The flip side, though, is that her daycare is a home daycare, which means that if something happens to our wonderful daycare provider (like if she gets sick or has a family emergency), daycare is closed. Our Plan B for these situations is that we split daycare duties, with Mr. Jane taking the classes-and-office-hours shift. This is not ideal, but it's mostly workable---there have only been one or two times where one of us had to postpone a meeting as a result of the Daycare Shuffle.

But Mr. Jane travels as part of his job, and our Plan C is...well, we don't have one.

And we so desperately need a Plan C, oh, right about now.

I can't help thinking, in addition to the endless loop playing in my head right now*, how much easier and less stressful this situation might be if we had, you know, family-friendly workplaces. Like with emergency childcare resources available, or some kind of flexible, creative way to help deal with the occasional childcare (or family care) emergency. Or even just an acknowledgment that we're complex people with complex lives, and allowing for a way to blend all those pieces of our lives together more seamlessly, with less of a struggle. I guess I'm just frustrated with the fact that things like childcare/family care emergencies are pretty common among workers with kids/elderly parents/sick family members, but we all struggle on our own to find our own solutions, and hide this all from our bosses/colleagues, because god forbid we show any side of us that's not the "ideal worker"! When in reality, if we could just acknowledge that this is a common occurrence, and have a workable solution at the ready, well then we actually *could* be ideal workers because we could be actually doing our jobs! For pete's sake, this is not rocket science.

* The loop is currently sounding something like this: "oh my god I have SOOO much work to do! How am I going to get all of this done? There's no way I'm going to get it done! Forget that, how the hell am I supposed to concentrate when I have no idea who's going to be taking care of my kid this week? Could I actually bring her to that meeting? What if daycare is closed all week? I can't believe daycare is closed. I can't believe how much work I have to do! I wonder if [colleague] could watch her while I'm teaching? When the hell am I supposed to write that exam? And what about that research deadline? What am I going to lecture about tomorrow? I have no lecture for tomorrow! Will I get any sleep tonight?"

Possible hypotheses:
1. These faculty members never quite got over the teasing and hijinks aimed at them in junior high/high school and are exacting revenge on a powerless faction (junior faculty).

2. Lack of social skills (= not good at giving feedback in a constructive way).

3. Sick notion of a rite of passage ("My life was hell as junior faculty, so your life better damn well be hell too!").

4. Extreme need for milk and cookies/a nap/a glass of wine/a timeout.

* I'm not saying this is happening to me, but I've heard enough stories lately from my peers to make me think that this is not something that's limited to a few bad apples.

(Note: I've included all of the posts for the October Scientiae as well. Oddly enough, I was able to fit them all into this month's theme, so thanks to you all for writing such malleable posts!)

then chances are really good (like 100% good) that you will get really, really sick.

And if you're stupid enough to, oh, not take a day off to try and get better?

I'll leave that as an exercise for the reader.

(please excuse the radio silence while I try to get better.)

What my day actually looked like:
8:30-9: Respond to emails, put out fires
9-noon: Meetings
noon-1: Lunch with colleagues
1-2:45: More meetings
2:45-3:30: Grading, with several interruptions
3:30-4:30: Coffee with friends
4:30-5ish: Extension of the coffee/gossip session (um, can't I count this as networking? that's important, right?)

Somehow the term "runaway calendar" comes to mind when looking at this....Ah, the glamorous life of an assistant professor.

2. Which culminated in a 4am full-blown, all-out temper tantrum.

3. I got 3 hours of sleep. That number may be a bit generous.

4. This is on top of the huge sleep deficit I'm currently running.

5. Research is slooooooooooow. Software issues + summer students holding data hostage (OK, not responding to my emails, for like weeks now....I think I need to threaten to take them off the current pub author list) + finding it hard to find time to work on the stuff I really need to work on = bleh.

6. Class today went poorly. Really poorly. And this class has been awesome all year---love the students, students love me, we all love the material. Today? Not so much love for anyone or anything.

7. Did I mention that I was observed today? Yeah.

8. Too much time spent on things that are not going to earn me tenure, here or elsewhere.

9. And finally, no reprieve tomorrow: Tuesday is my busiest day of the week.

I think I'm going to run away and "forget" to leave a forwarding address. Or drink heavily. Or both.

A few days later, Mr. Jane comes up to me as I'm washing the dishes.

Mr. Jane: So, um, how's Colleague treating you these days?
Jane: (puzzled) Um, no different than usual. Why?
Mr. Jane: Well, is he still cool with your blog?
Jane: What the hell are you talking about?
Mr. Jane: You know, because you said he found your blog.
Jane: (smacks Mr. Jane upside the head) Um, that was a dream, honey.
Mr. Jane: (puzzled) Oh...

Sometimes I wonder what color the sky is in his world....

Possibility #1: Wednesday night at the poster session/opening reception. I can meet after 8-ish if we do this.

Possibility #2: There seems to be a rather large break after lunch on Thursday---well, ok, there's a plenary session, but nothing else scheduled. I'll be at the Systers lunch, but we could meet up between the end of the "lunch period" and the start of Session 3.

Possibility #3: Friday night at the Sponsor Night reception.

So, those of you who are interested: what's your preference? I'm thinking Thursday might be easiest to coordinate, but any of the times would be fine.

(and please, keep the comments and thoughts coming on the previous post---great discussion there so far!)

Should computer science, as a major and a field, be an exclusive club, or be open to all comers?