…and this is a 
As you all know, it was predicted that the world would end on 21 October. I understand many of you are puzzled to note that you are still here. The purpose of this post is to inform any of you who have been engaged in wild, drunken orgies all night and are now blearily and confusedly turning on your computers and turning immediately to Pharyngula (as you all do, I know) that unfortunately, you are very late to work. Shower quickly, get to your car, and get coffee at the drive-through on your way — with any luck, though, your boss is in the same state and will forgive you.
However, I have to inform you that the world did end yesterday, exactly as predicted. Note please, that today is Thursday. The world is created anew every Thursday, with all the evidence of great age, including memories of last week, implanted freshly in the universe. So you actually did a) die horribly in chaos and flames or b) loft nakedly and rapturously in a beam of light to heaven last night, but you are now living in a background of false memories that do not include such trauma, because God is good…at dicking around with your head.
As a side bonus, the Deep Rift between the LastThursdayists and LastTuesdayists has now been healed with the positive affirmation of the truth of the former's position. Any LastTuesdayists who persist in their error can now be dealt with in an entirely justifiable and dire way.
Comments
Posted by: Islander | October 22, 2009 12:20 PM
Well I'm glad these memories of being raised by fundamenalists in the deep ass-crack of Texas are all fake.
Posted by: Draken
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October 22, 2009 12:21 PM
I, for one, know that the Universe was created just a few years ago with me as its centre and that it will come to a horrible end unless you supply me with copious amounts of free beer.
Posted by: arrakis
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October 22, 2009 12:21 PM
This totally explains why everything on the radio sounds like it did last Thursday, only more annoying...
Posted by: PZ Myers
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October 22, 2009 12:23 PM
You are confusing LastThursdayism with Groundhog Day, heretic!
Posted by: kalibhakta
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October 22, 2009 12:23 PM
thus proving my students' assertions that I am so absent-minded that the world could end and I wouldn't know it.
Posted by: Janine, Vile Bitch, OM | October 22, 2009 12:24 PM
We were waiting for the end of the world,
Waiting for the end of the world,
Waiting for the end of the world.
Dear Lord I sincerely hope you're coming
'Cause you really started something.
Posted by: cervantes
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October 22, 2009 12:24 PM
It seems they have decided to stop committing to a date -- it now says just "fall 2009." That gives them till Dec. 21, technically.
These calculations are tricky, you have to solve simultaneous differential equations. Sometimes you're off by a few weeks.
Posted by: PaulC | October 22, 2009 12:25 PM
Well that explains the Allen wrench and styrofoam packing material I found under my pillow this morning. These guys really need to learn to clean up after themselves.
Posted by: Corey S
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October 22, 2009 12:25 PM
You know the world will not end when it is already tomorrow on the side of the world.
Posted by: Nancy A. | October 22, 2009 12:26 PM
The International Earth Destruction Advisory Board says the world ended on Sept. 10, 2008. Shoot, I missed it! http://qntm.org/?board
Posted by: Corey S
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October 22, 2009 12:27 PM
I meant "on the other side of the world."
Posted by: Gyeong Hwa Pak | October 22, 2009 12:28 PM
PZ, are you suggesting that I'm enacting a fallatio on God?
lol.
Posted by: Uncle Glenny
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October 22, 2009 12:28 PM
When I got up this morning my housemate was sitting in his bathrobe, doing whatever on my laptop, at the time he should have been at work.
He claimed he was confused about his schedule for the day, but I'll have to question him later. Surely if he thought he were in heaven the macbook would be faster and have more memory.
Posted by: AJ Milne OM
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October 22, 2009 12:28 PM
Mandatory:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_eyFiClAzq8
(/Passed on the 'Armageddon It', after all... It's just too early in the apocalyptic morning after for that kinda thing, really.)
Posted by: Clemens | October 22, 2009 12:32 PM
There are a lot of babies to be born in 9 months time :D
Posted by: Draken
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October 22, 2009 12:32 PM
The problem with prophecies.
