Cuttlekitsch : Pharyngula

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PZ Myers is a biologist and associate professor at the University of Minnesota, Morris.
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People whose history and future were threatened each day by extinction considered that it was only by divine intervention that they were able to live at all. I find it interesting that the meanest life, the poorest existence, is attributed to God's will, but as human being become more affluent, as their living standard and style begin to ascend the material scale, God descends the scale of respectability at a commensurate speed.

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Cuttlekitsch

Category: Art • Cephalopods • Weirdness
Posted on: December 9, 2009 3:38 PM, by PZ Myers

I'd happily hang that on my wall. The trophy wife would even more cheerfully tear it down, shred it, and set it on fire. But then, she's the one with taste^*.

^*Don't judge her by her taste in men. That was a momentary lapse of reason, a one time thing.

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Comments

Posted by: blf | December 9, 2009 3:48 PM

Don't judge [the Trophy Wife] by her taste in men. That was a momentary lapse of reason, a one time thing.

Look, it's really time you should pull out the nails, take the poor guy's body down, and give it a decent burial.

Posted by: Glen Davidson | December 9, 2009 3:49 PM

Damn the people with taste!

Besides, how many other decorations for Squidmas can you find?

Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p

Posted by: The Science Pundit | December 9, 2009 3:50 PM

What would the cephalo-equivalent to the manger be? A fishing hole?

Posted by: daveau | December 9, 2009 3:51 PM

Don't you have an office at work to hang it?

Posted by: Alyson Miers | December 9, 2009 3:52 PM

It's really quite a pretty painting. You could even make the case that it's not intended to be blasphemous, just eccentric. Not that there's anything wrong with blasphemy; it is our civic duty, but sometimes it's fun to just be strange.

Posted by: DyeGal41 | December 9, 2009 4:05 PM

Good subject matter - epic art fail

Posted by: BBCaddict | December 9, 2009 4:09 PM

The "view it in a room" link is absolutely wonderful.

"It's a trap!"
Never so true as when referring to a religion. Even a squiddy one.

Posted by: Zernk | December 9, 2009 4:10 PM

Did you "VIEW IT IN A ROOM"? That's really something, right there, I must say. Looks like Dodi & Di in the stained glass, but I can't figure out the rest of the iconography.

Posted by: 'Tis Himself, OM | December 9, 2009 4:11 PM

O..........

......kay.

_{I guess.}

#10

Posted by: Sigmund | December 9, 2009 4:22 PM

It reminds me of one I did a few months back.
http://sneerreview.blogspot.com/2009/07/immaculate-conception-no-miracles.html

#11

Posted by: https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawnuObLX6yuJoXu_rZIZFmWBo9fQIEjZFb0 | December 9, 2009 4:25 PM

#8 Zernk: Read the rest of the site (http://www.regretsy.com) and the iconography will make more sense.

#12

Posted by: Dahan | December 9, 2009 4:30 PM

Agree with DyeGal41,

I will never use this in an art appreciation class I teach.

#13

Posted by: St.B | December 9, 2009 4:42 PM

That does NOT look like the milkman...

#14

Posted by: eddie | December 9, 2009 4:45 PM

Terrible pun in the link address. Nice pic, tho.

#15

Posted by: Audley Z. Darkheart OM, purveyor of candy and lies | December 9, 2009 4:53 PM

But it only costs $20!

The trophy wife should get over her "taste" (I suppose she probably has "class," too. Pshaw.) and admire your thriftiness!

#16

Posted by: Zernk | December 9, 2009 5:05 PM

#11: Goodness, that's a funny place. So it's Charles & Di after all. The aspect ratio error in the stained glass makes me wonder if Dodi was just like Chuck but shorter & thicker where it counts.

#17

Posted by: bcoppola | December 9, 2009 5:11 PM

Hey, at only $20 we could all pitch in, what, 25 cents or so each to give it to PZ for X-mas*, the TW's "taste" be hanged.

--
X = winter festival or observance of your choice.

#18

Posted by: Cuttlefish, OM, CR | December 9, 2009 5:33 PM

Some say Mary never knew she had been impregnated while swimming...

... but I suspect Mary had an inkling.

#19

Posted by: swashzone | December 9, 2009 5:46 PM

Trophy wife, my ink! I'd rather have a mimic octopus for a consort ... variety being a spice and all that.

#20

Posted by: hankroberts | December 9, 2009 6:58 PM

"... it's no longer even socially useful to express anti- (there should be a lovely little squid icon here, but only visible if you view it at its original page, linked below -- recommended) sentiments."
http://www.hoocoodanode.org/node/8574#comment-1040693

#21

Posted by: stan.ferguson | December 9, 2009 7:04 PM

I hope that wasn't a conscious reference to One Slip!

#22

Posted by: Peter G. | December 9, 2009 7:23 PM

Is there a psychological term for a permanent momentary lapse of reason? I'm just asking 'cause the possibility exists my lady may come out of hers.

#23

Posted by: whitebird | December 9, 2009 7:55 PM

That came to my mind, too, stan.ferguson @ 21. But then again my only tattoo is from the cover of Saucerful of Secrets...

