…and this is a 
I thought I knew of all the institutions of higher learning in my neighborhood, but I seem to have missed one: The University Of Metaphysical Sciences, located in the small town of Kandiyohi, Minnesota. I even know exactly where that is — it's just outside of Willmar, where my wife works every day.
You might be wondering what, exactly, you would learn at a University Of Metaphysical Sciences. Well, that isn't clear. You get to learn about Colors and Symbols, and Chakras, and how to connect with Angels (if I were younger, I'd be tempted to get a degree in that, just so I could use it as a pick-up line), and Miracles, and the Energy of Money.
How much does it cost? Tuition is a low, low $2000. It's even cheaper than it sounds, because they assure us that most students can complete a full Ph.D. program in only a year — it's so quick and easy, they even recommend that you get two doctoral degrees! I'm feeling slow and inadequate now…it took me five years to get just one.
What about accreditation? Well, accreditation, they assure us, is entirely optional and not necessary, but just in case, they do have accreditation from the American Alternative Medical Association and the American Association Of Drugless Practitioners. That really should count as just one, though: their webpages look identical, only the names, fonts and backgrounds have been changed, and they all trace back to the same small town outfit in Gilmer, Texas. They seem to be in the business of selling certificates to hang on a wall (only $285, they accept both Visa and MasterCard), so at least they seem to be UMS's peer institutions!
And just what can you do with a Ph.D. in Metaphysics? I wish I could say you learn how to fly, negate energy fields, and speak dolphin, but this is all you can do:
A degree from University Of Metaphysical Sciences qualifies a graduate to perform official ceremonies such as ministerial work, weddings, spiritual counseling, teaching, lecturing on the international circuit, credentialed book writing, setting up a spiritual center, and a variety of other services.
Isn't that just…fluffy? Makes me want to run down to Kandiyohi and, I don't know, piss in their mail slot or something. Or maybe explain to their students that their accrediting institutions are mail drops in Texas, that their degrees are completely worthless, that none of their credits will ever transfer to a legitimate college, and that no, a mail-order diploma from a joke like UMS does not give you any credibility on the international lecture circuit.
Comments
Posted by: tiktaalik | June 15, 2009 3:43 PM
I do want a PhD without all the work, though
Posted by: Owlmirror | June 15, 2009 3:44 PM
There's probably a course in mantra chanting.
"Owah taboo biyam"
"Owah taboo biyam"
"Owah taboo biyam"
"Owah taboo biyam"
Posted by: Wes | June 15, 2009 3:45 PM
What about my phd in Truthology from Christian Tech? That's still good, right?
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp | June 15, 2009 3:46 PM
Rev. BigDumbChimp, PhD. Doctor of Handwaving.
I like the sound of that.
Posted by: Wes | June 15, 2009 3:47 PM
From the site:
They also have a highly respected department of redundancy department.
Posted by: Glen Davidson
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June 15, 2009 3:50 PM
Better to just get a degree in theology. Same level of knowledge of anything perceptible in the end, but you get a lot more respect.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/6mb592
Posted by: Bob O'H | June 15, 2009 3:54 PM
we should band together and buy Wilkins a degree. I'm sure he'll thank us for it.
Posted by: --E | June 15, 2009 3:55 PM
Alas, a degree from there probably does give a person cred on the international lecture circuit...of woo. Though of course one could save the $2000 and simply set up their own school, have it accredited by the same mail drop for just $285, and issue oneself a Ph.D. in Metaphysics. (Hey, my first published short story was titled "MetaPhysics." I may already qualify!)
But wait, it qualifies the graduate to perform weddings! Is that as in "legally permitted to perform official weddings" like justices of the peace are? Or is that just conferring a proper amount of woo-based gravitas that they can now wave their hands properly, but the couple still have to get an official of the state to stamp all the paperwork?
Posted by: Holbach
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June 15, 2009 3:55 PM
Reminds me of the scene in a Futurama segment when a moron in a lab coat runs up and says to the van looking for doctorates, and the cretin says " I have a degree in homoeopathy", and a boxing comes out of the side of the van, and sends the moron flying with a voice saying "you have a degree in nothing". Good grief, they grant degrees in "theology", but there is no smashing glove to knock the cretins senseless, which is their natural state.
Posted by: Desert Son
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June 15, 2009 3:57 PM
Is that in BTUs given off by combusting bills, or in potential units of a giant sack of coins suspended, cartoon-anvil-like, above a poor, unsuspecting cell-animated coyote?