Posted by: Moggie
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October 22, 2009 12:32 PM
Radiometric dating clearly points to an Earth older than last Thursday, so LastTuesdayism is the more respectable position. Occam, bitches!
Posted by: June | October 22, 2009 12:35 PM
PZ, you are not fooling us with your lies that the world did not end. We are staying in our survival bunkers with 3 months food. We know full well that the world actually ended, and you just want us to come out so you can steal our food.
Posted by: round guy | October 22, 2009 12:37 PM
Meh. That site needs way more caps. Sure, they've got the colors and the fonts and the sizes, but how you gonna convince folks the world's ending without caps?
Posted by: cag
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October 22, 2009 12:38 PM
The Rapture occurred right on time. The problem was that the Xtians confused Rapture Worthy with Rapture Ready. None of the Xtians made the cut, but there are a couple of atheists missing this morning.
Posted by: Lauren Ipsum | October 22, 2009 12:40 PM
A million New Yorkers were good Last Thursday... were you?
Posted by: Feynmaniac
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October 22, 2009 12:41 PM
Well I guess this person will realize that their views have been falsified and use the experience to become skeptical of religious claims....
...NOT!
Failed Prophecies frequently do not dissuade true believers. They seem to be immune to things like logic or empirical evidence.
Posted by: Jim A. | October 22, 2009 12:45 PM
Blasphemer! The world was created today for the first and only time. The world will be destroyed next Thursday. The world was created with the ILLUSION that it has been in existance for billions of years and the illusion that people had believed that it had been created LAST Thursday. Which is absurd, because it was created TODAY.
Posted by: Silič O'Nopolitanopoulos, Färschdbischuf Beesknees aus Ulm und Klein Elguth, Elector Pharynguline.
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October 22, 2009 12:46 PM
Well, technically this "I" can't be the one who suffered such a horrible end yesterday, since then those memories could hardly be "false".In fact, some poor sod was condemned to eternal suffrage yesterday, and today I was created ex nihilo and given his memories of his life up until he entered the infernal voting booth.
Well, technically, not just "his" memories, but "his" memories from the week before, plus "his" false memories from all the guys the went before and were destroyed on each and every Wednesday before the other since all eternity. In saeculo saeculorum.
Posted by: Matt "Nora" Penfold
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October 22, 2009 12:48 PM
You know what, Pharyngula is the first website I check each morning. Since I check it whilst having my first cup of tea of the day it also explains why I get through keyboards very quickly. Laughing with a mouth full of tea tends not to do much good to a keyboard.
Posted by: Michelle R | October 22, 2009 12:48 PM
Guess what?? I dreamt that the world was ending last night. We were being sucked in a black hole.
Coincidence? I THINK NOT.
Posted by: Desert Son
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October 22, 2009 12:49 PM
Now I'm confused. Are we sure our bodies haven't been overtaken by the time-traveling Great Race of Yith in an effort to escape destruction at the hands of the Flying Polyps and their horrific wind-powered attacks?
Also, why is my mind now trapped in giant conical body with tentacles? Mom? Iä?
No kings,
Robert
Posted by: Michelle R | October 22, 2009 12:51 PM
...by the way, did you folks notice they removed the date from the website and now it's just Fall 2009?
Posted by: Silič O'Nopolitanopoulos, Färschdbischuf Beesknees aus Ulm und Klein Elguth, Elector Pharynguline.
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October 22, 2009 12:51 PM
Why would he think he were in heaven if there was a mac present?Relax. I could have said "when you were present."
Posted by: NoAstronomer | October 22, 2009 12:53 PM
Rumors are circulating that the LastThursdayism ecumenical council is considering ways in which LastTuesdayists who are dissatisfied with their faith could be encouraged to convert.
Possible solutions include partial recognition of a compromise LastWednesdayism position and would enable LastThursdayists to maintain many of their traditions, such as chocolate cup-cakes at Brian's house on Saturday afternoons (about Tea Time).
