…and this is a 
A fondness for quacks.
Fox News brought on a naturopath to peddle a random bit of nonsense, that coffee makes you fat. Any drug that tinkers with your metabolism can have some unexpected effects, but to claim that a cup of black coffee is "worse than five hot fudge sundaes" is irresponsible insanity.
In other woo news: Fox News invited Ann de Wees Allen to tell its viewers that black coffee will make you "fatter than a pig." This segment is a textbook example of how not to do science journalism. The voice over identifies de Wees Allen as "Doctor"--without mentioning that she claims neither a medical degree, nor a doctorate. Her website says she's a doctor of naturopathy. Fox also neglects to mention that Allen appears to have a sideline selling something called "Skinny Coffee"--an alternative to that fattening old joe.
Meanwhile, the HuffPo continues its adoration of homeopathy. No, not homeopathy: the quacks have come up with a new, impressive, pseudoscientific term for it now. It's Nanopharmacology. It's all wrapped up in a primer on quackery.
Homeopathic medicines are made through a specific pharmacological process of dilution and vigorous shaking. However, when skeptics say that there is nothing but water in homeopathic medicine, they are proving their ignorance, despite the incredible arrogance in which they make these assertions.
The skeptics aren't making arrogant assertions: the homeopaths who are bilking people with useless nostrums are. Here's a good reply to homeopathy:
Medicine & Health
Comments
Posted by: Glen Davidson
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December 14, 2009 1:28 PM
Oh lord, some appetite suppressants have actually included caffeine. I don't know if it's true, but I heard that one study claimed that caffeine decreased appetite in males, not in females.
I don't doubt that what many eat along with black coffee makes many people fat, but it's almost certainly not the coffee itself.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p
Posted by: ckitching
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December 14, 2009 1:30 PM
Yep...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMGIbOGu8q0
Posted by: redmonster
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December 14, 2009 1:31 PM
This is supposed to make them sound knowledgeable? They're not even trying, the ridiculous quacks.
Alyson Miers
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp
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December 14, 2009 1:36 PM
Well thank goodness the shaking is vigorous. I would hate to take
a fakean amazing treatment what was not treated to lackadaisical shaking.That would be terrible.
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp
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December 14, 2009 1:39 PM
grumble
Posted by: daveau
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December 14, 2009 1:41 PM
I had to stop reading here:
Or, perhaps not.
Posted by: Sven DiMilo
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December 14, 2009 1:44 PM
because arithmetic is just so arrogant
Posted by: Algernon, elle sans chapeau
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December 14, 2009 1:46 PM
Ugh. Nano. You know there's always some word that people borrow to use as a marketing gimmick. My old stove says "solid-state" on it. Was there a time when stoves had vacuum tubes or something? My hair dryer is marked up with slogans about "infrared heat waves" and now I guess I can put a tag that says "nanotech" on my kitchen sink.
Posted by: cervantes
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December 14, 2009 1:48 PM
There are two institutions in the United States, alas, that offer degrees called Doctor of Naturopathic Medicine (ND). The Executive Director of an agency I used to work for has one, and he had himself introduced as "Doctor X" when he spoke publicly. What can you do? Quackwatch has good info on the Bastyr University scam.
Posted by: t3knomanser
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December 14, 2009 1:54 PM
It's a simple matter to silence the skeptics once and for all: demonstrate that a homeopathic treatment is more effective than a placebo is a controlled, double-blind study.
There's no need to appeal to emotions, no need to decry the evils of the establishment. Just design a basic experiment, ensure that the controls are sound, and execute it. There are established protocols and best-practices for medical trials that should make it easy to design this process.
As it says on the Missouri license plate, Show Me.
Posted by: nejishiki
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December 14, 2009 1:55 PM
"HOMOEOPATHY, n. A school of medicine midway between Allopathy and Christian Science. To the last both the others are distinctly inferior, for Christian Science will cure imaginary diseases, and they can not."
Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary (1911)
Posted by: destlund
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December 14, 2009 1:57 PM
Nanopharmacology? I thought they were arguing that their medicines worked on a quantum scale. Still the "pharmacological process of dilution and vigorous shaking" line gave me a good chuckle. I don't think they understand the meaning of "pharmacological," or "pharmaceutical," for that matter.
Posted by: Greg F.
