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You have to read between the lines to get it, but short answer: god is Australian!
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I would ask whose historicity was questioned in antiquity, when both pagan historians and Christian Fathers accepted pagan saviour gods as historical personages? (Herodotus says Attis was the son of a king of Lydia and that Horus, son of Isis and Osiris, was a ruler of Egypt. Clement of Alexandria regarded pagan saviour gods as 'mere men' and Firmicus Maternus called Osiris and Typhon 'without doubt' kings of Egypt). Can one expect much in the way of critical scepticism when, even in modern times, Wilhelm Till long passed as a real person?
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More articles by PZ Myers can be found on Freethoughtblogs at the new Pharyngula!
Ever wonder why god did such a lousy job designing us?
Category: Humor
Posted on: September 7, 2009 11:35 AM, by PZ Myers
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Comments
Posted by: Valdyr | September 7, 2009 11:59 AM
"Oh, I love being reminded that I exist!"
Posted by: The Science Pundit
|
September 7, 2009 12:00 PM
gØd seems to be a lousy poker player. How can I set up a game with him?
Posted by: monkeyman8 | September 7, 2009 12:09 PM
The Christians were right, intelligent design makes perfect sense, god got owned by Satan. all hail Satan for the dangly thing between my legs :P
Posted by: Islander | September 7, 2009 12:11 PM
I liked this one better:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zOfjkl-3SNE
Posted by: shonny | September 7, 2009 12:14 PM
OT:
Who is Glenn Beck, and when he calls his book 'Arguing with Idiots' is that because he argues with his image in the mirror?
Just that the title came up on my Amazon account, and when I saw that he is on FuckedNews I got suspicious.
Posted by: Geoff | September 7, 2009 12:17 PM
Speaking of humor... has anyone heard of Father Kelly on Twitter?
http://twitter.com/FatherKelly
Some samples:
I have to perform a God damn exorcism today. I'm gonna throw in the line "ooga booga" and see if anyone notices.
Don't want me to recoil in horror at the baptism? Warn me that the baby looks like a Quasimodo BEFORE the blanket's pulled back!
It's the best reason I can think of to actually use twitter.
Posted by: Iris | September 7, 2009 12:19 PM
The Christian god is such a pathological narcissist, I cannot for the life of me figure out why anyone who thinks about it for a minute believes that a god created man in his image - and not the other way around.
Unless, of course, they've been somehow indoctrinated not to think about it at all, under penalty of eternal torture. Or not to think at all. Or that knowledge is itself evil...Oh, wait.
Never mind.
Posted by: Silič O'Nopolitanopoulos, Färschdbischuf Beesknees aus Ulm und Klein Elguth, Elector Pharynguline.
|
September 7, 2009 12:27 PM
...
The ...
errrr ...
'ecstatic' noises God makes are ... very disugusting.
Posted by: Iris | September 7, 2009 12:35 PM
I need to know which one of those two asshats lost the bet on human spine design. As I lay nearly immobilized on my floor with excruciating back pain, I am just wondering which is the appropriate fictional character to curse.
I'm guessing the correct answer is "Eve." Am I right? :p
Posted by: John McGrath | September 7, 2009 12:35 PM
Perhaps the right wing Intelligent Design people are right. Arguing God's purpose from nature would make God a predator and the basis for morality to be preying on others. Not a bad moral basis for our runaway, rigged market capitalism. At least this view of intelligent deign accurately describes the world.
Posted by: Richard Harris | September 7, 2009 12:54 PM
As an engineer myself, i reckon that Yahweh fella, if he's designed us, oughta be sued for negligence. If i were that incompetent, I'd get my ass sued off.
Posted by: Irene Delse | September 7, 2009 12:56 PM
Ha. I guess that's why gambling is a sin too!
Posted by: Gilipollas Caraculo | September 7, 2009 12:58 PM
I have to admit, that is the first intelligence dialog I've encountered on intelligent design.
Posted by: Chris P | September 7, 2009 1:09 PM
Richard Harris
Unfortunately I don't think you have anything to fear about getting sued. I follow what happens to PE's (Professional Engineers) when they screw up.
A PE left an improperly stayed slender beam over the freeway in Colorado. A while later when they had reopened the freeway it settled a tiny bit and felt off killing an entire family. AFAIK nobody has even been censured or fired over it.
Posted by: Paul Claessen | September 7, 2009 1:14 PM
Speaking of Australians ... (and god)
Here's Australia's answer to Edward Current:
http://www.youtube.com/user/1GOD1JESUS#play/uploads/24/sA_M3H5Yi1I
Posted by: Savior Breath | September 7, 2009 1:33 PM
OT
OT
OT
My son's public high school homework is on Hebrews. The final question on his worksheet is "Do you have any personal religious beliefs that can be traced to the Hebrews."