Posted by: ScottKnick | October 22, 2009 12:53 PM
I followed the links back and found this on the prophetic web site:
"If we subtract 2520 days from September 23, 2015 we come to October 29, 2008. SEE CALCULATION In Revelation 8:1 it talks about a silence in heaven for 30 minutes, and in the scripture above in Daniel 9:27, it could be read: “he shall reaffirm his campaign promises with his many followers for one week”. SEE MORE HERE As you probably remember, Obama’s 30-minute info-commercial occurred on October 29, 2008!"
A silence in heaven? I can hear Yahweh now: "Will you please SHUT UP, all ye cherubim and seraphim? I'm trying to watch television!"
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp | October 22, 2009 12:54 PM
Everyone knows that the MAC community is just like a religion anyway.
Posted by: Flea
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October 22, 2009 12:56 PM
The world ended yesterday and tomorrow... Happy Birthday Universe!
According to Ussher chronology the first day of creation began at nightfall preceding Sunday October 23, 4004 BC!
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ussher_chronology)
Posted by: Corey S
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October 22, 2009 12:57 PM
As a web designer, the site needs to be raptured. Different fonts, sizes and colours are one thing, but putting it all on single page?
Posted by: Porco Dio
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October 22, 2009 1:02 PM
are we really here? or are we just a figment of some deities imagination?
Posted by: Aquaria
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October 22, 2009 1:02 PM
you are very late to work. Shower quickly, get to your car, and get coffee at the drive-through on your way
Sigh...
I'm not late to work. It may not even be a workday for some of us. Not everyone works 9-5, M-F.
Posted by: Brock | October 22, 2009 1:03 PM
Tuesday? Thursday? I know not of these days. There are 5 days in the week, and it ends on Prickle-Prickle, whereupon everything resets with false memories. Get it straight, mmkay?
Posted by: charley | October 22, 2009 1:05 PM
@20 "...but there are a couple of atheists missing this morning."
Um...yea, I hate to tell you guys, but we bitters are up here in heaven, and it's pretty sweet. Internet is fast, commenting works and we're getting ready to marry some sheep for 7 years or something. I never noticed how hot those things are.
Posted by: Ronaldo Camacho | October 22, 2009 1:07 PM
Actually there is an error in this date: it's two years from now.
The rapture will take place on May 21st, and the world will end on October 21st. 2011.
It's all here, with precise calculations based on dates in the Bible (of course, you have to accept that creation took place on 11,013 BC for those calculations to work).
http://www.ebiblefellowship.com/may21/index.html
Posted by: axeonos | October 22, 2009 1:08 PM
can god just decide on what day it is so i can put in my 2 weeks notice???
srsly funny though
Posted by: Jack
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October 22, 2009 1:09 PM
If you manage to look through that demented psychedelic splatter you'll see he's now put it back to November 4th.
OMG WILL WE NEVER BE FREE OF THE ANXIETY
Posted by: Frank b
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October 22, 2009 1:18 PM
The International Earth Destruction Advisory Board said that Sept 10, 2008 at 07:35 was the moment of geocide. I was born exactly 56 years before that, give or take 20 minutes. I wonder if there is anything in the Bible or other ancient text about the number 56. I'll have to ask my wife or kids if I am starting to glow or levitate. If I do gain cosmic importance, my first act will be free beer for everyone.
Posted by: Cuttlefish, OM, CR
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October 22, 2009 1:22 PM
I will always be,
Proudly, a Last-Tuesdayist
Suck it, vertebrate!
http://digitalcuttlefish.blogspot.com/2009/08/last-tuesdayism.html
Posted by: Brock | October 22, 2009 1:23 PM
Free beer? All hail messiah Frank b! (as long as he keeps it flowing :)
Posted by: jdhuey
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October 22, 2009 1:23 PM
If God created the world/universe just recently but He had gone to all that effort to make it APPEAR to be be billions of years old then wouldn't that mean that all of those YECs are in opposition to God's will? They are committing blasphemy to claim the world is any age other than what the God-placed evidence shows.