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December 14, 2009 1:57 PM
PZ, how could you be so close-minded? There's a homeopathic doctor who explains exactly how water retains the medicinal properties put in it. It's just radioactive nano-crystals...
http://worldofweirdthings.com/2009/11/28/homeopathic-physics-abuse-take-two/
Duh! So basically homeopathy is just deadly hazmat which turns beneficial when it comes in contact with your auras and flows around your quantum chakras.
Oh you arrogant scientists you with your big words and biology, and chemistry, and chemistry...
Posted by: Traveler
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December 14, 2009 1:59 PM
The least they could do is give an accurate description of the preparation of homeopathic medicines. There's more to it than just dilution and shaking! They forgot to mention thumping it on a leather pad! You'd have to be soft in the head to think that just dilution and shaking would have any effect.
I wonder if there are vegan-safe alternatives that use some sort of simulated leather in their preparation?
Posted by: Anubis Bloodsin the third
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December 14, 2009 1:59 PM
This stenches quite nauseous of Creationism tactics.
When called on their utter stupidity and they finally noticed a sceptical attitude to their severe inanity, an attitude that has all but affectively ruled it out of science lessons, they called it ID!
The moral of this story kiddies is when a claim is comprehensively and completely debunked...just change the title of the premise!
Lots of folks fall for that ruse and it remains a religious stock in trade!
Posted by: Victor
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December 14, 2009 2:00 PM
Well, if the black coffee claim were true I would weigh in around 500 lbs. As it is, I'm about 150. Now, if they include Grande Mocha Latte Frappacino with extra whipped cream and a side of fudge brownie as "coffee", then maybe they have something.
Posted by: Greg F.
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December 14, 2009 2:02 PM
Whoops, pardon the lack of proofreading skills at the end of my earlier comment. Or you can just pretend it's an echo... =)
Posted by: realinterrobang
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December 14, 2009 2:02 PM
I thought caffeine was supposed to make you lose weight.
On the other hand, if your version of coffee is so freighted down with cream and sugar and stuff it's the caloric equivalent of a couple of Big Macs, then perhaps, but that's not the coffee itself making you fat...
Posted by: gadfly47
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December 14, 2009 2:07 PM
But Billy Joel's daughter is alive today because of homeopathy. She was quite lucky she didn't swallow a handful of "real" medicine. ;)
Posted by: ritebrother
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December 14, 2009 2:08 PM
Caffeine (and other metylxanthines, like theophyline) are phosphodiesterase inhibitors, and as such can prolong hormone responses that function through the stimulation of cAMP production. The phosphorylation of multiple metabolic enzymes (which controls their activity), is mediated by protein kinase A, which is activated by cAMP. As a specific example, caffeine prolongs the window of activation of glycogen phosphorylase, and thus glycogen catabolism, in the fasting state. So, there is a grain of truth to the fact that caffeine can affect metabolic flux, but the extrapolation noted in the post is preposterous. In fact, the effect would likely be catabolic overall.
Posted by: Caine, ghetto féministe
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December 14, 2009 2:08 PM
I hate to break this to them, but dilution and shaking (no matter how vigorous) ain't exactly rocket science. Or dragon magic, for that matter.
Posted by: Michelle R
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December 14, 2009 2:08 PM
I laughed at the homeopathic comic! It really DOES work!
Posted by: Joshua Zelinsky
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December 14, 2009 2:11 PM
I really am thankful for Huffington Post. It is an excellent example for the fact that no end of the political spectrum is inherently better about science. It is a convenient coincidence that on many issues today the science happens to support the more progressive ideologies. But if that were not the case, we would likely simply see a support on which ideologues objected to science.
I'm sure James Bond is happy about these remedies. He prefers his homeopathic medicines to be vigorously shaken, not vigorously stirred.
I like the random claim about silica also. There's an obvious way to test this: See if homeopathic remedies which have been prepared in other containers (such as plastic ones) are less or effective. I wonder why they won't do this? Ok. I'm not actually wondering...
Posted by: Greg F.
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December 14, 2009 2:11 PM
@Victor, #16:
"...if they include Grande Mocha Latte Frappacino with extra whipped cream and a side of fudge brownie as 'coffee'"
The drink mentioned above is not as much coffee as it is an abuse of confectionery ingredients and perfectly good espresso. Don't get me wrong though, lattes are just espresso with some steamed milk. But when you start throwing in flavorings, chocolate and other overpowering sweets, you're killing the coffee. And if you chill the resulting mess down you might as well just get some ice cream instead.