Meep, meep?
No kings,
Robert
P.S. Attention NSA agents: I do not endorse the defacement of government currency. Please return to your regularly scheduled observations.
Posted by: Acronym Jim | June 15, 2009 3:58 PM
For the low, low price of only $2000, you too can be trained to create your own cult. Your profit return is only restricted by the amount your soon to be followers are willing to pony up.
It's even BETTER than S
hcam-Wow.Posted by: Cuttlefish, OM | June 15, 2009 4:00 PM
Ok, so which is more highly valued--this diploma or the Official Creationist Worldview Professional Certificate! that PZ wrote about earlier? I may have to re-work my earlier verse:
A Creationist Certificate, on parchment or on vellum,
Is the perfect bit of pseudo-bling to hang upon your wall.
Your friends will think it’s beautiful (unless, of course, you tell’em
What it is) because it’s done by hand, calligraphy and all.
Your brain, of course, from frontal lobe to back of cerebellum
Will now seize itself in protest ‘til your prostrate form will sprawl,
As it tries forgetting all it knows about, say, the flagellum,
And your cranial activity reduces to a crawl.
Your science is now up-to-date (that date is Antebellum)
Cos you dropped a bunch of money on a worthless bit of scrawl.
http://digitalcuttlefish.blogspot.com/2008/09/certificate-of-lack-of-achievement.html
Of Science, Metaphysical, you now have your Degree--
It's a quality diploma (you can keep the crayons for free!)
Just a couple thousand dollars, and it's more than worth the fee
(Which is why we recommend that you invest in two or three)
It's important to remember, on the chance you disagree,
That we never ever ever give a cash-back guarantee.
Posted by: Cappy | June 15, 2009 4:00 PM
At graduation they hand you the idea of a diploma and you can go out and get a hypothetical job.
Posted by: Paul Lundgren | June 15, 2009 4:00 PM
The older I get, the more the real world looks like the Onion. This makes me sad.
Posted by: PZ Myers
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June 15, 2009 4:04 PM
A hypothetical job…in the Meta-Universe!
Posted by: tsg | June 15, 2009 4:09 PM
Ah, and here I was thinking the diploma was just your canceled check...
Posted by: Chris Davis | June 15, 2009 4:10 PM
Can you get particle metaphysics?
I rather fancy looking for the meta-Higgs. I assume it will just be a matter of closing your eyes and wishing.
Posted by: Steven Alleyn | June 15, 2009 4:11 PM
@#8 Here in Québec you can cut out the middle man and just buy a one-shot license to perform a wedding... Hell of a lot cheaper.
Posted by: 'Tis Himself
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June 15, 2009 4:16 PM
How do credentialed books differ from ordinary, supposedly uncredentialed books?
Posted by: tsg | June 15, 2009 4:16 PM
Yes, it's the study of bogons but not cluons.
Posted by: Greg B | June 15, 2009 4:17 PM
Hey people! I know this probably isn't the place, but it sort of ticks me off that the creationists are winning this faceboook poll 13k to 12k
tp://apps.facebook.com/livingsocial/micro/polls/111022/results
Posted by: Humanist | June 15, 2009 4:21 PM
Well..... I have been studying basic schools and Science past 20 years all my life. But charlatans, obscurantists, mystics making millions a year......
It shows peoples craving for imbecility.
Definitely these graduates would get what they aim at.
Posted by: Mike K | June 15, 2009 4:24 PM
Arrrghhh! Arrrghhh! .... screams incoherently for another five minutes...
I am currently writing my Ph.D. thesis (deadline:thursday) and it is going crappy, thanks for asking, but it is good to know there are other options left...
Tahnk you for the laugh PZ, was the first real one of the day (1023 pm in good old Germany).
Posted by: Brian's A Wild Downer | June 15, 2009 4:25 PM
Ha, i found some catalogs from these guys in my school once. I was pissed about it and in my communications class i gave a presentation about the catalog. I even pointed out their "two accreditations". My favorite part was that they actually have a class on Breatharianism!
http://www.breatharian.com/
No shit, this guy claims he doesn't need any food or water to live but can survive on just air and "earth energy"........and double quarter pounders with cheese and diet coke that comes from bottles.
Not joking, he claims that the ingredients in the double quarter pounder with cheese all vibrate at the right frequency to .... something. It's moronic.