#24

Posted by: 'Tis Himself, OM | December 9, 2009 8:20 PM

Mary O'Nette #24

I'm impressed by your literacy in High Martian.

#25

Posted by: Janine, She Wolf Of Pharyngula, OM | December 9, 2009 8:25 PM

Round yon virgin mother and child
Holy cuttlefish, so tender and mild

#26

Posted by: Smoggy Batzrubble OM4Jesus | December 9, 2009 9:37 PM

In the spirit of Christmas squidding, I hereby to offer my own attack upon a master:

NAUTILIDAEA: A SQUIDMAS POEM
Adapted from John Undonne by Smoggy
----------------------------------

Immensity tentacled, thy aragonite womb,
Rides now some deep-upwelling fountainhead,
To glide on nacreous softness; coated
Strength enough, now into the depths and gone;
Yet not, for is the phragmocone denied a septum new?
Then pierce it in this stall, and, safe, its siphuncle
Spirals and wise nature’s travail to prevent
The effect of pressure’s jealous general doom.
Seest thou, the logarithm, with thy artist’s eyes, how It
When whorl of shell apart, cryptic holds, It quiet lies?
Were not these tentacles before numbered higher,
That would have need to be too many for thee?
Feast then, and let nine teeth upon thee grow,
For what’s behind blind septa, only the camerae know.

#27

Posted by: Smoggy Batzrubble OM4Jesus | December 9, 2009 10:03 PM

And here’s a second version with shit like rhyme and meter

NAUTILIDAEA: A SQUIDMAS POEM (2)
Adapted from John Undonne by Smoggy
----------------------------------
Of tentacles, aragonite thy tomb,
Ride now the deep-upwelling fountain bloom,
To glide on nacreous softness; coated stone
Strength now into the deeps of dark and gone;
Yet not, for does the phragmocone descry
A septum new? Then pierce its stall and try
Spirals and wise nature’s travail, assume
Effects of pressure’s jealous general doom.
Seest thou, the logarithm, with artist’s eyes,
When whorl of shell apart It quiet lies?
Should not these tentacles unnumbered be,
That would have need to be too few for thee?
Feast then, and let nine teeth upon thee grow,
And life behind blind septa, camerae know.

#28

Posted by: Noadi | December 9, 2009 10:05 PM

Just last night I was saying on Twitter that I wanted to do a cephalopod nativity with a baby Cthulhu and then I found out someone already sort of had the same idea.

#29

Posted by: Cuttlefish, OM, CR | December 9, 2009 10:42 PM

A) do it anyway, Noadi--your stuff kicks ass.

B) Smoggy, I think I love you, in a pentametric/KJV-approved sort of way.

C) PZ, how dare you call this post "cuttlekitsch", when it is clearly an inferior squid in the pic?

Silent night... Holy shit!
Jeebus squid... time to split!
There, the virgin Mother of god
In her arms, a cephalopod
Sleep, with squid in your dreeeeeeeeams
Sleep, with squid in your dreams.

Silent night, Holy shit!
Divers quake, they'll admit
Inky clouds turn sea to black
Darkness hides his cruel attack
Architeuthis is heeeeeere!
Architeuthis is here!

Silent night, Holy shit!
Benthic child, throws a fit
Ripping beak and tearing arms,
Deadly beauty; killing charms
Jeebus, squid, at thy biiiiiirrrrrth
Jeebus, squid, at thy birth

#30

Posted by: PZ Myers | December 9, 2009 10:49 PM

"Mary O'Nette" was a Piltdown Man drive-by. Now expunged, and a new entry in the filter file made.

#31

Posted by: Cuttlefish, OM, CR | December 9, 2009 11:07 PM

Damn, you're fast.

#32

Posted by: coyotenose | December 9, 2009 11:13 PM

"What do we do with it?"

"Burn it!"

"We would have to wash it to burn it!"

#33

Posted by: Aratina Cage | December 9, 2009 11:22 PM

If we were really militants, Trophy Wife would have ink on her hands.

#34

Posted by: Silent One | December 9, 2009 11:23 PM

Octomom....Decamom? Well, perhaps not, but where does it say baby jebus wasn't a cuttlefish type thingy? Boy, child etc... are rather vague. However, that draws attention from this magnificent technical and allegorical acheivement which should certainly be included in the august collection of the MoBA: http://www.museumofbadart.org.

As a paitner, I am humbled.

#35

Posted by: Silič O'Nopolitanopoulos, Färschdbischuf Beesknees aus Ulm und Klein Elguth, Elector Pharynguline. | December 10, 2009 11:19 AM

Speaking of art (or approximations thereof).

I'm very disappointed in you pharyngulistas!

The adorable platypus only came in third in the poll on what is to be the next squishable.

Shame on you!

#36

Posted by: Aratina Cage | December 10, 2009 11:35 AM

Sili, I seem to have caught your posts about the squishy platypus and voted for it three times if that's any consolation for you. ("Like herding cats" comes to mind.)

#37

Posted by: DLC | December 11, 2009 11:07 AM

And they laid the baby cephalojesus in a fish tank, and the wise men were sore afraid.

#38

Posted by: fatpie42 | December 12, 2009 6:36 AM