Do you ever play the game in which you fantasize about what you would do, career-wise, if you couldn't do what you're currently doing?
I do, particularly when I'm having an especially bad week or when someone is droning on AGAIN about stupid inconsequential stuff during a meeting or when I'm buried under piles of grading or when I'm seriously doubting my abilities to earn tenure at my current institution. So yeah, about once every 5 minutes.
Here's what's on my list, in no particular order:
- Patent lawyer (yes, I realize this requires yet more school. Remember, this is a fantasy list.)
- Consultant.
- Researcher in an industrial or governmental lab.
- Director/coordinator of undergraduate research.
- Professional organizer. This is the one I probably fantasize about the most.
- High school teacher/specialist teacher.
- Personal chef. As in, I'll come in and cook dinner and pack lunches for your family, and maybe even bake you some muffins for breakfast. Although I may try to secretly convert you into a vegetarian. With delicious food, not propaganda. :)
- Doing something that commercializes my current line of research.
- Workout buddy.
- Professional reader. I'll read all the books and magazines you don't have time to read and summarize them in such a way that you can talk intelligently about them. Sort of like Cliff Notes for adults.
- I can't think of a good title for this one, so let's just go for Teaching Consultant. You give me your syllabus, I'll design assignments for you. Or write your tests. I'll even come up with grading rubrics for you, although I refuse to do the actual grading.
What's on your fantasy career list?
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1. Science fiction author
2. Running a travel company specifically for nerds that goes to places like the Kennedy Space Center, Arecibo, etc.
Teacher (... but hopefully I am headed there before too long! Got my certificate and everything).
Applied and engineering physics.
Carpenter.
Mechanic (like, car).
Neuro/computer science.
This has me feeling like a completely boring person.
- Programmer. That may still happen, frankly, if this whole Biology Ph.D thing doesn't lead to the milk-and-honey promised land. Wait, what? The ivory tower isn't parked on the Elysian fields? Hmm...
- Fiction writer. I still love cheesy science fiction and fantasy, I just don't have time to read it anymore.
- Doctor, working with Doctors Without Borders.
- Billionnaire. Is that an occupation?
- Forgotten.
Seriously. Forgotten, as in, I have my desk, equipment and financing, and that fact has slipped through the administrative cracks, so it all gets renewed automatically every year, leaving me with doing whatever research I want, at my own pace, and without any extraneous demands or distractions.
Mechanical Engineer
Architectural Engineer
Architect
Poet
Quilter
Dropped-out, back-to-the-land, hippie
Whatever Susan Calvin was in Isaac Asimov's novels
Owner of a vegetarian restaurant that even meat-eaters would like to go to (all vegetarians secretly want to run vegetarian restaurants, lol)
But I am actually doing one of the jobs on the list right now... I'm a software "expert" at a large international corporation in a stable industry. I get to solve problems for users, teach classes, and travel. I have a terrific boss and nice people to work with. Hooray :)
I think about this list a lot, since I'm actively hunting for jobs...
Hi Jane! Want to be my personal chef & work out buddy? I need both right now. ;)
My list is a little crazy, but at the moment, most things seem preferable to being a student at the end of the semester.
1. ballet teacher
2. yoga teacher
3. biomathematics researcher
4. dentist/dental public health researcher (working toward this one supposedly)
5. massage therapist
6. vegan shoe tester/reviewer
1. A saleperson at CarMax. I know way more about cars than most of those people. My target clients would be the women. I hate the way sales people talk to women at car dealerships.
2. An interior designer. I loooove beautiful furnishings.
More school (Med/Women's Studies/Linguistic Studies/Physics/Astronomy) [I'm currently working towards PhD in engineering]
Carpentry/construction
High school teacher (math/physics)
Industry job in engineering
Pilot
Consultant
[Would definitely stay away from careers that involve a lot of writing.]
Never be afraid to share your dreams with the world, because there's nothing the world loves more than the taste of really sweet dreams. - Despair dot com
That said, some of my favorites would be:
Helicopter pilot
Paintball field owner/operator
Professional hockey goalie
Microbrewery owner/operator
Multi-million dollar lottery winner
Heck, a couple of those are almost reasonable!
1. Financier: The last true sorcerers, because everyone knows that finance is actually Black Voodoo Magic done with modern mathematical symbols.
2. Mathematician: Without the "I brought paper for the exam from home because the math department is poor" bit. (This is a quote from my final exam...)
3. Cool Hunter ala the heroine of Gibson's "Pattern Recognition".
Come to think of it:
4. William Gibson: Except younger; because writing not-quite-science fiction books with social and political undertones is the best.
5. R&D director for a tech company: Like being a scientist, but with all the benefits of big business (see better salary).
6. Thief: Obviously.
In the unlikely event that you do want to be a patent lawyer, the Patent Office will pay for 2/3 of your law degree while you work for them. :)
*Broadway dancer
*Consultant for the applied branch of my field
*professional development coach for scientists
*voiceover actor
*financial advisor
Wow! This is the best way to get to know one's readers. What cool lists you all have!
janne, I love the idea of "forgotten" as a career---very clever!
winawer, since these are fantasy lists, "billionaire" does indeed count as a career.
saiorse, I'll be your chef/workout buddy if you prepare my lectures and do my grading!
jenny, I had no idea that was true....good to know. Thanks!
ecogeofemme, I'd like to hire you as my professional development coach! Especially if you can help me figure out my department.
Used bookstore owner.
*construction worker
*engineer for a major food producer with a lot of power to make cool nutritious stuff
*consultant
*telling other people what they are doing wrong (and helping them fix it) without me having to find out what I'm doing wrong
*running a summer camp about math
Well, I've had to think about this one a lot lately...
3rd-grade teacher
Medical research
Writer for The Daily Show
Missionary
NSA/CIA
Professional blogger : )
Kind of funny... just posted about my ridiculous desire to become a florist the other day...
Puppeteer for the Muppets and/or Jim Henson's Creature Shop.
I GOT my fantasy job (although I did not know what it was when I started out, and had to sieve through oceans before IT FOUND ME). I teach 'scientific writing' and 'presentation skills' to graduate students in electrical and computer engineering at the best university in korea. Considering that I'm an entomologist, it's a pretty amazing gig. the cherry on top of the cream of the cream of jobs.
Got pubs? ready to leave your comfort zone? GO!
You know, there are positions available at national labs -- email me for details :)
My fantasy career list:
- Billionaire activist: I would take my billion dollars and invest it, and then with the interest, skim a little bit off the top for my own living expenses, but otherwise fund projects that I feel are important (e.g., schools in impoverished places, preserving the rainforest, etc.).
- Karate instructor: I actually taught children's karate for a year and it was great. I made like $100/month though so this is why it is on the fantasy career list.
1. 2nd baseman for the NY Mets.
2. Volcanologist.
Otherwise, I'm happy where I'm at.
I blogged about this a long time ago. I think it was before I started tagging posts, though. And of course the list is always evolving.
Every five minutes is probably about right though.
Good to know other people have these dreams too, though right now my only fantasy is getting done.