:22 PM
Aries: You will do something indescribable tomorrow. We'd tell you what it is, but it can't be described.
Posted by: DLC | December 4, 2008 1:45 AM
My star sign is IC 141?
My horoscope:
"you will not believe in Horoscopes tomorrow."
Someone once said they were dismayed to pass a newsstand and note that there were 22 magazines on astrology and only two on astronomy.