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Friday Cephalopod: Where are the tattoos?

Category: Cephalopods • Organisms
Posted on: August 14, 2009 11:03 AM, by PZ Myers

Octopus maorum

Figure from Cephalopods: A World Guide ^{(amzn/b&n/abe/pwll)}, by Mark Norman.

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Posted by: Sabazinus | August 14, 2009 11:17 AM

What a fine looking octopus.

Hail Cthulhu!

Posted by: E.V. | August 14, 2009 11:22 AM

Tattoos? He don' need no stinkin' tattoos.

Posted by: daveau | August 14, 2009 11:23 AM

Yay!Friday!

Posted by: Burning Umbrella | August 14, 2009 11:24 AM

Underwater border guards must have their appendages full with cephalopod passport pictures.

"Yes officer, the picture was taken yesterday. What, it doesn't look like me? Wait a second, now there, better?"

Posted by: Happy Tentacles | August 14, 2009 11:47 AM

Oh, he looks so masterful!

Posted by: Waiden | August 14, 2009 11:48 AM

TH XSTNC F GD CN B PRVD N FV WYS.

Th frst nd mr mnfst wy s th rgmnt frm mtn. t s crtn, nd vdnt t r snss, tht n th wrld sm thngs r n mtn. Nw whtvr s n mtn s pt n mtn by nthr, fr nthng cn b n mtn xcpt t s n ptntlty t tht twrds whch t s n mtn; whrs thng mvs nsmch s t s n ct. Fr mtn s nthng ls thn th rdctn f smthng frm ptntlty t ctlty. Bt nthng cn b rdcd frm ptntlty t ctlty, xcpt by smthng n stt f ctlty. Ths tht whch s ctlly ht, s fr, mks wd, whch s ptntlly ht, t b ctlly ht, nd thrby mvs nd chngs t. Nw t s nt pssbl tht th sm thng shld b t nc n ctlty nd ptntlty n th sm rspct, bt nly n dffrnt rspcts. Fr wht s ctlly ht cnnt smltnsly b ptntlly ht; bt t s smltnsly ptntlly cld. t s thrfr mpssbl tht n th sm rspct nd n th sm wy thng shld b bth mvr nd mvd, .. tht t shld mv tslf. Thrfr, whtvr s n mtn mst b pt n mtn by nthr. f tht by whch t s pt n mtn b tslf pt n mtn, thn ths ls mst nds b pt n mtn by nthr, nd tht by nthr gn. Bt ths cnnt g n t nfnty, bcs thn thr wld b n frst mvr, nd, cnsqntly, n thr mvr; sng tht sbsqnt mvrs mv nly nsmch s thy r pt n mtn by th frst mvr; s th stff mvs nly bcs t s pt n mtn by th hnd. Thrfr t s ncssry t rrv t frst mvr, pt n mtn by n thr; nd ths vryn ndrstnds t b Gd.

Th scnd wy s frm th ntr f th ffcnt cs. n th wrld f sns w fnd thr s n rdr f ffcnt css. Thr s n cs knwn (nthr s t, ndd, pssbl) n whch thng s fnd t b th ffcnt cs f tslf; fr s t wld b prr t tslf, whch s mpssbl. Nw n ffcnt css t s nt pssbl t g n t nfnty, bcs n ll ffcnt css fllwng n rdr, th frst s th cs f th ntrmdt cs, nd th ntrmdt s th cs f th ltmt cs, whthr th ntrmdt cs b svrl, r nly n. Nw t tk wy th cs s t tk wy th ffct. Thrfr, f thr b n frst cs mng ffcnt css, thr wll b n ltmt, nr ny ntrmdt cs. Bt f n ffcnt css t s pssbl t g n t nfnty, thr wll b n frst ffcnt cs, nthr wll thr b n ltmt ffct, nr ny ntrmdt ffcnt css; ll f whch s plnly fls. Thrfr t s ncssry t dmt frst ffcnt cs, t whch vryn gvs th nm f Gd.

Th thrd wy s tkn frm pssblty nd ncssty, nd rns ths. W fnd n ntr thngs tht r pssbl t b nd nt t b, snc thy r fnd t b gnrtd, nd t crrpt, nd cnsqntly, thy r pssbl t b nd nt t b. Bt t s mpssbl fr ths lwys t xst, fr tht whch s pssbl nt t b t sm tm s nt. Thrfr, f vrythng s pssbl nt t b, thn t n tm thr cld hv bn nthng n xstnc. Nw f ths wr tr, vn nw thr wld b nthng n xstnc, bcs tht whch ds nt xst nly bgns t xst by smthng lrdy xstng. Thrfr, f t n tm nthng ws n xstnc, t wld hv bn mpssbl fr nythng t hv bgn t xst; nd ths vn nw nthng wld b n xstnc — whch s bsrd. Thrfr, nt ll bngs r mrly pssbl, bt thr mst xst smthng th xstnc f whch s ncssry. Bt vry ncssry thng thr hs ts ncssty csd by nthr, r nt. Nw t s mpssbl t g n t nfnty n ncssry thngs whch hv thr ncssty csd by nthr, s hs bn lrdy prvd n rgrd t ffcnt css. Thrfr w cnnt bt pstlt th xstnc f sm bng hvng f tslf ts wn ncssty, nd nt rcvng t frm nthr, bt rthr csng n thrs thr ncssty. Ths ll mn spk f s Gd.

