“I work around the clock– 1043 Planck times per second– providing the gravitational attraction to hold this galaxy cluster together. And some baryonic cosmologist wants to explain me away as a modification of Newtonian gravity?

“I have been silent for 13.7 billion years, but no more.

“I AM THE 96%”

(Original Pandora Cluster image from NASA)


  1. #1 Jacob Stewart
    October 26, 2011

    One word:


  2. #2 Steinn Sigurdsson
    October 26, 2011

    wow. totally f’ing awesome

  3. #3 Kate Nepveu
    October 26, 2011

    Your Nobel Prize is in the mail.

  4. #4 Neil Bates
    October 26, 2011

    Very clever, Chad.
    Well, pls. post something about the real OWS, too.

  5. #5 onymous
    October 26, 2011

    You rock.

  6. #6 Ethan Siegel
    October 26, 2011

    Very well done, Chad!

  7. #7 Christopher
    October 26, 2011

    This is another striking example of breaking the illusion of central position. Since WE are in the 4% it is obvious that it the 4% is the important part of things. If you take a truly objective stance that might turn out differently. This rolls back on the hierarchy. By weight, by volume, by regulating the biosphere, the single celled life on the planet is far more crucial than WE are. Some science guys view us as real estate for mitochondria, providing nutrients and mobility. Our concerns and designs matter little, and this may be a clue as to why we are so poor at managing things-that we were never meant to be this clever. OOPS.

  8. #8 Boson
    October 27, 2011
  9. #9 AV Flox
    October 27, 2011

    The Occupy movement is not something I like to joke about. It’s too important to joke about. However! This is brilliant and I needed the laugh. Thank you for posting it.

  10. #10 homunq
    October 27, 2011

    Where would you like your internet sent to?

  11. #11 Collin
    October 27, 2011

    The microbes couldn’t prevent us from becoming clever.

    Some people seem to believe in a mystical power that grants a mandate to whatever has the greatest physical quantities. There’s no such thing. In the end, rational thought always wins.

    The only way to stop the money-hoarders is to outsmart them.

  12. #12 max
    October 28, 2011

    @christopher: then the mitrochondria have been doing a really bad job :P they have been losing pieces of DNA for the last couple of billion years. Only 9 proteins left to intergratie in our own DNA and the mitrochindria as a “specie” is extinct :P

    but more seriously, indeed what is most important is a relative thing, depending on your point of view. But quite probably we are the only things on earth able to act en thing about it, so were like.. god. So now only to take our viewpoint, most life on earth?, most biodiversity? (why is life such a good thing anyway, why not say that the best thing is to have as many as possible rocks). or maybe: making it a world with the least suffering as possible taking the beings that are most capable of suffering in the highest regard ^^ (I the last one is my own :3)

  13. #13 brian
    October 29, 2011

    worked up a graphic! — http://i44.tinypic.com/fp4l8j.jpg

  14. #14 Doug
    October 29, 2011

    Get a job, hippies! I’m tired of the hard-working (light-)producing parts of the universe being blamed for their success. If it weren’t for us, you dark matter would drag us all back into a singularity!

  15. #15 willis
    October 29, 2011

    “The Occupy movement is not something I like to joke about. It’s too important to joke about.”

    Heh. Heh Heh. Bhwaaahahahahahahahahhahahahha.

  16. #16 R.C.
    October 29, 2011

    Willis, sign me up for seconds on the “Bhwaaahahahahahahahahhahahahha.” When Occupy N belatedly grows a brain cell, they’ll be nearly ready to play tic-tac-toe against a snake-handling fundamentalist.

    But let’s not threadjack; the original post was brilliant.

  17. #17 willis
    October 29, 2011

    “But let’s not threadjack; the original post was brilliant.”

    Agreed and agreed.

  18. #18 Ricci Moore
    October 30, 2011

    pppsssstttt….you’ve been instalanched!! This is awesome, thanks!

  19. #19 Bill
    October 30, 2011

    Magnifique!! Best 99% joke ever!

  20. #20 boson
    November 1, 2011

    Ooh ooh another one:

    “99% of the integral is dominated by 1% of the paths – Occupy Extremum”

    This is fun.

  21. #21 Neil Bates
    November 3, 2011

    Note that all this “material” that we don’t even understand being a majority part of the universe, just goes to show that we don’t really understand the universe.

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