Posted by: Osh | October 22, 2009 1:26 PM
Actually, the world did end, but turns out the after life isn't all that different. It's all about the details. So if you look in your sock drawer, and find no unmatched socks you went to heaven. Otherwise .....
Posted by: The Pint
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October 22, 2009 1:29 PM
@ 32: "Everyone knows that the MAC community is just like a religion anyway."
"MAC! Teacher, mother, secret lover."
*hugs Mac tightly and does best Homer Simpson impression*
Posted by: Glen Davidson
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October 22, 2009 1:33 PM
Doesn't matter anyway, since Jesus returned in 1914, as the Jehovah's Witnesses like to point out.
Or anyhow, it only matters if you become a JW, since that's the only way anybody in this god-forsaken world can be saved from eternal destruction.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p
Posted by: longstreet
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October 22, 2009 1:44 PM
As someone assigned to an urgent project, the initiation date for which has been postponed weekly since August, I can say that in my experience, the problem is lawyers. Or possible the SEC (or appropriate regulatory agency). Someone is holding out on the signing somewhere, looking for a bigger piece of the pie. I suspect that Lucifer is negotiating for a Golden Parachute and Jehovah is trying to get the severance pay clause excised.
As it stands now, all sinners get six months in heaven if the world ends within a year past signing.
I think the negotiations are going to take awhile.
Posted by: MrFire
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October 22, 2009 1:45 PM
I mean, what's an error window of 7009 years when you're talking about 4004 B.C.? Pfft.
Posted by: Andreas Johansson
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October 22, 2009 1:47 PM
I wish!(having recovered just enough from the (swine?) flu not to need 12+h of sleep a day, days of dozing hit back back in the form of a bad case of insomnia, while still being too sick to do anything much.)
Posted by: Teadusemees | October 22, 2009 1:47 PM
Found this:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Disappointment
I quote:
"The Great Disappointment was a major event in the history of the Millerite movement, a 19th century American Christian sect. William Miller, a Baptist preacher, prophesied that Jesus Christ would return to the earth during the year 1844. A more specific date, that of October 22, 1844, was calculated by Samuel S. Snow. Jesus did not appear as expected on the appointed day and as a result October 22, 1844, became known as the Great Disappointment."
So, how many Great Disappointments they need to finally come to the real world?
Posted by: Happy Tentacles
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October 22, 2009 1:48 PM
My pet cockroaches are deeply disappointed. They've always been told that when human civilisation ends, they're the ones who get to inherit the Earth, and they'd been looking forward to their era of world domination. Now they're all sitting in the corner of their vivarium looking glum.
I do wish these irresponsible humans who keep promising the end of the world would bear in mind the psychological effects of their false prophecies on our invertebrate brethren.
Posted by: Andreas Johansson
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October 22, 2009 1:49 PM
Aleph-null.Posted by: B166ER
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October 22, 2009 1:54 PM
Well, the Tribulation must have begun, because c'mon, IT'S A PROPHESY! Seriously, PROPHESY! It has to be true since the end of the 7 year Tribulation period ends in 2015, so a true religious mathematician would know that the beginning would be 2009, right? Speaking of the end of the world, makes me think of a great song by a great band.
Meltdown by Citizen Fish
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0TJ-hCMX7-4
From the Leftover Crack/Citizen Fish Split album.
No Gods, No Masters
Cameron
Posted by: uppity cracka | October 22, 2009 1:55 PM
i am sooooooooooooooo hungover:
http://www.ojar.com/view_11614.htm
Posted by: longstreet
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October 22, 2009 1:59 PM
@Glen 48
I never quite understood that JW preoccupation with 'the meek shall inherit the Earth.'
I mean, isn't Earth a sort of second prize? First prize is sitting at the right hand of God in Heaven (He must have an infinte number of right hands, or one very large one with club seating). Why would they want the earth?
I mean, I understand why I would want it, especially once the religious have been cleared off, but if the thing is going to be infested with missionaries, I may have to give it a pass.