Th frth wy s tkn frm th grdtn t b fnd n thngs. mng bngs thr r sm mr nd sm lss gd, tr, nbl nd th lk. Bt "mr" nd "lss" r prdctd f dffrnt thngs, ccrdng s thy rsmbl n thr dffrnt wys smthng whch s th mxmm, s thng s sd t b httr ccrdng s t mr nrly rsmbls tht whch s httst; s tht thr s smthng whch s trst, smthng bst, smthng nblst nd, cnsqntly, smthng whch s ttrmst bng; fr ths thngs tht r grtst n trth r grtst n bng, s t s wrttn n Mtph. . Nw th mxmm n ny gns s th cs f ll n tht gns; s fr, whch s th mxmm ht, s th cs f ll ht thngs. Thrfr thr mst ls b smthng whch s t ll bngs th cs f thr bng, gdnss, nd vry thr prfctn; nd ths w cll Gd.

Th ffth wy s tkn frm th gvrnnc f th wrld. W s tht thngs whch lck ntllgnc, sch s ntrl bds, ct fr n nd, nd ths s vdnt frm thr ctng lwys, r nrly lwys, n th sm wy, s s t btn th bst rslt. Hnc t s pln tht nt frttsly, bt dsgndly, d thy chv thr nd. Nw whtvr lcks ntllgnc cnnt mv twrds n nd, nlss t b drctd by sm bng ndwd wth knwldg nd ntllgnc; s th rrw s sht t ts mrk by th rchr. Thrfr sm ntllgnt bng xsts by whm ll ntrl thngs r drctd t thr nd; nd ths bng w cll Gd.

[damned moron. disemvoweling is too good for him. --pzm]

Posted by: Ravelyn | August 14, 2009 11:51 AM

Wayto muss up a ceph thread, Waiden!

Posted by: E.V. | August 14, 2009 11:59 AM

Oh Waiden, *sigh* if any of that were only true and not a ridiculous presuppositional argument full of logical fallacies and absolutely no empirical evidence to any of your claims...

Posted by: Matt Penfold | August 14, 2009 12:01 PM

Fancy being so arrogant as to pass Thomas Aquinas' work of as your own.

And so stupid as to think no one would notice.

#10

Posted by: Greg | August 14, 2009 12:03 PM

Poe @6

An error in grammar in each of the first two sentences? Too obvious. You couldn't be that stupid.

#11

Posted by: AdamK | August 14, 2009 12:03 PM

Garbage Troll smeared stinky nonsense all over the thread.

tl;dr

#12

Posted by: thegusdad | August 14, 2009 12:03 PM

So now the Xians are just doing massive cut-and-paste from Aquinas in unrelated threads? That's not persuasive. It's also rude.

#13

Posted by: Matt Penfold | August 14, 2009 12:07 PM

So now the Xians are just doing massive cut-and-paste from Aquinas in unrelated threads? That's not persuasive. It's also rude.

And failing to attribute the content, so add plagiarism to the list.

#14

Posted by: jck | August 14, 2009 12:09 PM

For a minute there, I thought that octopus was on land. I thought Cthulhu was coming back for sure!

#15

Posted by: Matt Penfold | August 14, 2009 12:12 PM

I had a look at the book PZ gets these pics from.

I would love a copy, but even on Amazon it is bloody expensive. Maybe I will have to drop hints around my birthday.

#16

Posted by: Matthew | August 14, 2009 12:13 PM

First - that octopus is magnificent.

Now, for fear of engaging a troll....

Waiden - I'm sure you'll get credit for that post in your class. Good job for doing your homework!
Now, all of your "arguments" can be pretty much refuted with one question..."Who created God?" Because if all of your arguments are true, there must be something/someone greater than God to have caused him, given him motion, etc. And then there must be something greater than that something-greater-than-God to have caused it. And so on for an infinite number of steps, unlike your description states. So none of your arguments work. You can't just say..."there always has to be something greater" but "there has to be a first and greatest thing" and tada...GOD!

Go back to the drawing board and let us know when you have some evidence...or at least logically solid arguments.

#17

Posted by: SEF | August 14, 2009 12:16 PM

Where are the tattoos?

