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PZ Myers is a biologist and associate professor at the University of Minnesota, Morris.
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Mary's Monday Metazoan: I told her there's no way anyone will see anything sexual in this photo

Category: Organisms
Posted on: March 15, 2010 7:19 AM, by PZ Myers

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Comments

Posted by: robhoofd | March 15, 2010 7:40 AM

Such a big clam you have!

Posted by: Eileen | March 15, 2010 8:00 AM

Gorgeous. Would be cool (and freaky) if these things were fast enough to eat scuba divers.

Posted by: scooterKPFT | March 15, 2010 8:05 AM

I use hydrogen peroxide to get rid of that green fur infection.

Posted by: Macallan | March 15, 2010 8:13 AM

It's a hairy clam!

Posted by: Rorschach | March 15, 2010 8:19 AM

I told her there's no way anyone will see anything sexual in this photo

Ahem.
I didn't adopt this nick for nothing.

I can see the remnants of the swallowed diver clearly.

Posted by: Zeno | March 15, 2010 8:47 AM

Why is its pubic hair green?

Posted by: nick.winnick | March 15, 2010 8:57 AM

The caption for this photo at the National Geographic page calls it "the largest of all mollusks."

Are they using some strange definition of mollusk that doesn't include cephalopoda? By size and weight, the colossal squid has the giant clam beat, tentacles down.

Posted by: JackC | March 15, 2010 9:03 AM

Clams got legs?

Posted by: Thebear, just an agent of peas | March 15, 2010 9:24 AM

This reminds me of Do you feel like swimming

I can't see how anybody could see anything in that song either...

#10

Posted by: https://login.launchpad.net/+id/bkPsMFK | March 15, 2010 9:27 AM

That sounds like a challenge.

#11

Posted by: toth | March 15, 2010 9:29 AM

In what crazy, topsy-turvy world could the word "clam" ever be considered sexual!!?!!

#12

Posted by: jacksonskepticalsociety.com | March 15, 2010 9:57 AM

...surely you mean "other than the fact that I'd slip that oyster a bit of the old mother of pearl." Because I don't see any other possible explanation.

Oh I'd totally do that hot, algae encrusted, thick lipped....

Man I gotta go.

#13

Posted by: ppb | March 15, 2010 10:21 AM

Sometimes a clam is just a clam.

#14

Posted by: Quidam | March 15, 2010 10:26 AM

I told her there's no way anyone will see anything sexual in this photo

Depends on whether or not you are a Na'vi

#15

Posted by: ckoral | March 15, 2010 10:38 AM

I have a tridacna maxima in my reef. If you read up on them, wow, they are very neat creatures. Just the way they grind the food particles up that they eat is amazing alone. The symbiosis tridacna's have with zooxanthellae they have just like coral.
I have a reef and every time I look at it, I think about how this must have played a role in the leap from plant to animal. Not sure if that is true, but it seems to be.
Google tridacna for some really nice looking clam pictures.

#16

Posted by: Rachel Bronwyn | March 15, 2010 10:44 AM

These things eat me up every time I play New Super Mario Bros.

#17

Posted by: Glen Davidson | March 15, 2010 11:17 AM

Think pure thoughts, think pure thoughts...

Ha, makes thinking of doing it all the better once the puritanism wears off.

Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/mxaa3p

#18

Posted by: nlorenzo93 | March 15, 2010 11:21 AM

I think it's the largest bivalve mollusk (or mollusc).

#19

Posted by: llewelly | March 15, 2010 11:41 AM

JackC Author | March 15, 2010 9:03 AM:

Clams got legs?

Of course.

#20

Posted by: Aratina Cage | March 15, 2010 12:01 PM

Eww. That comes way too close to accurately depicting an assclam.

#21

Posted by: Brownian, Most Vicious & Petty of Pharyngulites | March 15, 2010 12:14 PM

Google tridacna for some really nice looking clam pictures.

Uh, that's not one of my usual search terms, but I'm game.

From the article:

Giant clams achieve their enormous proportions by consuming the sugars and proteins produced by the billions of algae that live in their tissues.

See, now why can't humans do this? Imagine: a quick inoculation of algae at birth and you'd reduce your need to eat, help sequester atmospheric carbon, and take on a healthy green sheen*.