On a serious note, if you drink that on a regular basis, I would not be surprised to see it trigger heart disease somewhere down the line because that's got to be around 600 excess calories...
Posted by: tsg
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December 14, 2009 2:12 PM
It's been done. It failed. And the first thing the homeopaths did was concoct a bunch of excuses why homeopathy is ineffective in a double-blind study. Oh, and blamed "Big Pharma".
Posted by: SplendidMonkey
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December 14, 2009 2:17 PM
Coincidentally, Science Friday last week had a segment on research showing that coffee drinking seems to help prevent prostate cancer. The more coffee you drank the more protection you got, decaf or regular.
Posted by: chrispatil
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December 14, 2009 2:24 PM
Did you hear about the guy who forgot to take his homeopathic remedy?
He died of an overdose!
.
Posted by: Lynna, OM
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December 14, 2009 2:27 PM
In Ann de Wees Allen's bio, I found this gem:
See http://www.ediblecomputerchips.com/She also has done work for the World Health Organization in develovping a gylcemic index and guidelines.
She holds a bunch of L-arginine patents, and also holds a patent for "Thermogenic adipose tissue fat-burning coffee"
Here is the multi-level-marketing scheme related to Wees Allen:
Jaguar Enterprises
Posted by: InfraredEyes
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December 14, 2009 2:30 PM
Completely off-topic, but you gotta see this: Octopus Snatches Coconut and Runs.
Posted by: https://me.yahoo.com/a/CjyxAD4Sjc53ciVrOA5n_bsv2Pg-#3be60
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December 14, 2009 2:32 PM
I didn't see humor in the comic at first--then I picked up the monitor and shook it vigorously and the hilarity ensued!
Posted by: Dania
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December 14, 2009 2:33 PM
Not at all. It's called... placebo.
Posted by: Lynna, OM
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December 14, 2009 2:34 PM
Quantum Chocolate also comes from Wees Allen. [Warning: website may cause dizziness.]
Quantum Chocolate is mentioned in the list of major achievements on Wees Allen's website, under the heading "Alpha Scientist".
Posted by: drbobironic
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December 14, 2009 2:37 PM
And, to tie the two together, it is -- ISYN -- naturopaths at fully regionally accredited colleges and universities (see aanmc.org) who label their ilk "health science" (see nuhs.edu) and specifically label homeopathy a "clinical science" (see nabne.org).
-r.c.
Posted by: Josh
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December 14, 2009 2:40 PM
The .pdf can be accessed:
http://download.cell.com/current-biology/pdf/PIIS0960982209019149.pdf?intermediate=true
Posted by: Sven DiMilo
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December 14, 2009 2:43 PM
That's just arrogant! It's precise hyperdilution and a special shaking that only a trained and experienced shaker can shake.
Posted by: Rev. BigDumbChimp
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December 14, 2009 2:54 PM
PHARMA SHILLS, THE WHOLE LOT OF YOU
Posted by: blf
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December 14, 2009 3:03 PM
Not anymore. The buggers haven't sent me a cheque in ages… I'm on strike!
Posted by: Pareidolius
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December 14, 2009 3:04 PM
Just left this comment to a comment lamenting the credulity of both the left and the right:
Of course the end of the article is replete with links to all of "Dr." Ullman's books. Huffpo=Daily Mail.
Posted by: Erulóra (formerly KOPD)
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December 14, 2009 3:04 PM
I think you have to have a nanoeducation to think homeopathy actually works.
KOPD
Posted by: Carlie of the lacy, gently wafting adjectives
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December 14, 2009 3:09 PM
Caffeine definitely decreases my appetite.
(Look! I'm an anecdote!)
How, exactly, did she determine that a cup of coffee was worse than five hot fudge sundaes? Why not four? Or six? I'd like to see this "study".
Posted by: Caine, ghetto féministe
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December 14, 2009 3:11 PM
Sven DiMilo @ 35:
And here I thought the Shakers were dying out...
;)
Posted by: Ms. Crazy Pants
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December 14, 2009 3:14 PM
Actually, sitting on your butt watching Fox News is what makes a person fat.