Anyone have any snappy answers?
Posted by: David Marjanović, OM | September 7, 2009 1:40 PM
This is a nomination for the Nobel Prize in Physiology Or Medicine.
Comment 12 might deserve the Nobel Peace Prize.
…
…though… I must say, I'm quite comfortable with my foreskin. Hypersensitive as I am, wearing clothes would probably outright hurt if it weren't there. But why do they call it a "flap"?
Posted by: Nick | September 7, 2009 1:41 PM
Wait, isn't he supposed to be omniscient?
Posted by: ChrisZ | September 7, 2009 1:43 PM
I always like this one personally
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IVbnciQYMiM&feature=related
Posted by: Chemgirl
|
September 7, 2009 1:54 PM
@#16 Savior Breath
Sat here thinking about it for a few minutes, and I've got nothing better than "I also believe that foreskins look silly and should be cut off", which seems a bit
unfunnyjuvenile and school-inappropriate...I'm disappointed in myself.I'm looking forward to others' answers though
Posted by: eddie | September 7, 2009 2:01 PM
Chris P @14 has it. If you're gonna make a mess of something, do it properly: Survivors sue.
I have to say that's the only reasonable argument for design I have heard.
Posted by: eddie | September 7, 2009 2:06 PM
Do other people's foreskins look silly? Mine looks OK. I'll need to collect more data.
Hey, chemgirl, can I crib Ur homework?
Posted by: eddie | September 7, 2009 2:11 PM
*realises chemgirl was being humorous in response to #16*
*slinks off to hide*
Posted by: Richard Harris | September 7, 2009 2:17 PM
Chris P #14 Unfortunately I don't think you have anything to fear about getting sued.
From the case that you quote, it's not at all clear to me that an engineer was responsible.
As for engineers in general, for those of us in private practice, we would be foolish not to carry liability insurance. Getting sued is not something that gets discussed much, here in the UK, so i don't know the statistics.
In Ontario, there's a regular crop of PEngs getting disciplined each month, as I read in the PEO journal. I guess some of these are then also sued by their clients. Mostly, they're structural engineers, (like me).
But none of them cock things up like that Yahweh fecker.
Posted by: David Wiener | September 7, 2009 2:17 PM
Savior@16
My atheism can be directly traced back to the Hebrews (being one of them myself).
Posted by: dusty | September 7, 2009 2:26 PM
For S B at #16
From an ancient Hebrew text :
" Believe nothing, no matter where you read it, or who said, no matter if I have said it, unless it agrees with your own reason and your own common sense."
Oh shit .....never mind ....that was Gotama Buddha.
Posted by: The Arbourist | September 7, 2009 2:33 PM
Nonstampcollector, the author of the video is on hiatus. I hope he gets back into the game soon, his work is wonderful.
Posted by: MK | September 7, 2009 3:09 PM
Brilliant!!
Posted by: Mike Wagner | September 7, 2009 3:51 PM
@TheArbourist
It doesn't seem like he's on hiatus any longer, as the post date on that was yesterday.
Yay!
Posted by: Glen Davidson | September 7, 2009 4:30 PM
Why'd he design Australian animals even worse than the others, though? Course, "Australian" might explain even that (no, don't ask how).
Still seems a little fishy, but then the beauty of goddidit is that you're not supposed to ask questions about it.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p
Posted by: Aquaria | September 7, 2009 4:33 PM
Savior Breath:
The only thing I could come up with for what I learned from the Hebrews was never to ask for directions when you're lost, just keep going. You'll get wherever you're going
Eventually..
Posted by: Pentimento | September 7, 2009 4:47 PM
Homework snappy comebacks:
Unfortunately, if the teacher has no critical thinking skills or ironic sense, these could make your child seem less intelligent to him or her, but, here goes....
A Christian should have only one wife. This is called monotony.
St. Paul preached Holy Acrimony, which is another word for marriage.
The Epistles were the wives of the Apostles.
Jesus was born because Mary had an immaculate contraption.
Lot's wife was a pillar of salt by day, but a ball of fire by night.
And the number one.....
What I received from Hebrews was best expressed by Ian Anderson:
"If Jesus saves, then he'd better save himself, from the gory glory-seekers, who would use his name in death."
Posted by: AnneH | September 7, 2009 5:05 PM
@Savior Breath,
Not a 'personal religious' belief, but a moral belief - Christianity, Judaism, and Islam all consider the biblical Abraham as a spiritual ancestor. Given that they are all 'children of Father Abraham', the constant strife between them is wrong.