I mean, what are the meek going to do with it? Sit around in groups too shy to talk to one another?
And who are the witnesses going to witness to?
That's a big issue with devoting your life to getting into the afterlife: Once you get there, you don't know how to do anything else, and you've got eternity not to know how to do it in. If all you've got is a skill in is convincing other people to accept God, you're not going to be very useful in heaven, where everyone can have lunch with him on Tuesdays.
Maybe that's the whole point.
God has angels to do the important things, but I'll bet those suckers don't much care for emptying chamber pots. The whole creation of man was the result of arbitration in a labor dispute, designed to get cheap, unskilled, gullible labor to run the heavenly waste-disposal system.
Posted by: Newfie
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October 22, 2009 2:00 PM
The world did end yesterday.... for a new HP 4 in 1. The scan drivers wouldn't work... 8 hours of latest drivers, patches, tweaks and standing on my head spitting nickles could not get it work. The new Canon 4 in 1 installed beautifully this morning... 2 minutes.
But, take solace. All of that frustration, did not invoke prayer.
Posted by: Roland J Branconnier | October 22, 2009 2:08 PM
As I always say: "If you are going to predict, predict often. Even a broken clock is right twice a day!"
Posted by: Victor | October 22, 2009 2:13 PM
It is comforting to know that the world is one week old at most. It allows me to trust in the concrete and unambiguous moral code set down at the whim of some sort of mysterious something for some reason.
Posted by: Outlaw
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October 22, 2009 2:23 PM
They changed it again. They now believe the date for the rapture is November 4th, 2009.
Keep guessing, guys! Sooner or later you're bound to get it right!
Posted by: robinsrule
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October 22, 2009 2:34 PM
Enjoy our disposable planet!
Posted by: Richard Eis
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October 22, 2009 2:39 PM
-A million New Yorkers were good Last Thursday... were you?-
Well I was boring as i stayed home...isn't that the same thing?
-My pet cockroaches are deeply disappointed-
They clearly weren't meek enough.
Posted by: davem
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October 22, 2009 2:39 PM
The Vogons have just informed me that The date for the destruction of Earth is now Next Tuesday. They apologise for the delay, which is apparently due to the Quartermaster General getting carried away reciting poetry, and forgetting to fill in the forms in triplicate.
Posted by: nitramnaed | October 22, 2009 2:47 PM
Woke up this morning and my wife was gone.
I thought....DUDT, Raptured!
Turns out I just snore.
Posted by: InfuriatedSciTeacher
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October 22, 2009 2:54 PM
He has to vote forever? What is this, a Republican Primary?
Posted by: mothwentbad
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October 22, 2009 3:04 PM
No, you fools! NEXT TUESDAYISM is the way!
Everything that you think is happening now isn't really happening. It's all just a fake memory being remembered by someone else in some future time in a universe which won't even exist until NEXT TUESDAY, created with falsified memories, light in transit, fossils carefully planted with geographic distributions and isotope ratios just so, etc.
This is the truth. It might be hard to believe now, but it will all be clear next Tuesday when you think back to today and think maybe it didn't really happen, after all. And then you will be a Last Tuesdayist again, but remember... I had it right all along. I had it right before I even existed. Or rather, I will falsely remember myself having been right.
CONVERT OR SUFFER, FOOLS!
Posted by: David Marjanović, OM | October 22, 2009 3:05 PM
Because only 144,000 people will go to heaven. So is it written in the Revelation to John. :-|
Posted by: Parse
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October 22, 2009 3:10 PM
I don't believe in Last Thursdayism, but rather Thursday Nextism. Next Thursday, the world will be reduced to text and then rewritten. Rumor has it that Alice will also be getting jam then as well.
Posted by: Brownian, Most Vicious & Petty of Pharyngulites
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October 22, 2009 3:30 PM
The world ended, eh?
Meh. I feel fine.
Posted by: Curiouslycurious | October 22, 2009 3:54 PM
"The meek shall inherit the earth."