Posted by: Kyle | June 15, 2009 4:28 PM
Muauahaha. I'm assuming this is my doing.
You get this from the guys in CASH, PZ? They have the pamphlets for this garbage here in Tempe and I showed it to them when they were here. Figured they'd get a good little laugh out if it like I did.
Glad you enjoyed it too.
Posted by: Alyson Miers | June 15, 2009 4:29 PM
They might as well just pull their credentials out of thin air. It would make them sound a lot less foolish.
Posted by: LRA | June 15, 2009 4:36 PM
Hello? Isn't the term "meta-physical science" a complete oxymoron? Well, what can we expect from a bunch of complete morons.
Posted by: Porco Dio
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June 15, 2009 4:37 PM
lol PZ,
if somebody pisses in their mail slot the golden trail is going to lead back to you!
Posted by: Lyndon | June 15, 2009 4:46 PM
I bet you learn more at UMS than you would in the "doctoral" departments at Liberty or Regent Universities (if there are any.)
Posted by: Qwerty | June 15, 2009 4:48 PM
The school song:
Here's to Metaphysical... Rah! Rah! Rah!
Don't say we are whimsical... Rah! Rah! Rah!
'Cause we know our school rocks, though it's just a PO Box!!
No caps or gowns at graduation... Rah! Rah! Rah!
Just use your imagination... Rah! Rah! Rah!
'Cause we know our school rocks, though it's just a PO Box!
So, come buy your Ph. D... Rah! Rah! Rah!
For a tinsy-winsy fee... Rah! Rah! Rah!
'Cause we know our school rocks, though it's just a PO Box!
GO UNIVERSITY OF METAPHYSICAL SCIENCES!!!!!
*massive prerecorded cheering*
Posted by: DonRocko | June 15, 2009 4:48 PM
PZ, you ought to issue your own honorary accolades to counter such vainglory. You could print them off with nice lettering, maybe something insulting in Latin... Issue them to whoever for whatever reason.
I mean, if I were a recent grad of "UMS" I'd be ecstatic to get an induction into the "Order of the Dupe" or a "Degree in Second-Rate Quackery" in the mail. Or just something fancy that says "You've Been Had - HA!"
Posted by: Qwerty | June 15, 2009 4:50 PM
The school song:
Here's to Metaphysical... Rah! Rah! Rah!
Some say we are whimsical... Rah! Rah! Rah!
'Cause we know our school rocks, though it's just a PO Box!!
No caps or gowns at graduation... Rah! Rah! Rah!
Just use your imagination... Rah! Rah! Rah!
'Cause we know our school rocks; though it's just a PO Box!
So, come buy your Ph. D... Rah! Rah! Rah!
For a tinsy winsy fee... Rah! Rah! Rah!
'Cause we know our school rocks; though it's just a PO Box!
GO UNIVERSITY OF METAPHYSICAL SCIENCES!!!!!
*massive prerecorded cheering*
Posted by: Victor
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June 15, 2009 4:52 PM
When the web page of the school you went to gets confused for The Onion ... you may be a metaphysicist.
Posted by: Qwerty | June 15, 2009 4:53 PM
Oh, oh, time for detention hall. I double posted.
Posted by: Tom | June 15, 2009 4:55 PM
"a mail-order diploma from a joke like UMS does not give you any credibility on the international lecture circuit."
Wouldn't that depend on which lecture circuit we are talking about? I'm sure there are people who would be very impressed with this particular degree and would welcome its holder on their lecture circuit. With luck you might even get a TV show dealing with UFOs or ghosts.
Posted by: Paul Burnett | June 15, 2009 5:05 PM
"-E" (#8) asked: "But wait, it qualifies the graduate to perform weddings! Is that as in "legally permitted to perform official weddings" like justices of the peace are?"
You can get ordained on-line for free by the Universal Life Church ( http://www.themonastery.org/ ) and (among other things) legally perform official weddings. - Reverend Paul
Posted by: melatonin | June 15, 2009 5:06 PM
lol, the founder (Christine Breese 'D.D. Ph.D.') has videos on youtube.
I'm the sauce apparently!