Posted by: AnneH | September 7, 2009 5:07 PM
@Savior Breath,
Not a 'personal religious' belief, but a moral belief - Christianity, Judaism, and Islam all consider the biblical Abraham as a spiritual ancestor. Given that they are all 'children of Father Abraham', the constant strife between them is wrong. They all claim to believe in Abraham's God, yet they use that belief as an excuse to kill each other.
Posted by: AnneH | September 7, 2009 5:08 PM
feh, my edit double posted. Please ignore #33.
Posted by: marc buhler | September 7, 2009 5:29 PM
Calling Ed Brayton!!
Ed, are you here yet??
(heads over to Culture Wars to see if Ed is busy.....)
Ed is soooo going to laugh at this!
Posted by: M31 | September 7, 2009 6:17 PM
Remember the old joke about the engineers looking over god's design for the human reproductive system?
"Hey, hold on a minute here, who put the waste management system right in the middle of the recreation area?"
Posted by: Twisted_Colour | September 7, 2009 6:33 PM
god is Australian!
Sorry, that doesn't hold. If god was an Aussie it would be a sin for Yanks to wear body armour when they play the game they call football.... and continuous play for longer than 15 seconds.
Posted by: Gregory Greenwood | September 7, 2009 7:13 PM
God is an Austalian?
Heretics!
God is clearly an Englishman. You can tell he is one of us Brits, or rather he was one of us Brits back in the glory days of Empire. Just look at our long history of mindless religious violence, nicking off with other peoples mineral wealth/land/wives/children/entire communities, our patholigical need to receive the adulation of other 'lesser' races, our complete lack of respect for the cultures of others and a near psychotic belief that we should show them how they should live, a rabid desire to expand our territory and influence as far as possible, our ludicrously repressed attitude towars sexuality . . . what could possibly be more godly than that?
Of course, The UK of the modern day has far too many milksop concerns with 'tolerence', 'pluralism' and 'equality' to be properly godly.
I wonder if god has changed his stripes to be a Bible-Belt American these days?
Posted by: CatBallou
|
September 7, 2009 7:33 PM
I was with them up until the "men have a greater sex drive" nonsense.
Posted by: Antigone | September 7, 2009 9:26 PM
I got to go with CatBallou with this one- men most DEFINITELY do NOT have higher sex drives then women. That's a really stupid cultural myth.
Posted by: Camels With Hammers | September 7, 2009 9:54 PM
I watched a whole bunch of his videos last night and this morning and many are extremely sharp and really drive home some of the nuances of the irrationality of the Bible and contemporary Christianity. His bit where the modern Christian shows up to where Jesus is speaking to correct him and his bit where three people each testify to what they know about Jesus from knowing him personally are both scathingly good. And the best was "What Would Jesus NOT Do" which really obliterates the idea that what Jesus DID do was remotely adequate to be considered a divine contribution to humanity.
Posted by: Larry | September 8, 2009 12:22 AM
At my age, my foreslin serves as a locator for my penis
when I have to go; and my 50M sperm go nowhere since my vasectomy some 40 years ago. Age and modifications do tend to change any original intelligent ( or not ) design.
Posted by: Rhysz | September 8, 2009 3:19 AM
Can I post again?
Posted by: Rhysz | September 8, 2009 3:25 AM
Dear PZ,
We're doing a charity show sept. 12th the maker of this video will be attending. We would be greatly honoured if you'd consider attending the show. All proceeds from the show will be going to Doctors Without Borders. I hope to see you there.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1A093z2cSHY
Thank you for your time!
Regards,
Rhysz
Posted by: RHysz | September 8, 2009 3:29 AM
P.S.
Here's our newest promo video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7R7NRXHrPk&feature=channel_page
Posted by: Gregory Greenwood | September 8, 2009 11:29 AM
CatBallou @ 40 and Antigone @ 41;
"men most DEFINITELY do NOT have higher sex drives then women. That's a really stupid cultural myth"
Its . . . just . . . a . . . myth?
Halleula!
Now I feel so much better.
Posted by: jb | September 8, 2009 1:13 PM
@ #16
Coke is better than Pepsi.
Posted by: truth machine, OM | September 8, 2009 9:22 PM
I got to go with CatBallou with this one- men most DEFINITELY do NOT have higher sex drives then women. That's a really stupid cultural myth.
So stupid that you don't even need to present an argument, eh?
Posted by: Mike John | December 17, 2009 5:27 AM
Oh gsh lvly nc y svd m lt f tm nd frstrtn.thnks