Perhaps the meek have already inherited the earth... but they are just too darn non-confrontational to mention it to anyone.
Posted by: Shadow
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October 22, 2009 3:57 PM
DM @68:
IIRC, only 12,000 Jewish males (from each tribe of Israel) who have not been corrupted by women's touch will attain heaven.
Not being a male Jewish virgin, I wouldn't be qualified anyway -- besides, the really cool people will still be around.
Posted by: HombreMoleculos
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October 22, 2009 4:39 PM
I made the mistake of revisiting that site. My eyes still hurt.
Posted by: Vicars Daughter
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October 22, 2009 5:21 PM
I'm with you, Parse! Do we get to keep the dodo?
Speaking of pets, when the tribulation starts do all us heathens types get Tribbles to play with? Do we? Do we?! *bounce* Cos they're cute!
Posted by: MadScientist
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October 22, 2009 5:24 PM
Goddamn - I missed the end of the world - AGAIN!
Posted by: MikeM | October 22, 2009 5:38 PM
Send me a couple lenses for my FE-410, and I promise, I won't let the very fabric of our universe crumble.
Posted by: Happy Tentacles
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October 22, 2009 6:20 PM
My pet cockroaches are going into therapy because of all this! They're like kids who have been told they won't get a birthday party.
Can I sue the people who put out all these 'end of civilisation' rumours, in order to pay off the costs of cockroach psychotherapy?
Posted by: woozy | October 22, 2009 6:30 PM
It seems they have decided to stop committing to a date -- it now says just "fall 2009." That gives them till Dec. 21, technically.
They also say it will take seven years so maybe it started in Sept 21 and we haven't been paying attention. I begins with Christians leaving the earth (and, whoa dude, since September 21st literally *thousands* of christians have died!!!!) over a 7 year period. Meanwhile the omens have been occuring but we just happened to miss that story about the iguana biting that man's toes in the subway. We got seven more years to go, baby!
Then in January, 2016 we'll look around and realize that all the christian wingnuts still as populous are really self-deluded hypocrates (whereas before Sept. 21st they were all true believers). Then when they start going on about whatever we can turn to them and say "Ha, I know for a fact that the rapture already happened! So you're just a faker! Ha!"
I look forward to the post-rapture.
Posted by: Crudely Wrott | October 22, 2009 7:47 PM
It's impossible for anyone else but me to notice or even suspect the end/beginning of the world. That's because ever time I close my eyes, even to blink, the whole universe ceases to exist. When my eyes open, there it is again, in its totality. And there you all are too! How lovely to see you again.
*I can't be the only one who has noticed this, can I?*
Posted by: John Harshman
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October 22, 2009 9:28 PM
Hate to rain on all this, but you're missing the actual prediction. It wasn't of the end of the world, but of the Rapture, and the beginning of the Tribulation. So all that should have happened by now is the disappearance of all the fundies. Have you seen any today?
Oh, and don't be too happy about it. The next seven years are supposed to be pretty nasty for all concerned. And *then* the world ends.
Posted by: Cowcakes | October 23, 2009 1:24 AM
My good friend the Athiest Chaplain and I have long known that we were the gods and inhabitants of a universe governed by a multi-person pantheistic solipsism, namely us. All arguments to the contrary can easily be explained by the fact we are both sick fucks who have populated our creation with a range of conflicting ideas as we love nothing better than to while away the hours debating the obscure and irrelevant and taunting the religious over a few cold beers.
Which reminds me, its almost pub time so adieu to you all and don't forget to pray to us or we will be quite cross.
Posted by: Peter Mc
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October 23, 2009 2:43 AM
Tuesdayism, Thursdayism. This Dayism is in need of a reformation.
Light the pyres!
Posted by: Anubis Bloodsin the third
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October 23, 2009 4:19 AM
Which ever way the religious slop is dished...it ends up rather tepid smelly and nauseous loaded effluent.
You really have to be completely fucking retarded and extremely stupid with it to accept anything on that site has connection with the real world!