Posted by: Aaron | June 15, 2009 5:06 PM
As a philosophy student, I'm extra annoyed by this. I mentioned to a friend a while back that I was doing a paper in metaphysics and he looked at me sideways, thinking it was some new age thing like this "University of Metaphysical Sciences" looks to be, when that is absolutely not what it is. It's like when people who watch 'The Secret' use the word "quantum" in complete ignorance, thinking they're being profound. These counterfeits quite obviously don't know the meaning of the word 'metaphysics'.
Posted by: Erp | June 15, 2009 5:07 PM
A degree in theology would at least require some work that has potential uses elsewhere such as knowledge of ethics and philosophy and the ability to construct an argument (that the premises are mistaken is a different matter). Princeton Theological Seminary for instance has students study Hume, Kant, John Stuart Mill, Descartes, Locke. A prereq for entering the program are reading knowledge of two modern languages other than English (usually German and French).
Admittedly I believe that school has been known to produce a moderate number of atheists/agnostics at the end (Bart Ehrman is a graduate though not in theology).
Posted by: dedie | June 15, 2009 5:14 PM
In my university, Someone started putting up signs "Are they teaching you about the Super-Consciousness?" and some number to some cult. So I added with my pen "And how about the Tooth-fairy?" :)
Posted by: The Gay Species | June 15, 2009 5:15 PM
I would simply caution readers that philosophical metaphysics is NOT this crap. Analytic philosophy considers subjects like identity, language of numbers, sets, and other mental categories of thought with which we have a "shared conceptual idea," but is not religious, superstitious, or New Age.
Posted by: Ian A. A. Watson
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June 15, 2009 5:27 PM
The AAMA and AADP also share a phone number, it seems.
AAMA's is 1-888-764-2237, while AADP's is 1-888-764-AADP.
AADP on a dial pad is, of course, 2237.
Posted by: Ouchimoo | June 15, 2009 5:27 PM
ROLF @ Kandiyohi. Is that town even big enough for a fake university? No. Where is it at the church? I bet it's at some lil'ole lady's house who in the daytime sells garden ornaments.
Posted by: Steve | June 15, 2009 5:28 PM
Can't we use this type of thing to our advantage?
I'd love to have a degree in Ancient Languages from Miskatonic University on my wall.
Posted by: Skyhook | June 15, 2009 5:28 PM
My Legal Struggle with Christine Breese and the University of Metaphysical Sciences (UMS)
Posted by: littlejohn | June 15, 2009 5:28 PM
My second major in philosophy required a course in metaphysics. It was quite rigorous and largely woo-free. Don't confuse the mail-order crap with the real stuff from an accredited liberal arts school.
As I recall, we spent most of our time learning the logical errors in Aquinas and Anselm's arguments. I was already an atheist, but it better prepared me to defend my position.
Posted by: elece
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June 15, 2009 5:31 PM
I think Dr. Egon Spengler has a degree here, but can't remember if it's honoris causa.
Posted by: Sastra
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June 15, 2009 5:32 PM
Hey, they ask a great question:
And then, unfortunately, they answer it:
Hm, I'm not so sure about that definition of "science."
And I'm suspicious about those "many scientists" and their laboratory observations on The Secret.
And as for those "bewildered doctors," I'm sure there are even more "bewildered" friends, family members, and acquaintances who are being told by the U of Metaphysical Sciences graduates that they could easily beat their cancer or other debilitating disease if only their "attitude" wasn't so bad, bad, bad. So it's their own fault. Blame the victim.
That's the downside to the sweetness and light. Ok, that, and the fact that it's pretty much bullshit.
Posted by: elece
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June 15, 2009 5:33 PM
I think Dr. Egon Spengler has a degree here, but can't remember if it's honoris causa.
Posted by: Humanistic Jones
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June 15, 2009 5:41 PM
Tempting to actually get one. Look at how many creationists have some degree in a scientific field that they use to trump up their cred. They have a real degree in science, obviously they'd know when the science is bunk. We should get legions of skeptics with degree's in homeopathy ("YOU HAVE A DEGREE IN NOTHING!") out there speaking against those things. "Hey I have a doctorate in homeopathy, I think I'd know when it does and doesn't work."
Posted by: NewEnglandBob
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June 15, 2009 5:50 PM
We laugh at the "University Of Metaphysical Sciences", but can you just imagine the caliber of the students who actually for over $2000 for their worthless shit?