Well there's one over in Edinburgh ... ;-)

... and some of the symbiotes have enough limbs between them to rival a cephalopod.

#18

Posted by: Silič O'Nopolitanopoulos, Färschdbischuf Beesknees aus Ulm und Klein Elguth, Elector Pharynguline. | August 14, 2009 12:19 PM

Well, I'm sure that was more than the required 2000 characters (or was it words?).

A+ to the young man.

There's a nice drawing of an octopus in my book on project management - almost made it worth reading ...

#19

Posted by: Shaggy Maniac | August 14, 2009 1:19 PM

Mmmm...it looks tasty!

#20

Posted by: abys | August 14, 2009 1:26 PM

Hey PZ, what you should do is go back on that site and see if there's any mentioned 'deadlines' or whatnot for that "Post 5 troll posts on scientific blogs" class site. Wait for about when it's about... oh, 2 days after the deadline for submitting all the URLs for submitted comments.

Then, in one fell swoop, delete all the troll posts like Waiden's. Whoops, there goes 20% of the poor saps' grades! The mean scientist daweeted my homework, professor!

#21

Posted by: Bob Calder | August 14, 2009 1:34 PM

Waiden - the ONLY person who reads that crap is your loony prof. It's Friday dude. Time for thoughts of nubile females of your preferred denomination and beverages of the allowable vintage.

#22

Posted by: Rachel D. | August 14, 2009 1:46 PM

I say we feed Waiden to the Cephalopod.

#23

Posted by: amphiox | August 14, 2009 2:03 PM

Hi Waiden,

Whatever possessed you to come to this thread with a rehashed (and poorly presented) version of Aquinas? If it was someone else who convinced you to do it, you need to find that person because you owe him a big solid punch to the face. As if the people here have not already heard and refuted ALL these arguments, presented more coherently and convincingly than you have, umpteenth times. You're going to get eaten alive here. You really should get out while you still have some shred of dignity left intact.

Your first way, even if true, argues for a god no more complex or capable than a billiard ball.

Your second way is an unproven assumption. In fact the argument refutes itself. If there is a FIRST cause, that cause MUST have no prior cause. Thus it IS, in fact possible for a cause to be uncaused, whereupon it is certainly possible for the universe to have caused itself, with no need for a god. IF there is NO first cause, because all causes must be caused, then the only way for the universe to exist, lacking first cause, is for it to have always existed, eternally, in which case there is no need for a god either.

Your third way is just a restatement of your second way, and falls the same way.

Your fourth way is solid logical proof that MAN exists, I'll grant you that. All gradations and classifications are subjective things that humans have invented for convenience purposes.

Your fifth way is simply wrong. Not all things act for an end. At any rate "end" is a human concept, invented by humans.

#24

Posted by: Nat | August 14, 2009 2:09 PM

Poor cephalopod, probably would dislike the "treat". Dip him in chocolate and throw him to the lesbians, they wouldn't enjoy him either, but I'm pretty sure if he's such a God lover, he'll probably hate it more than the cephalopod.

#25

Posted by: St.B | August 14, 2009 2:21 PM

All I wanted to do was see the scary pic of the cephalopod, but NOOO. Here’s to hoping this was going to be a singular day free of idiocy, no such luck. Waiden caused me to wade through his craptacular diatribe. Congrats Waiden, ya pissed on my parade. (Next time use something a little more obscure.)

Ol’ H.P. knew what scares me, rockin’ the Cthulhu!

#26

Posted by: Peter Ashby | August 14, 2009 2:28 PM

Octopus are not tattooed because having no chin they cannot have moko, so no start can be made. They are also naturally resistant to ink.

I'll get my coat.

#27

Posted by: Michael Dickens | August 14, 2009 2:30 PM

Is that gangsta or what?

#6: Congratulations. You're that much closer to your Master's.

#28

Posted by: Ranson | August 14, 2009 2:36 PM

Am I the only one that thinks the tattoo thing is a pun on Maori/maorum?

#29

Posted by: Ranson | August 14, 2009 2:39 PM

Never mind, I see Peter Ashby, at least, got it too.

#30

Posted by: Lily | August 14, 2009 3:18 PM

Waiden, don't post that nonsense on the sacred Friday Cephalopod thread. I saw the image of Lord Cthulhu in a splatter of bird poop this morning, and I know in the deepest canyons of my soul that this is a sign that the long awaited Squid Rapture is imminent. Lord Cthulhu will surely smite you for your misdeads when she comes to wisk us believers away in her holy tentacles to live in paradise at the bottom of the sea.

#31

Posted by: Qwerty | August 14, 2009 3:18 PM

It looks like Waiden took a crap and ran. I guess he knows it would be futile to remain and try some semblence of an argument.