*Added bonus: you'd be irresistible to girdle-wearing starship captains, should you be into a tumble in the back seat of a Constitution-class Chevy.

#22

Posted by: Margaret | March 15, 2010 1:17 PM

Why is its pubic hair green?

For St. Paddy's Day.

#23

Posted by: and7barton | March 15, 2010 1:30 PM

A clam is just a clam, but a cigar is a SMOKE.

#24

Posted by: daveau | March 15, 2010 2:05 PM

...there's no way anyone will see anything sexual in this photo

Oh, I get it now. It's we who have the dirty minds, not you. See you Wednesday.

#25

Posted by: recovering catholic | March 15, 2010 2:21 PM

"I have a reef and every time I look at it, I think about how this must have played a role in the leap from plant to animal. Not sure if that is true, but it seems to be."

Not sure what you mean by this, but plants and animals diverged from each other WAY before animals and zooxanthellae evolved symbiotic relationships. It is cool, though!

#26

Posted by: Patricia, OM | March 15, 2010 2:53 PM

That's one slutty clam, I know a wanton expression when I see one.

#27

Posted by: https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawk6EuJ25qQXXX6AA1qI20x3qF-U7gYF3Dw | March 15, 2010 3:05 PM

It's spawning.
Regards,
Katkinkate

#28

Posted by: Kraid | March 15, 2010 3:09 PM

PZ and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamvulva.

...or something like that.

#29

Posted by: Son of Murph | March 15, 2010 3:41 PM

If anyone sees anything sexual in this green tinged object they should get help, and probably mongo antibiotics.

#30

Posted by: Sven DiMilo | March 15, 2010 3:45 PM

"I have a reef and every time I look at it, I think about how this must have played a role in the leap from plant to animal. Not sure if that is true, but it seems to be." Not sure what you mean by this, but plants and animals diverged from each other WAY before animals and zooxanthellae evolved symbiotic relationships. It is cool, though!

Better: plants and animals diverged from each other WAY before there were plants and animals. That is, both plants and animals are derived--eventually, and among lots of other branchings--from some single-celled eukaryotic ancestor that lived maybe a billion years ago. They are entirely separate developments, and there was never any leap from one to the other.

Although recently there has been dome crosstalk:
http://www.sciencenews.org/view/generic/id/53496/title/Sea_slug_steals_genes_for_greens,_makes_chlorophyll_like_a_plant

#31

Posted by: jari.pennanen | March 15, 2010 4:02 PM

Interesting Poll results graphic of "Has Pope Benedict done enough to crack down on Catholic priests' sex abuse"

The number of people voted seems rather significant and what do we get? The Iowa has 62% "Yes", and 38% "No". Rest of the world, including other states of US, seems to be on definite "No" side.

#32

Posted by: BlueEyedVideot | March 15, 2010 4:03 PM

I had a bite of that once...I'm still chewing.

#33

Posted by: JackC | March 15, 2010 4:07 PM

Llewelly, I was going more for this but I liked yours a lot too.

Apropos of that. Nevermind the commentary - just read the cartoon.

#34

Posted by: DLC | March 15, 2010 4:22 PM

I am tempted to write more allusions to the words on the Euphemisms list.

#35

Posted by: cousinavi | March 15, 2010 4:50 PM

Chet Pussy: All right, pussy, pussy, pussy! Come on in pussy lovers! Here at the Titty Twister we're slashing pussy in half! Give us an offer on our vast selection of pussy. This is a pussy blow out! All right, we got white pussy, black pussy, Spanish pussy, yellow pussy, we got hot pussy, cold pussy, we got wet pussy, we got...
[sniffs]
...smelly pussy, we got hairy pussy, bloody pussy, we got snappin' pussy, we got silk pussy, velvet pussy, Naugahyde pussy, we even got horse pussy, dog pussy, chicken pussy! Come on, you want pussy, come on in, pussy lovers! If we don't got it, you don't want it! Come on in, pussy lovers!

And now, blue underwater pussy.

#36

Posted by: Charlie Foxtrot | March 15, 2010 7:26 PM

Is that clam bearded?

#37

Posted by: shegeek1000101 | March 15, 2010 7:53 PM