Posted by: GBJ
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June 15, 2009 5:56 PM
You Minnesotans don't have anything on us Wisconsinites. We've got the University of Lawsonomy located in Sturtevant, WI. And they even have a web site!
http://www.lawsonomy.org/
Posted by: Jim | June 15, 2009 6:11 PM
Hot damn! i am studing up my lawsonomy and gonna throw stuff down at the rest of you from my higher plane!
"God has decreed that mankind must move onward and upward to a much higher plane of intelligence than heretofore reached. Lawsonomy is the means by which mankind can reach that higher plane."
Posted by: NoGurus | June 15, 2009 6:23 PM
#19 'Tis Himself
Look at the loads of crap on the self help shelves and you will see the phony PhD credential plastered across many of these books, and some are best sellers. They make their money off the backs of the uneducated, the gullible, the young, the desperate and the sick. They commonly offer easy answers to complex questions and often have not a shred of verifiable research to back up their claims. They endorse each others books in a sick quid pro quo system of phonies endorsing phonies.
An example is mail order PhD John Gray (Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus), who is not recognized as a "psychologist" by the APA, and is not license eligible in any state. More examples are the so-called "Dr" credentials given to nefarious and sundry kooks on "The Secret" website, not a single one of whom is a licensed mental health provider. Buyer should always beware when seeing a "PhD" credential splattered accross the face of the book. These authors usually won't say in their bio inset where they got their "PhD," and if you don't know what school they graduated from, you can safely wager it's another phony PhD.
Posted by: DrKnow | June 15, 2009 6:33 PM
I just complete a degree there but I did it psychically from home in just a few hours by aligning my inner quantum harmonics with the the universal wavefront in resonance with my DNA and higher level Chakra of the blue spectrum...oh and Jesus and Elvis tutored me at one point. It was fab! I am working on my book as we speak.
Posted by: Arkady | June 15, 2009 6:38 PM
Wow, PhD in a year eh? And I thought I was on the fast track doing one in the UK in 3-4 years... which is now coming up on the end of the first year, with many seemingly insurmountable issues of protein purification [curses Sigma for changing their products so they no longer work]
Posted by: Mrs Tilton
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June 15, 2009 6:38 PM
Laugh away, but a PhD from UMS is at least as solid as the one earned by famous palaeobaraminologist Dr Kent Hovind (a man so important and respected that the US federal government itself has decided to absorb the costs of his food and lodging).
BTW, the guys who market all that Cthulhu stuff offer tshirts and hoodies from Miskatonic U's Dept of Metaphys. Ed. Which I for one would be proud to wear. Also.
Posted by: tim Rowledge | June 15, 2009 7:08 PM
Oh no, Mrs.T, you do realise that
will soon be transmutulated toPosted by: jsfb | June 15, 2009 7:10 PM
OMFG, I particularly liked these "courses":
BR318 Breatharianism
DO309 Dolphin Healing
ROTFLMAO!
Posted by: Mrs Tilton
|
June 15, 2009 7:12 PM
Tim @58,
when that happens, surely it will be a miracle that only goes to prove the wonder-working power of the Lord.
Posted by: DuckPhup | June 15, 2009 7:19 PM
My personal definition of metaphysics: "The blind leading the stupid into the unknown, on a quest for the unfathomable."
Posted by: Jedemy | June 15, 2009 7:21 PM
They've got a pretty qualified founder:
"She holds her Doctor Of Divinity Degree in Metaphysical Sciences, as well as her Ph.D. in Metaphysical Counseling."
Posted by: Zeno | June 15, 2009 7:27 PM
Well, at the very least, a doctorate from the University Of Metaphysical Sciences would entitle one to interact as a peer with "Dr." Kent Hovind ... but why would anyone want to lower himself that far?
Posted by: Snoof | June 15, 2009 7:40 PM
Peer? I thought Kent Hovind was in prison for tax fraud, not public urinat-
Ohhh.
Nevermind.
Posted by: Rob | June 15, 2009 7:43 PM
this is a joke
This question in the FAQ had me rolling on the ground
"How do I know this is a real degree and not a diploma mill?"
Posted by: Rob | June 15, 2009 7:43 PM
this is a joke
This question in the FAQ had me rolling on the ground
"How do I know this is a real degree and not a diploma mill?"
Posted by: Greta Christina | June 15, 2009 7:50 PM
So does an ordination from the Universal Life Church. And it's free!
Posted by: DLC | June 15, 2009 8:16 PM
What about a meta-analysis of Metaphysics studies ?
