Retrospectacle: A Neuroscience Blog

God Apologizes for Bounced Check

PZ notes a cataclysmic event: a bank actually turned down a $50,000 check written by the Almighty!

Kevin Russell found out it’s not easy trying to cash a check from God. The 21-year-old man was arrested Monday after he tried to cash a check for $50,000 at the Chase Bank in Hobart that was signed “King Savior, King of Kings, Lord of Lords, Servant,” Hobart police Detective Jeff White said.

Perhaps even more hilarious is the fact that the man had more checks signed by God (including one for $100,000)…you know, just in case the teller actually fell for the first check.

However, God himself has gotten wind of this embarrassing lapse, and apologizes on his surprisingly under-trafficked blog.

Look fellas, I appreciate your attempts to blame the kid, but this really is My fault. I may be omniscient and omnipotent, but My accountant is neither. I got a little carried away at the track last weekend and wasn’t watching My account balance closely and, long story short, today I had to get a loan from China just to pay Heaven’s electric bill.

Now you know why it’s so important that you put money in the donation plate in church. Money doesn’t grow on trees, despite My best efforts. I got pesos to grow on a bush one time, but a raccoon ate them. I was approaching My 7-day deadline so I didn’t get to try again.


  1. #1 J-Dog
    March 1, 2007

    Thanks for the link to God Shelley. That sucker’s got a LOT of ‘splainin’ to do! And he/she can start by answering my questions about why I didn’t get that damn pony for Christmas back when I was 9!

  2. #2 Shelley Batts
    March 1, 2007

    Heeeeey, *I* didn’t get a pony either!!! We should all rise up!

  3. #3 FhnuZoag
    March 1, 2007

    Maybe he should turn down that heater and electric grill in his basement, to save on those bills.

  4. #4 CaptainMike
    March 2, 2007

    Damn it! How often do I have to tell you two: God and Santa Claus are different people!

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