Posted by: Discombob
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December 14, 2009 3:16 PM
Armored octopi!:
http://www.scientificamerican.com/blog/post.cfm?id=a-tool-wielding-octopus-this-invert-2009-12-14
Posted by: Nemo
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December 14, 2009 3:37 PM
The only time I ever lost weight was when I was popping caffeine pills. Not exactly the same as coffee, but still.
I've been tempted to take it up again, but I didn't like what it did to my personality, or my heart.
Posted by: Rutee, Shrieking Harpy of Dooooom
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December 14, 2009 3:38 PM
Nano... pharmacology..
But... that doesn't make sense as a word on its own. Is it pharmaceuticals for organisms less then a nanometer in size?
At least Dr. Drakken used the word to refer to very small things, if not necessarily things that were less then a nanometer big..
Posted by: Sastra
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December 14, 2009 3:58 PM
Trqaveler #14 wrote:
You still forgot the most important factor. According to homeopaths, the purpose of all the shaking and thumping is so that the person holding the bottle may impart their intentionality into the remedy. That's how the water knows which molecules it's supposed to remember. Your intentions -- your needs -- effect matter and energy, and change them.
See? The universe really does care. The laws of chemistry and physics are bent according to what we think and feel. Thoughts are forces.
Homeopathy isn't just bad science: it has that necessary factor of supernaturalism which makes it genuine 'woo.' Once you run across the explanations about intentions-effecting-reality, it all starts to make sense -- in a way. It's pulling its model out of religious intuitions of the moral cosmos: in other words, it's normal, familiar bullshit.
Posted by: 'Tis Himself, OM
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December 14, 2009 4:21 PM
I'm a tea drinker and haven't had a cup of coffee in over a month. So why am I still fat?
Posted by: Diomedes
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December 14, 2009 4:31 PM
Ah "intentions", so that's why we can dismiss contamination of any kind from before and during the recycling of the water.
Like this Mr. Imouto or what was his name who thought good thoughts at water which then when frozen formed only symmetrical crystals (he sells that water too, you know).
But when a homeopathic believer once asked me "where does the information go?", I couldn't answer anything but "when the agent is not detectable it has no effect. It's no longer present." which doesn't answer the question precisely. Homeopaths probably have their own special definition of what information means. But does this question have a meaningful answer?
Posted by: VentureFree
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December 14, 2009 4:31 PM
I can imagine some believers out there pointing to that comic as proof that homeopathy works. I for one think it's quite funny, and I'm sure that they would say that it's precisely because it follows the methodology of homeopathy.
Posted by: Vashti
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December 14, 2009 4:50 PM
Lynna, OM - you are so deserving of that OM!
If you can wade through the utter crap, hilarity can be found:
Posted by: Cowcakes
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December 14, 2009 6:24 PM
Oh my Squid, that link to Huff Po on Nanopharmacology overloaded by bullshit meter and started a fire in the office.
Beind a masochist I then went to http://www.anndeweesallen.com/ and discovered that "The medical and research community states that Dr. Allen's science and technology is "Twenty years ahead of everyone else."
and that she is "Known in the industry for her bold stance of setting high standards in scientific accuracy,"
At that point the bullshit meter exploded and several people in the building needed to be medivaced suffering extreme woo exposure.
Posted by: Traveler
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December 14, 2009 7:02 PM
Sastra @46,
I know that some homeopaths subscribe to the "intention is everything" idea. I've heard of some that claim that the preparations themselves are unnecessary: writing the name of a preparation on a piece of paper, and carrying that in your pocket is enough. But do you know if that's generally accepted as "good homeopathy"? I was under the impression that most of them believed it was some sort of physical magic, not a form of spiritual magic.
Posted by: Carlie of the lacy, gently wafting adjectives
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December 14, 2009 7:15 PM
Because you haven't also cut down to under five hot fudge sundaes a day, right?
Posted by: atomjack
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December 14, 2009 10:28 PM
Black coffee makes you fat?
Dayamn, peops are ignorant. My dad had only black coffee when he drank it, and he was 6 foot one inch and about 160 pounds. Then again, I'm only 5 foot ten, and drink only black coffee and weigh 190. But I can run faster, jump higher and lift more. Right. So, it's a trade.
btw, I DID lose ten pounds within a month when I quit putting creamer in said coffee.