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp | June 15, 2009 8:31 PM
Where I got my "Rev." from.
Posted by: Acronym Jim | June 15, 2009 8:38 PM
Jim@53:
And a Happy Monkey right back atcha Jim!
Posted by: Patricia, OM | June 15, 2009 8:52 PM
Chimpy - I got a Rev. from there too, on a dare. Back in my pagan searching days I earned 'degree' after degree from several highly respected pagan "schools". It can make new agers turn pale, but means nothing in the real world, and has gotten me zip in the job market. Damn Margot Adler got there before me.
Posted by: Rob Jase | June 15, 2009 9:04 PM
I got my PhD in Medieval Metaphysics from Miskatonic U. the old fashioned way.
Went through a lot of goats too.
Posted by: Tim H | June 15, 2009 9:14 PM
You can tell that USM isn't a real educational institution quite easily- their basketball team hasn't ever even been close to making it into the NCAA Tournament. Or even the NIT. They probably don't even have a marching band. Even the Colorado School of Mines has a marching band. (They wear plaid flannel shirts, blue jeans, work boots, and hard hats. Or they did 20 years ago.) I wonder what kind of a school mascot USM should have?
Posted by: John Phillips, FCD
|
June 15, 2009 10:38 PM
@Greta Christina, thanks. I am now officially Reverend John Phillips :)
Posted by: Anonymous | June 15, 2009 11:24 PM
"the Energy of Money"
Reminds me of this fellow called "Master David" who blew through Frisco about fifteen years or so ago. His literature, which was a charming blend of Speed Freak and Acid Casualty, stated that the wanted prospective acolytes to supply him with -and this line has been etched in my memory all these long years- "the creative force of monetary energy".
Posted by: Krubozumo Nyankoye | June 15, 2009 11:35 PM
Lamentably this is far from the only instance of such pathetic shams. Just google Curtin University Earth Expansion or go to this URL:
http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&safe=off&num=50&newwindow=1&q=Curtin+university+earth+expansion&aq=f&oq=&aqi=
This kind of thing is troublesome to me because it exacerbates the already well known problem that science is designed to address, the difficulty of not fooling yourself. These efforts to promote patently ridiculous pseudoscience with a legitimate veneer of verbiage, superficial trappings, and citations to self published nonsense have multiple deleterious effects. Foremost being that they gradually obtain some traction with the so-called journalists and as a result are uncritically presented to the lay public as something of substance.
Luckily I am old and will not have to witness and take part in the ultimate corruption of the scientific enterprise by con men and hucksters, but that is their goal. Be assured of it.
Posted by: Chris Richards | June 16, 2009 12:24 AM
It's things like this that give my field a bad name. This isn't metaphysics, it's new-age mumbo jumbo. There's a very big difference, as many have pointed out. Real metaphysicians do hard work, thinking about hard issues. Why did these fools appropriate such a perfectly good word? Oh yeah, because it sounds respectable (it's got such a long history in European thought) and has the word "physics" in it!
Do you realize how hard I have to work to convince my family that I don't do this sort of stuff when I tell them I study metaphysics? Thankfully, real universities haven't succumbed to the poisoning of the word 'metaphysics' and almost every philosophy department around the country still offers courses in real metaphysics, taught by real philosophers.
Posted by: Citizen of the Cosmos
|
June 16, 2009 12:30 AM
Can anyone just use the "university" label and then presto it's a university? Don't you need to be approved by the government or something, to make sure you meet certain standards?
Posted by: David Harper | June 16, 2009 1:17 AM
Why waste your money on a metaphysics degree, when you can buy a Master's degree in Science (what else!) from the splendid Dr Science for only $3.75
As Dr Science says:
Posted by: Greta Christina | June 16, 2009 3:37 AM
#79: That is the best thing ever. I know what everyone's getting for Santamas this year. And it must be a good degree -- because he knows more than you!
Posted by: Draken | June 16, 2009 9:19 AM
Rector magnifica Christine Breese used to have a Wikipedia entry- for a whopping 4 days or so.
Bonus: check out her view on hurricane Katrina.
Posted by: Faithful Reader | June 16, 2009 9:34 AM
Darn it, Kandiyohi has always been one of my favorite Minnesota names. How sad to see it sullied.
Posted by: win | June 16, 2009 10:24 AM
What a joke they have for security (AAMA/AADP)!