It is a continuous diatribe of twisted fatuous inanity
And the plethora of dates and time lines for this that and the other are designed to add a layer of faux respectability to palpable nonsense.
Pretending deep biblical analysis and promting the religious right agenda in demonizing Obama...who apparently the author regards as the strongest sign that the end times are indeed here cos 'Barry' is the anti-christ as predicted by scripture.
Funny thing is a few of the links transport you to a money fleecing.
And the author has the audacity to say that past dates flaunted as the end of times are disappointing in that they were a flop...surprise surprise!
I like the part where he claims this....
...Kindda reminds one of...Sums it up perfectly methinks!
One might be excused for considering the crap an elaborate poe.
If anyone had had the fortitude the time and the inclination to persevere without brain melt...you come to this passage of false humility.
Sad really because it reveals the fundy frothing insanity right there...and they are nowhere near capable of sensing the irony!
The site speaks for itself, bad text formatting and rancid taste in web design and hysterical in juvenile breathless pompous and incessant delivery, and an obvious naive and baffle 'em with bullshite' mentality.
So much time spent in correlating vague and dubious dates and assumptions and outright lies...using other equally deluded and mentally flawed sources and videos to collaborate nonsense!
So much time and effort...and so much worthless inane bollocks.
And I wonder how many folks buy into it?
More then is healthy...that is the sadness!
Posted by: GAZZA
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October 23, 2009 5:29 AM
Crudely@79: Yes, of course we'd noticed. Stop blinking, you selfish bastard. :)
Posted by: Peter Ellis | October 23, 2009 5:30 AM
Heretic! Both the LastTuesdayists and LastThursdayists are misguided fools of the worst sort and worthy only to be burned at the stake. Or at least moderately sunburned.
The only true religion is that of the NextTuesdayists. We don't believe the world will be destroyed next Tuesday. That would be far too simple.
No, the Profound Truth of NextTuesdayism is that the world will be created next Tuesday, once our Creator's had a lie-in and a nice sandwich. You, me, and everything around us exist in potentia as the false memories of the people we are about to become some time next week, assuming nothing crops up unexpectedly in the meantime.
Posted by: Darkchilde
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October 23, 2009 5:59 AM
I am a Last Fridayist.
I found evidence that the world is being created anew every Friday; after all we all like to have a nice weekend and forget the rest :-)
So, the Creator of the World and all that lies within and outside of the universe, are being created every Friday, so that we can first relax before the week starts. We are borne relaxed and get destroyed when tired.
So, the Creator creates us every Friday, relaxes on the weekend, and sees what kind of creatures he has created this time... and then gets bored and does it all over again!
Posted by: MikeB | October 23, 2009 9:21 AM
Pratchett would be proud. Excellent PZ.
Posted by: Average Earthman | October 23, 2009 9:24 AM
This explains why I never could get the hang of Thursdays
Posted by: Esmitt | October 23, 2009 9:24 AM
Mr. Pratchett would be proud. Well done PZ.
Posted by: Crudely Wrott | October 23, 2009 9:44 AM
GAZZA @ 84: I made every possible effort to keep one eye open while I slept last night, knowing that you deserve an uninterrupted existence.
You may want to reflect on the damage done to my eyelid by the toothpick I used to prop it open. I must have rolled over in my sleep.
Could I borrow your tweezers, please?
Posted by: Shala | October 23, 2009 10:01 AM
The funny part is that yesterday we had a power outage in our classroom. Since there are no windows, we were left in the pitch black. I was reading the posts about this 'apocalypse' in the meantime and thought "oh god were they actually right for once".
Posted by: Tige Gibson | October 23, 2009 8:38 PM
There should be a reference to the Ripping Friends in here. The Man from Next Thursday.
Posted by: EricK
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October 24, 2009 7:33 PM
Let's use the Wayback Machine to see another massive fail
I have now figured out that the Xian symbol seen on the back of many a minivan in fact means "Go Fish".