Anyhow, very pretty picture of a handsome dude. (Handsome to females of his ilk.)

(Now, someone will tell me this is a female. Oh, well.)

#32

Posted by: Rob W | August 14, 2009 3:52 PM

Waiden: FAITH IS THE ANTITHESIS OF PROOF.

'Nuff said.

#33

Posted by: Tim Janger | August 14, 2009 3:57 PM

Fire is the maximum heat? I guess that makes ice the maximum cold and Religion the maximum stupid... I think I get it now :)

#34

Posted by: Eidolon | August 14, 2009 4:04 PM

No tats but these are some bad ass octos. Max size between 9 and 12 kg; prey on other octos and even octo eggs (baby eaters, just like all atheists).

BTW, good 'un Burning @4

#35

Posted by: amphiox | August 14, 2009 4:18 PM

It's a loose definition of fire that includes fusion and matter-antimatter reactions.

#36

Posted by: CRShelton | August 14, 2009 4:24 PM

Have you folks seen this: http://www.stateofprotest.com/morality/dna-sculpture-vile-offensive/

It's a sculpture of a DNA strand and it is being protested because children may see it start asking Questions.

"My 7 year old should not be talking about this. Now I have to explain genetics to her and why it isn't in the bible"

#37

Posted by: CRShelton | August 14, 2009 4:27 PM

Okay, I am the gullible one this time. Upon further inspection I think this is a satire.

In any case it must say something about the fundies that I wouldn't put it past them, and hopefully says something about my close-minded atheist viewpoint that I'm willing to own my mistakes in the face of clear evidence.

#38

Posted by: Number8Dave | August 14, 2009 4:37 PM

Ranson (#28):
It's not exactly a pun - 'maorum' is indeed a latinised version of 'Maori' (I think if I remember my schoolboy Latin it would be genitive plural, 'of the Maori'?) - this is the common New Zealand octopus. A very handsome animal, and quite common.

#39

Posted by: 'Tis Himself, Quel Dommage | August 14, 2009 6:01 PM

That's a beautiful octopod.

BTW, Waiden, may you be eaten last.

#40

Posted by: Ron | August 14, 2009 6:02 PM

Some additional cephalopod pretties for true believers.

http://www.ronshimek.com/blog/

Enjoy!!

#41

Posted by: deadman_932 | August 14, 2009 6:50 PM

Number8Dave (comment#38):

Yup, the octopus (Te Wheke) is a powerful symbol in Maoridom and is seen as a representation of Maori health and happiness in the whānau (family), the hapū (sub-tribe) and/or the iwi (tribe or people), with each tentacle having symbolic meaning attached to it.

Here's an illustration: http://www.ohaeawai.school.nz/graphics/Librarytewheke.jpg

#42

Posted by: greg | August 14, 2009 7:10 PM

Hahahaha, speaking in tongues for the win1!!11elventyone!!!111!!one1!.

#43

Posted by: H.H. | August 14, 2009 10:53 PM

We haven't had an open thread in awhile, so I'm going to plunk this OT notice here. Please excuse the interruption, but the NY Daily News blatantly pandered to the faithful by offering up a non-event as a news story: Man doesn't regain sight, claims miracle! Of course, the headline would lead any reasonable person to actually assume the reverse:

http://www.skepticfriends.org/forum/topic.asp?TOPIC_ID=11920

#44

Posted by: Heleva Pryce | August 14, 2009 10:58 PM

Not only do I LOVE these lovely creatures, and respectfully since I dive, I am amazed at the sentience.
Cthulhu Rocks BTW. Got a stuffed Cthulhu doll for my grandson.

#45

Posted by: GrifySorSlorN | August 15, 2009 2:03 AM

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#46

Posted by: JohnnieCanuck | August 15, 2009 2:42 AM

Google translation informs me that Grify etc. is promoting a Russian Porn site.

Probably a risky click.

#47

Posted by: DLC | August 15, 2009 12:55 PM

Special for Waiden: yr gd cnnt b prvn t xst.
(yes, I know PZ Disemvoweled him, but my counter-argument makes much more sense than his TLDR C&P does even with all it's vowels. )

As for the cephalopod: cool looking. but beware, it's got an eye on you . .. or the camera, anyway.

#48

Posted by: Pexspeepego | August 15, 2009 3:09 PM

Доброго времения суток дорогие друзья!

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#49

Posted by: illerepycle | August 15, 2009 10:01 PM

Hi folks!

I just want to say hello to you all,
and see you in next posts!

cheers
illerepycle

#50

Posted by: Quark | August 16, 2009 12:45 AM

"As for the cephalopod: cool looking. but beware, it's got an eye on you . .. or the camera, anyway."

Indeed, I've previously seen that look on Clint Eastwood's face ... it more or less says "screw with me at your own peril, champ."

#51

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