I brute forced their encrypted javascript function on their login page (this is for the AADP) only to find out it evaluates to:
function chameleon_password(form) {
if (form.pass.value=="HHP1") {
location="members/index.htm"
} else {
location="invalid.html"
}
}
What a letdown; you don't even need a password, you can just go to http://aadp.net/members/ or http://joinaama.com/members/ and you're in. Granted, there's not much you can do other than look at the quakery in their newsletters.
Posted by: paaaf | June 16, 2009 11:13 AM
this kinda reminds me of this futurama video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swDpWNKB5Co&feature=related
Posted by: ursa major | June 16, 2009 11:20 AM
Calm down everybody and stop making fun of the University Of Metaphysical Sciences. You just can not "get it" when one suffers from the heartbreak of Mystical Retardation.
Now, as an aid to the gentle readers here, I am humbled to offer a Metaphysical Doctorate in Metaphysical Science from Ursa's Metaphysical University of Metaphysics. My school does not Suffer from the Burden or a mere physical campus - we offer a metaphysical campus and provide you with metaphysical texts, materials and friends! Just send the money and the energy vibrations from the check will reveal if you already qualify for a degree accredited by the Ascended Masters!
ipso flipso conundrum
Posted by: ursa major | June 16, 2009 11:23 AM
Calm down everybody and stop making fun of the University Of Metaphysical Sciences. You just can not "get it" when one suffers from the heartbreak of Mystical Retardation.
Now, as an aid to the gentle readers here, I am humbled to offer a Metaphysical Doctorate in Metaphysical Science from Ursa's Metaphysical University of Metaphysics. My school does not Suffer from the Burden or a mere physical campus - we offer a metaphysical campus and provide you with metaphysical texts, materials and friends! Just send the money and the energy vibrations from the check will reveal if you already qualify for a degree accredited by the Ascended Masters!
ipso flipso conundrum
Posted by: ursa major | June 16, 2009 11:28 AM
Ooops!
Sorry for the double post - I only got the error message once, I swear! Verily I swore!
Posted by: Mike Caton | June 16, 2009 1:24 PM
On the other hand PZ, it often erodes the strength and political power of the dominant religion when there are others in their midst that the majority thinks are ridiculous, whether they're self-consciously farcical (like the FSM) or not (like this one). Easier to show the meaninglessness of the whole affair when these flower-petal-flingers have the same authority to conduct ceremonies as Protestant ministers. That's why I got my Universal Life Church ordination. (Free to get ordained, $25 for the nice certificate.)
Hey Owlmirror, I prefer the Transformers the Movie chant: Bah-weep-grana-weep-ninibong.
Posted by: Mike Caton | June 16, 2009 1:29 PM
On the other hand PZ, it often erodes the strength and political power of the dominant religion when there are others in their midst that the majority thinks are ridiculous, whether they're self-consciously farcical (like the FSM) or not (like this one). Easier to show the meaninglessness of the whole affair when these flower-petal-flingers have the same authority to conduct ceremonies as Protestant ministers. That's why I got my Universal Life Church ordination. (Free to get ordained, $25 for the nice certificate.)
Hey Owlmirror, I prefer the Transformers the Movie chant: Bah-weep-grana-weep-ninibong.
Posted by: Walton | June 16, 2009 1:59 PM
Depends on the jurisdiction. In the US, it varies from state to state.
Here in Britain no organisation can call itself a "university" without a royal charter from the Privy Council, as universities come under the traditional prerogative of the Crown. However, the term "college" is not protected, so anyone who wishes to do so can rent a room above a pub and call it a "college". But only recognised universities are entitled to award degrees.
In my personal view, any organisation should be able to call itself a university without government approval. Voluntary accreditation mechanisms allow employers and other institutions to tell the difference between a real degree and one from a diploma mill; if employers don't bother to check, it is, quite frankly, their problem. I don't see that there's any compelling reason for government to interfere with the higher education market.
Posted by: Bernard Bumner
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June 16, 2009 2:11 PM
Nice. So you'd really like to increase the burden on small businesses to have to try to check the bona fides of every applicant claiming to be university-educated? (Keeping in mind that thousands of diploma-mills will inevitably spring up in the wake of your deregulation.)
Whilst we're at it, we should probably remove protection for title like "Doctor" or "Barrister". If people are just too damn lazy to check the credentials of the person about to slit them from chin to arsehole, or the guy prosecuting that bogus surgeon doing jaw-butt-ectomies, then tough.