Posted by: MosesZD
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December 14, 2009 11:07 PM
Wow. I drink two-to-four cups a day. I'm 5' 11" and I weighed 179lbs as a HS Senior. I weighed 182lbs as a 28-year-year-old college Senior. I weigh 185lbs now and I'm 48.
If this woman is right, why don't I weigh 400lbs?
Oh yeah, a cup of black coffee has 4 calories. A cup of coffee with cream and one sugar, like I take it, has 50 calories.
Posted by: Pierce R. Butler
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December 14, 2009 11:26 PM
... to claim that a cup of black coffee is "worse than five hot fudge sundaes" is irresponsible insanity.
Speak for yourself, Professor Myers!
If offered that choice, I for one would unhesitatingly park my skinny butt in the seat before the five hot fudge sundaes, spoon in hand, leaving that cup of coffee to any of you caffeine fiends who wants it.
Thus, if the one is better, the other then is worse.
Posted by: https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawncr0FDc8gdl7yJBz0SJ15D0etcTIOtL0s
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December 14, 2009 11:49 PM
Sastra in 46: According to homeopaths, the purpose of all the shaking and thumping is so that the person holding the bottle may impart their intentionality into the remedy.
Waitwaitwait. They make this crap in serious quantities, no? I mean it's an industry. Somehow I'd always pictured a series of something like teeny little paint-can shakers with bottles of water in them... You mean it's people??? It's actual humans with containers of water (adulterated with, well, approximately nothing) sitting around all day and shaking them???! By hand??!
Um.
Um.
What do they pay these people? Do they get RSIs after a year or so? Can they chat while working or do they have to keep count? Can they shake two at a time?
Can they work better if they drink lots and lots of black coffee?
Dammit, where are the media in all this? Where's OSHA?? I want to know!
Posted by: Janine, The Little Top Of Venom, OM
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December 15, 2009 12:08 AM
Drinking black coffee, black coffee, drinking black coffee, staring at the wall
Maybe that is why drinkers of black coffee gains weight.
Posted by: https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawngrONk9mzwC93GngHJFvpqsQcpq7z8uSI
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December 15, 2009 3:06 AM
(Sorry about the identity - google sign in doesn't seem to work brilliantly...)
Anyway, what worries me is what size these five fudge sundaes are, and whether or not there is some kind of metric standard of sundaes. If so, that's presumably five standard chocolate fudge sundaes, but just two mega chocolate fudge sundaes, but several thousand millisundaes?
Posted by: T. Bruce McNeely
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December 15, 2009 4:16 AM
Heh, when I was in university, I weighed between 125 and 135 lb. at 5 ft 11 in. Yeah, I was pretty scrawny. Good thing I was drinking coffee by the quart, otherwise I would have disappeared.
Posted by: thadd | December 15, 2009 1:30 PM
That comic is a problem, it is actually really funny, which seems to prove homeopathy works.
Posted by: Tom | December 15, 2009 1:46 PM
Greg F, that's not "perfectly good espresso" you're talking about. The reason big chain coffee houses drown their wares in refined sugar and milk fat is because the actual coffee it's based on, due to the cheapness of both ingredients and preparation, is simply vile. Nobody who's even once tasted a real espresso made by someone who actually gave a crap would ever voluntarily drink chain store espresso neat.
Posted by: eddie
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December 15, 2009 1:54 PM
that's a great web comic. One of the many classics from www. .com.
Posted by: eddie
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December 15, 2009 2:03 PM
Re squiggle @57; "Can they shake two at a time?"
Hehehe They can, but it may be dangerous. Instead of failing to treat one condition, they may accidentally fail to treat something else. And someone claimed on here that homeopathy didn't have side-effects...
Posted by: allen | December 15, 2009 2:06 PM
this post reminded me that I had a pot of coffee brewing, and that I needed to drink it.
Posted by: Dark Matter | December 15, 2009 2:34 PM
So Troglodyte TV is running a hit piece on coffee?
Hmmm...Here's a nice breakdown of coffee exporting countries...
http://www.ico.org/prices/m1.htm
How many of these countries are expressing discontent with the War on Terra?
How many of these countries would take a economic
hit with a piece of ill-informed garbage like this flying around the net?
Posted by: https://me.yahoo.com/a/ZyDU9tRwjdYxs1E6KDIi8HEequ1B0UzklwcQ#64549
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May 17, 2011 8:12 AM
Very interesting article. I don't understand web comic.
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