Posted by: Isaac Alec Mills
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June 17, 2009 2:37 AM
Yes, I thought it was ridiculous. However they actually have them listed here in Tempe, AZ. I actually have one with me. I would love to become certified and learn how to make myself magnetic. It would make finding my keys so much easier in the morning.
How wonderful, unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be proven yet.
Posted by: Steve Glanz | June 18, 2009 3:08 PM
It saddens me that there is not one positive comment about this University. There is an assumption that the topics taught at the university are all pseudoscience. That assumption is derived from ignorance. I don't claim to know to what degree this particular University addresses the research, but FYI, there is a burgeoning science behind all of the topics taught at the University. Have the blogger or posters actually investigated this program, or the topics that they teach? Informed skepticism is great, but uninformed skepticism lacks credibility.
Posted by: David Morning | June 19, 2009 4:38 PM
Took a look at those two certification sites and found something interesting. They actually are the same site
AADP - The American Association of Drugless Practitioners
AAMA - The American Alternative Medical Association
Both sites link to the American Association of Drugless Practitioners in their source code and use the same frame format linking (both link index2.htm in their iframe).
Additionally, if you look at the naming for the images, both title images are named exactly the same. This suggests someone using the same html files and just dumping new images in it (although they do seem to have made a couple of alterations to the navigation section)
Another interesting little tidbit is that the photo of the certificate linked on the home page of AAMA is a blatantly photoshopped image, but the original image from aadp is still present on the server
http://www.joinaama.com/images/aama_degree.jpg
http://www.joinaama.com/images/degree5.jpg
http://www.aadp.net/images/degree5.jpg
Last but not least, both are hosted on the same server with the same IP address
http://www.who.is/nameserver/ns1.keycity.net/
Oh wait, tell a lie. There is one last bit of info that can be gleaned from this. The address of the registrant of both is identical, other than the name of the company
American Association of Drugless Practitioners
708 Madelaine Drive
Gilmer, TX 75644-3140
US
verified at
http://www.who.is/whois/aadp.net/
http://www.who.is/whois/joinaama.com/
Sadly, it isn't as neat as I might have liked, as the "college" site does seem to be entirely separated from the rest of it. IP, host and location are all different. so either they know the people running this double organisation or have been ripped off by them. I'll hopefully find out once they email me back about it.
(note: wasn't sure about posting the address, but it is public information hosted on their whois. Feel free to edit out if you want to)
Posted by: russell | July 3, 2009 4:04 PM
Blogs are the great equalizer allowing the truly ignorant to interact with the truly intelligent! Why do people care what university one attends or what subject matter one studies? I found more interesting courses on this web site than I have found on traditional college web sites. I would much rather take a class that teaches me how to deal with stress than I one that teaches me about the bedazzlement of analytical geometry.
Posted by: russell | July 3, 2009 4:06 PM
Blogs are the great equalizer allowing the truly ignorant to interact with the truly intelligent! Why do people care what university one attends or what subject matter one studies? I found more interesting courses on this web site than I have found on traditional college web sites. I would much rather take a class that teaches me how to deal with stress than I one that teaches me about the bedazzlement of analytical geometry.
Posted by: Emma | November 8, 2009 10:10 PM
I agree with Steve Glanz, june 18 09. Have any of those bagging bloggers actually studied the course outline and course content of the actual course?
We are in a stressful world these days and those that say that positive thinking can't help illness and disease is totally loopy, because allopathic medical practitioners who have studied for years haven't got the answers either. They are responsible for the number 1 cause of death. (doctor's errors, incorrect prescriptions etc it's called iatrogenic disease.) So positive thought isn't the only thing for illness relief but it certainly does play a big part in it. For example cancer patients have long term issues like problems with resentment, grief, etc that has literally contributed to making them ill. Either they choose to grow spiritually and release these emotional blocks or they can choose not to release and suffer the possibly dire consequences. Another fact those who learn to embrace spiritually after being diagnosed with illness like cancer, MS etc are the ones who have the highest survival rates.
Back to the marriage celebrant qualification, at the end of the day it only matters that the couple to be wed is happy with the ceremony and that the celebrant gives them a legal marriage in the eyes of the country. If everyone's happy then what's the prob. Or are you just jealous that your study led you to a boring 9 to 5 job where these graduates get to do nice wedding ceremonies and help people through their life challenges....